“Pride Month … should be a protest!” So says Geena Rocero, a Filipino-American supermodel, transgender advocate and founder of “Gender Proud.”

I actually agree with her. The point at which we depart ways, though, is what exactly we should be protesting.

Despite the endless litany of shouts to the contrary, the way a person is raised and what happens to a child in those early years usually plays a large role in someone ultimately experiencing same-sex attraction or gender dysphoria (formally known as Gender Identity Disorder, or GID). Though these are two very different issues, they both have several factors in common.

Maybe this month should be a protest against misguided, abusive or absentee parenting?

Very young children who struggle with these feelings can be helped, often by the way their parents engage with the child. Absent, hostile or overly-meek fathers combined with attachment issues with mothers or domineering mothers are frequent factors when GID is present, as is sexual abuse. So, should young children then be encouraged to “embrace” feelings of same-sex attraction, or should they get the love and guidance that might be genuinely helpful and address the root issues? Might it be worth noting that 70-75% of adolescents who indicate they’ve experienced same-sex attraction have no such feelings by the age of 25? A wait-and-see attitude by parents would often be prudent, as would be recognizing problematic behavior within the marriage.

Maybe this month should be a protest against the prior issues and malpractice of psychiatry?

Shouldn’t we start asking questions about why those who act on same-sex attraction experience significantly higher rates of emotional, physical and sexual abuse in relationships, as well as higher rates of suicide attempts and drug and alcohol abuse? To say such increased rates are simply because of a societal stigma doesn’t hold water, as similar rates exist in the Netherlands where “same-sex marriage” has long been accepted.

Up to 80% of kids who are dealing with gender dysphoria have moms who’ve had some type of psychiatric problem or some form of psychiatric treatment, mainly to treat symptoms originating from their struggle with gender identity, and up to 45% have fathers with such past issues.

A 1991 study showed for boys who identified as girls, 53% of their mothers had Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). For boys who knew that they were boys, only 6% of the mothers had BPD. Why aren’t many (or most) in the business of therapy asking about these factors, and treating the root cause?

Maybe this month should be a protest against lax teaching on the meaning of marriage?

Marriage has a twofold purpose – the unitive and the procreative. It’s not primarily about companionship, or the warm, fuzzy feelings you get with that special friend, or physical pleasure. Yes, those can be and hopefully are secondary benefits, but they aren’t the purpose of marriage. But just because “same-sex marriage” isn’t procreative, isn’t it still unitive? Well, depending on the study you look at, same-sex pairs have a rate of unfaithfulness of over 80%. Does that sound unitive? (Heterosexual unfaithfulness runs at about 22%.)

Maybe this month should be a protest against abuse?

Rates of all forms of abuse are higher within homosexual relationships, as well. For example, emotional abuse is reported at just under 50% for both men and women in heterosexual relationships. In homosexual relationships, it’s just over 80%. In heterosexual relationships, physical abuse is 14% for men and 24% for women. Those in homosexual relationships report 44% and 56%, respectively. (Yes – amazing as it may seem, women in lesbian relationships are far more likely to be physically abused than when their partner is a man.) Sexual abuse in heterosexual relationships is 2% for men and 9% for women, as opposed to 13% for both men and women in homosexual relationships. (Sources: here and here.) Does that sound like a dynamic that calls for pride?

I sympathize with the idea that some who have same-sex attraction or gender dysphoria feel compelled to protest. It isn’t the Catholic Church or traditional values that should be the target of your scorn, though. The Catechism of the Catholic Church and other Church documents discuss these matters with an abundance of truth and compassion — the only way genuine love can and should be expressed.

Pride isn’t a virtue and it’s not something to revel in. Nor is wrath. They both go down a road with no good end. There’s a different way — a way of eternal joy:

So then, brethren, we are debtors, not to the flesh, to live according to the flesh — for if you live according to the flesh you will die, but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body you will live. For all who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the spirit of sonship. When we cry, ‘Abba! Father!’ it is the Spirit himself bearing witness with our spirit that we are children of God, and if children, then heirs, heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with him in order that we may also be glorified with him. (Romans 8:12-17)