Print Article | Email Article | Write To Us

CNN vs. The Catholic Church

02/13/2013 Comments (41)

CNN has an editorial called "Why next pope must open up church and usher in Vatican III" prominently featured on its website. It rails against the Catholic Church and advises the Church that it must "modernize" or perish.

CNN giving the Catholic Church advice on pretty much anything is like the wonder twins while in the shape of a dove and a birthday cake giving Batman advice on how to be more menacing. No, it's like Justin Bieber re-mixing Mozart to make it better by adding a rap verse about junior high school heartbreak.

If you're wondering how seriously Catholics should take the advice of CNN. Let's compare the two institutions:


Catholic Church:
Founded 2000 plus years ago.

CNN:
Founded in 1980.

Hmmmm. I'm afraid that if I were going to take advice about how to preserve an institution I'd have to go with the Church on this one.


Catholic Church:
Founded by Jesus Christ.

CNN:
Founded by Ted Turner.

One is the Lord and Savior, the other thinks he is and has a cheesy mustache. Hey look, for me it comes down to this, Ted Turner was a terrific boat captain but Jesus walked on water. He didn't need the boat. That ceases to be a contest solely on that front folks.


CNN: 388,000 total daily viewers.
The Catholic Church: Over one billion Catholics.

That's not really a contest either, huh? CNN's viewership is a Catholic Church rounding error.


CNN Notables:
Wolf Blitzer?

Catholic Church Notables:
Aquinas, Augustine, Mother Teresa, Pope John Paul II, etc...


Current state of CNN:
Laying off workers because ratings are dismal.

Catholic Church
Growing.


Catholic Church guarantee:
The gates of Hell will not prevail against it.

CNN?
MSNBC prevailed against it.

 

Catholic Church diversity:
Has millions of Catholics of every color on every continent.

CNN
Has Al Sharpton on television just two hours away from primetime!!!


Artistic Achievements:

Catholic Church:
Inspired and preserved some of the greatest artistic achievements the world's ever seen.

CNN:
Kathy Griffin poking Anderson Cooper's nether region on air in the desperate hope of being noticed.

CNN strives very hard to be modern.
The Catholic Church is timeless.


 

Filed under

About Matthew Archbold

Matthew Archbold
  • Get the RSS feed
Matt Archbold graduated from Saint Joseph's University in 1995. He is a former journalist who left the newspaper business to raise his five children. He writes for the Creative Minority Report.