When my children were little, their dad use to ask them what the word patience meant. He'd usually pose the question when they were not showing any evidence of possessing that virtue.

Their response was automatic, “to wait quietly, daddy.” Patience is waiting quietly for something to happen. It is doing your best to not get angr y, frustrated or annoyed when what you want does not come as quickly as you want it to or not at all.

But in order to practice the virtue of patience, we have to have something to be patient about. As you have heard many times, practice makes perfect. Back-to-school time is a perfect time to take on this assignment.

So what are some ways to practice patience? First, we have to realize when we are getting impatient. Do you remember those times when your mom was on the phone a long time and you had a real important question to ask her but she just kept putting up her finger to tell you to wait? It felt like forever before she took the time to let you ask your question. That feeling of wanting to jump up and down or throw yourself to the floor in a wild fit is the feeling of impatience.

Now that you know the feeling, realize that you are going to feel it again, but this time you are going to talk to yourself before you get to the point of wanting to roll on the floor screaming. So, let's take the mom on the phone scenario again. How can patience help you to respond to this situation better? First, close your eyes and ask God to give you patience for this moment. You know that you are going to need it. Go to your mom and say excuse me. While you are waiting quietly for her to respond, use the time to say a prayer for someone.

Never waste time. Each and every minute is a gift from God, and we are going to need to tell him how we used our time someday. After you feel you have waited for a awhile, gently say again, “Excuse me, mom, may I interrupt to ask you a question?” If she says Yes, state it quickly and listen to her response. If she says No, accept her answer and walk away and wait for the best time to ask again.

When we get mad and frustrated, it really hurts us more than it helps. The feeling of impatience is an awful feeling. It usually makes a person feel angry and tense. But the truth is, each of us has the ability to decide how we are going to respond to something, and we can change how we feel by changing our actions.

The key to making this happen is prayer. There are some things that we all know we just need help with. Patience is probably the most prayed-for virtue of all. It does not come natural. How many babies do you know who wait patiently when they want something? Not many, if any. But when we pray, we are placed in the presence of God, and his peace just kind of oozes right into us. But we have to do the asking. God never forces himself on us.

It also helps to go to confession regularly. There are super graces that fill us with God's love that help us be more like Jesus, and we know Jesus is ver y patient.

Remember that God's greatest desire is to be with you at all times. He will always jump at any invitation you give him. He loved you so much that he left his perfect home in heaven to be with you. Give Jesus the deepest part of yourself — your heart. He will accept the gift and give it right back to you in the form of love, grace and virtue. You won't get all this goodness all at once. But if you're patient, it will be there soon enough!

Jackie Oberhausen writes from Fort Wayne, Indiana.