AMEN!!!!!!

Count me in! I’ve gone to the managers and they do nothing. I turn the covers over, but I’m considering bringing some cardstock paper with me to the store and just covering up the offensive covers myself. 

Agreed - like the same folks calling homosexual relationships - marriage!  Give me a break - they can’t produce the trophys I can produce.  Out of the hundreds of thousands of words in the English language and they go and try to steal a word that already has a perfectly legitamate meaning.  Get your own word.

Oh my goodness.  You like sex?!!?!?!?!  What in the world.

(somehow, I feel like that simple statement could cause significant drama.)

also, I’ve noticed that most of the stores I frequent (besides 7-11) have put the skanky magazines up high, where at least my 4 year old doesn’t notice them.

I do that - I turn them backwards or put Real Simple or Martha Stewart in front of them. If I had the money some days I think I’d buy them all and drop them in the dumpster.

Great article!! As an aside, most of the women in sports illustrated’s swimsuit issue aren’t wearing swimsuits, they are wearing paint. They aren’t wearing any clothes. Learned this whe I was working at a bookstore chain.

Spoken from my own heart.  The Cosmo magazines (can they actually be considered a magazine, really?) get covered by me every.single.time. I go to the store.  Oh, the store (to which I have complained countless times) makes some effort to put those placards in front of them.  But it doesn’t happen in every aisle nor every time.  Infuriates me.  I have 4 kids, one of whom is an 11 yo boy and another is an 8 yo girl.  I don’t want them to see this.  EVER.  It is a never ending battle in this society of ours but I refuse to give up.  I will continue to make this barely efficacious stand, for the sake of my innocents AND my innocence.

“It’s getting harder and harder to write for a general audience, because it seems like nobody knows anything anymore.”

So very true. I find that discussion of morals with non-religious people (and with not a few of the nominally-religious) has become almost impossible. A collapse of shared minimal standards, the wholehearted embrace of barefoot relativism, and an ever-diminishing ability or willingness to employ basic logic, all combine to make the fog ever-thicker.

This is the real reason for Godwin’s Law (and its yet-to-be-named corollary involving charges of racism). When Nazis and Klansmen are just about the only things in the world one can rely upon to be agreed as evil without argument, then of course we find ourselves at those wells again and again.

I complained once & it actually worked. Don’t give up.

“taut in some places and bouncy in others” This line was music to my postpartum ears! Thank you!

And I love the idea of turning the magazines around-count me in. I’ll probably become obsessive about it. Looking forward to it.

Our Walm*rt has the little plastic side-shields that cover the article titles on the side of Cosmo, but that doesn’t cover the image.  So I’m a magazine-turner too.  And now I think I will just ask, at the beginning of my grocery trip, every stinking week, for them to get rid of it or display it somewhere where it isn’t being shoved in my kids’ faces.  Vive le resistance!

I’m one of the people who turn magazines around :). I would also put it to store managers that if they would not tolerate me standing naked in a provocative pose in their checkout line at the store and perhaps have me arrested, why do they tolerate these other women doing so in print and in public? (I’m not bad looking for 50 even after having 4 kids). If I also said out loud what was written on the covers on the magazines, would also be turned out of their establishment in disgust? These magazines are soft-core porn and it is a rather insidious, but subtle form of bullying women into silence.

Thanks for addressing this, Simcha.

@Elaine: What? That’s disgusting. But it does make sense. How could a piece of fabric that tiny really cover anything?

@amy: Or shredder. :D

AMEN!  I recently spoke up at our local department store because directly at my oldest kids’ eye level (ages 6 and 7) there was a cutesy cartoonish poster about practicing safe sex. (By the water fountain, outside the bathroom, where my 7 year old stopped to read it on her way to use the restroom.) 
.
I. Was. Livid.  It was taken down immediately but I have no idea how many kids saw it before that.  Speak up, ladies!  And gentlemen!  We have a right and an obligation to protect the innocence of our children.

I’m so out of the loop I didn’t even know the swimsuit issue was out.  I guess BJ’s doesn’t carry it and I haven’t really been shopping anywhere else.  What I have noticed these last few month when I go into Target and Walmart (probably the only other stores I go into these days) is that they don’t have as many magazines as they used to.    And the ones they do have seem more along the lines of old lady magazines, like Readers’ Digest and Prevention.  I wonder if it’s because of complaints - has anybody else noticed this lately?

It’s because of the Internet, magazine circulation is collapsing.

preach!

Ewwww,  Micaela - that’s weird!    What the heck was that doing there??  Was it a chain department store or an independent?  If it was a chain, I’d definitely send an email to management and tell them what happened.  The person who took it upon himself to put it up (or have it put it) deserves to be fired.

You are so right. I will do what I can now while I am still able to get out and about.

Oh gosh.  I feel bad I didn’t complain last week when I was caught by si by accident.  I prayed my little one didn’t see it.  But then we turned the corner and my 3 year old said drolly ” I just saw something NOBODY should ever see.”  Out of the mouths if babes.  Better go call now.

I turned a magazine around - then immediately turned it back. Where the front was scantily clad - the back was a half naked ad.

another great article!  I’m in.  I don’t want my son learning that it’s ok to enslave himself to his desires or my daughter to grow up learning that it’s ok to enslave herself to someone else’s expectations.
.
Vive le resistance indeed!

Speak up, People.  Your names are being taken down, and you will soon be rounded up and shipped to “reeducation camps” in the Nevada desert.

Let’s face it, porn is not about promoting sex, but about horrifying it.  The real goal is less people.  Once you realize that, it all makes perfect sense.

Check out the AFA.net web site (American Family Association). They give instructions on how to contact pertinent officials.

I’m just so tired of getting my mad on.  I start thinking about covert ways to approach the matter like having some quick peel-off “censored” decals.  or when Planned Parenthood flies their blue and white flag proudly up and down State Street, I want to send a teenager out with a squirt gun that has vampire blood in it.  But the Sports Illustrated bumped up the sleaze factor this year, as did the Superbowl commercials, and Beyonce was shaking it so hard I always wonder how she doesn’t pull a tendon.  Even my immune husband got up to get a beer at half time.  Hey—even The Donald complained, which is a little funny and nauseating.
But sadly, for your garden variety of Cosmo images—most of us in the states with sunny beaches really are so immune, that we forget to be offended.
@Matt, I thought the same thing: “get your *own* word”!  so I’ve come out in favor of gay Schmarriage.  It doesn’t mean I approve of what they do before and after they’re Sshmarried.

About a year ago, I noticed that they were selling condoms in the “family friendly” (no candy) check-out aisle at my local grocery store. I complained about it 3 times and finally they removed them. I check every time I go there and they haven’t brought them back. I don’t know if I was the only one that complained or not.

I’m the obnoxious one who turns magazines around always. Been doing it forever. No anger. No outrage. Just one small obnoxious almost habitual step for humankind ... If I can protect the few innocent folks in line behind me at the CVS and my kids, by golly, I’ll do. I’ll do it! (Look, now you’ve got me riled up.) Put a shirt on, indeed.

“We’ve made too many compromises already; too many retreats. They invade our personal space and we fall back. They bear entire breasts and we fall back. Not again. The line must be drawn HERE! This far, no further!”

Add the gossip rags to the list too. Nobody need to know about all the dreadful stuff they report!

So many pushbacks by village councils against prayer come when “one person” or a “few people” complain.

It really should be as effective if one or a few people complain about a lack of a family-friendly aisle or the presence of the magazines at all, depending on the layout of the store. Two or three make note, and the manager will probably find it easier to move or shield the magazines.

And then big thanks are in order. So many people forget to close that loop.

Amen!  My husband subscribes to SI.  He doesn’t seem to have noticed that I have dropped the swimsuit edition directly from the mailbox to the recycling bin for the last 3 years.  My 8- and 11-year-old sons don’t need to see that in the house, not even for a moment.

I read a book about the Russian occupation of Poland in the 70’s and 80’s.  Of course, you hear a lot about “life behind the iron curtain,” but this was a novel, and as such it explored the spriritual/psychological dimensions of religious people and artists living under communist domination.

The premise of the novel is that the resistance is trying to convince this minor artist to immolate himself in a pan-global televent that the party is staging to showcase communism.  I won’t tell you how the story ends - it’s a great read.  But one question that runs throughout is: will it even make a difference?

If we all burned ourselves at the register in Pathmark, would it make the slightest difference?  At this point, only Christ’s return will make any difference at all.

@Claire: You can opt out of receiving the swimsuit issue. I believe there’s an option to select on the website; or calling Subscriber Services ought to do the trick as well.

...and then there was the infamous gift my 22 y.o. gave my 25 y.o. for Christmas.  He brought it back from the Salvatore Dali museum in Spain, and had it framed as a housewarming gift.  It is a classic Dali with photo realistic but distorted animals in the background, and a giant nude woman draped over a rock with a sea urchin.  I don’t know who was more pleased with himself, the recipient of the gift, (who now goes to sleep with it on his wall, and wakes to it every morning),or the giver, who got to make his grandmother blush and fume in the corner.  All I could do was shake my head and mock them a little.

Don’t be a philistine, anna lisa.  Don’t you appreciate “art?”

I wonder what the significance is of the sea urchin?

Do you know that Dali confounded all of modern art by converting to Catholicism in his latter days?  A much better outcome than Hemingway.

We will be called the scarlet letter of the 21st century, censorists and the answer to that is, “Damn straight.”  I hate those Cosmo magazines that are near the front of the pharmacy. Having new readers, it’s hard for me to have them near the counter with those big Red Letters “HOT SEX TONIGHT!” next to the airbrushed lady bursting out of the painted nothing she’s wearing.  Holding up a lighter for this one Simcha.

I was one of those people who turned the Sports Illustrated magazine around, only to find myself annoyed by a suggestive picture of the “lady” green M&M.  But I left it because the near nudity on the front wasn’t as bad as sexy chocolate, (bad as the latter may be).

My teenage daughters especially like to flip the magazines around.
We, too, have noticed that some of them are printing disgusting stuff on the back covers as well…

My 6 year-old at the time new reader asked me what “blankety, blank, blank, blank.” meant? He read it off the cover of Cosmopolitan. I took it to customer service and told them I didn’t appreciate having to explain this to my 6 year old child… her response - “Well, if they don’t learn it here, they’ll learn it on the bus.”  What?! So that is the rationale? They are going to learn it anyways so who cares?!  What they learn from kids is one thing—what they learn from ADULTS who design the clothes that don’t cover us in the stores, who purchase the styles for their stores, who model the clothes that don’t cover us, who sell and display the clothes that don’t cover us….that has GOT to change. The ADULTS form the consciences of the kids. Be NOT AFRAID to be a voice.
Media has got to change! Our TV shows have got to change…Love OneMillionMoms watchdog group for the media. Our voices do get heard. SPEAK!
Buying the icky mags and throwing them out still drives the market for those mags- oh if people could buy out those companies instead!! and the media stations! and the radio stations!...everything we purchase on our charge cards is monitored…buy a different magazine, a different swimsuit, a longer skirt, more modest pants…this is your way of VOTING. Buyers for the store buy what sells. Tell them what you want to see.
Buy and if you can pay full price for what is worth buying…vote! Ask for what you want to see in the stores—they want a profit and they will order what sells… Ask for Catholic/Christian/Religious magazines, music, books, Bibles, etc…and then buy them when you see them in the stores. VOTE!
I want to collect all of my receipts for the year of shopping largely at Walmart for both groceries and domestic items for a family of 7 and say—this is what you will lose from me if you don’t start covering up those porn mags—oh, and I have friends that would be more than happy to do the same! Am I serious, yea- and here’s the list of stores that will get my business instead - and list them!!!

Mrs. Fischer, you are a good Catholic:  “. . . these things are porn.”  You know that they don’t rise to the level of pornography, as defined by the Catholic Church (at least the covers—I don’t know what kind of prose is in some of these magazines), and so you call them porn.  That is fair enough.  There should be a word for material whose only goal is to inspire masturbation or to inspire obtaining pornography and then masturbation.  One negative side-effect of this kind of stuff that people haven’t mentioned is that all of this type of material negates the need for people to come up with ways to amuse each other.

You have critics?

The best thing to do is to demand to speak to a manager, and to harass them. Yes, I said harass. They are harassing you, so you harass them. Every time you go to the store. I did this as a teen and got the porn taken out of a local gas station. It works.

Thank you SO much for writing this. Yes.  A billion times yes.  Just because someone says it is <insert euphemism here> does NOT make it good for us.  Nature is a hard and completely unforgiving reality.  Violate the mind and body at your own peril, regardless of how it feels at the moment.

And scan your receipts from the stores competitors and email them to whatever public relations or marking exec you can find

I hate the SI swimsuit issue!  My husband and I share a vacation home with my inlaws.  We are never there at the same time though.  One of the last times I went there my brother-in-law left his copy of the swimsuit issue out in the open….so I trashed it.  He was livid.  To me it was junk, so it got tossed.  Everyone is mentioning their kids…and I have two young boys and definitely don’t want them seeing this, but what about the poor guy in the checkout who is trying to not look at that stuff?  I know they are out there somewhere…My seven year old is on the right track.  When he sees a female jogger scantily clad he covers his little brother’s eyes and tells me, ‘mommy that lady barely had anything on, that is disgusting!’  Haha!  It gives me hope!

“I don’t want to have to come up with a reason that soft porn doesn’t belong in the supermarket next to the breath mints.”  You mean right next to the salacious gossip, the horoscopes and psychic predictions, and (in more places than I would have believed) the books of love spells?  It’s getting to the point where it almost seems that friendship of the world is enmity with God.

@RichardC—Seriously, the Catechism’s definition of pornography is a bit absurd.  No doubt this is part of the reason we sometimes hear very oddly-phrased statements about whether or not a certain priest or bishop has been caught in possession of pornography.  I would call ANY image intended (by either the “artist” or the viewer) to incite lust pornography.  (Yes, that does mean that some pictures may be pornography to one person and not to another, depending on how he reacts to them.  That may be complicated, but it’s realistic.)  At any rate, we can certainly fall back on the older terminology and call them “impure images”.

I live in a small town with two grocery stores, both chains. We know the manger at the inexpensive one we shop at. He doesn’t have any say about the magazines - where they are located and what they stock. The chain has a contract with the magazine providers. We’d have to contact the CEO or board with our complaints. But it’s always about money and we prudish cranks don’t have enough buying power. So the best temporary measure is for the customer to rearrange or cover offensive magazines. When my kids get to reading and curiosity age, I avoid taking them to the grocery store. I usually go shopping by myself. If there is a kid with me, I tell them not to look at the magazines. Some families have their kids sit on the benches at the front of the store and wait for them until they are done with check out.

I’ve always been a magazine mover, and I plan to continue until I die. I also move those special “Jesus” editions that are so informative about his wife, or how he would have not liked to have been turned into God, etc.

“For crying out loud.  It’s getting harder and harder to write for a general audience, because it seems like nobody knows anything anymore.  Why do we need to go to the manager of the store and politely request that a piece of cardboard be put in front of the magazines that have the most obvious nipples on the cover?  Why is this even necessary?  And how is it possible that we might not even be listened to?” 

Speed. The speed of cultural change just keeps increasing. Witness the speed with which public opinion on same sex marriage has changed.

The speed of change will solve this problem faster than you may think. As Elaine noted on Friday, Mar 8, 2013 10:16 AM (EST): “. . . because of the Internet, magazine circulation is collapsing.” Desperation on the part of those flogging hard copy media has probably contributed to more sensational covers. But what kind of digital eye candy will replace magazines at the check out? Whatever it is, you can be sure that most people will quickly adapt to seeing it and taking it for granted. Although maybe advertising screens will adapt to our electronic profile as we pass by, as in the movie “Minority Report,” so none of us will ever see anything we find personally offensive.

The whole check out process is probably headed for the dustbin of history anyway. While we wheel our groceries out the total amount will be calculated from the costs broadcast from the RFID devices attached to our purchases. We will wave our smart phone at a kiosk to pay.

One problem solved.

Or wives.

@Lisa, I think it is really important that you affirm to your son that the jogger who passed by is *not* disgusting, and then explain to him *why*.

@Matt B, I have good philistine days and bad ones.  Yes, I knew about Dali converting, and appreciate how far he had to come from some rather sketchy periods of his life, and some interesting obsessions.  I love that iconic painting of Christ crucified from above.  It is sublime.  What a gift.

@Howard Richards—I can’t perfectly recall the Catechism’s definition of pornography at the moment, but I recall looking at it as sort of a firebreak to defend the intimacy of the marital act.—and in that sense, I would say it isn’t absurd.  I think the definition in the Catechism assumes good will on the part reader to think of better ways to spend one’s time than thinking up exceptions to the definition.—the definition along with the knowledge that we are obliged to avoid occasions of sin is sufficient, no?  Anyway, I think a definition that included everything objectionable that doesn’t also exclude much that is permissible is impossible or else would have to be so vague as to be “anything that incites lust”.

Amen!  I do the very things you suggest at my local groery chain store on a routine basis.  In fact, I ran into a friend and her lovely young adult daughter last week at the checkout, and brought them with me to complain to the manager about the half breasted Cosmo cover, so the mgr. was outnumbered. :)  Every single time I go into that store I flip over Cosmo, turn it upside down, and stick a food magazine in front of it.  Of course all this is to no avail, but I really want to get a local moms campaign going to pressure them.  I’ve been too busy to remember to do that, but eventually I will!  So there are others who feel the same way you do out there!

@Lisa - I was thinking the same thing as Anna Lisa.  The human body isn’t disgusting.    My husband likes to say somethng to the effect of, “That poor girl.  She mustn’t be able to afford any clothes.”

I disagree.  It is disgusting to dress skimpy.  The lack of modesty is disgusting.  The human body is NOT disgusting.  My son knows the difference.  I think you all are nit picking here.

You know what I think would be superb art?  There’s a german novel by Heinrich Boll called “Group Portrait with Lady” (which I highly recommend).  I sincerely think that you could emulate that concept with your family.  Of course, you would be “the Lady.”  Pictorially, it would probably be superb; but I think the best setting would be in a series of dialogues between you and your children - during different periods of their lives.  I think the challenge would be to set these off against monologues of you praying or contemplating.  I see this as being a potentially moving and deeply spiritual work of art.  I get royalties for the idea.

Matt B on Friday, Mar 8, 2013 3:23 PM (EST):

—-> anna lisa

Matt, I’ll have to mull that over.  Did you read the novel in German?
@Lisa, I understand the response because I have said it myself.  A very wise priest wearing a long black cassock called me out on that one.  It took me by surprise, but his explanation was so beautiful, it changed the way I look at the problem on the spot.
Just think of all the creeper guys out there who needed to have that same conversation before their self loathing turned into more destructive attitudes.  Creepy Guys often have freaky mothers! (No—I didn’t aim that at you…)

@Lisa - but ultimately a woman dressed inappropriately provocatively should be an object of pity, not scorn.

Anna, you really are a charmer.  I can barely form an english sentence and you’re having me read Boll in the original!  How have I achieved this lofty status in your esteem and imagination?

I want to add a little something to the mix: did you ever consider that writing you do (in this forum for instance) could be designed by God to change the course of human events?  Did you ever consider that a sacrificial act of love - such as writing “Group Portrait with Haggard and Discheveled Lady Asking Herself How She Ever Got into This in the First Place” could be the answer, say, to pornographic images at the checkout counter???

Having worked as a magazine merchandiser, I can tell you that flipping the magazines makes work, not for the cashier, but for a person whose job it is to place that smut out there. (So if you flip the mag at the beginning of the week, it may very well stay that way until we come back to service that store: up to a week!) Every time I would find a magazine turned around, I just sent that one back to the distributor (thus removing one piece of smut from distribution). I hated handling those mags and I am *so* glad to be out of that position.
BTW, DON’T buy the magazines and dump them. They’ll just be replaced. DO complain to the manager because he CAN refuse delivery of the filth!

Simcha: Love your work!! “Sports Illustrated Forgot To Wear a Swimsuit Issue” was genius.

Matt, If you say you can “barely form an English sentence” than I say “off to confession!” to you for false modesty.  As for the “haggard and disheveled” part, thankfully that same priest I referred to above saved me from the doom and gloom of that temptation.  I get up an extra ten minutes earlier just so nobody can accuse me of “giving up”. :)—One would hope that true love conquers all; but when a priest who listens to thousands of confessions from husbands and wives gives that kind of advice, I sit up and listen.  I can’t say that I never get offended, but I *listen*.  When my dear friend in Spain told me her priest told her to keep “steak” in the house so her husband wouldn’t go prowling for hamburger, I. got. offended.

We used to have an older,now deceased,gentleman at church.When a young girl in a very short skirt approached him at a parish event he handed her a quarter & said “Here, go buy the rest of the dress.”
He was a transplant from NYC or Jersey, so you can fill in the accent & attitude.

I experience acutely the temptation to banter, and you’re an incorrigible good sport anna lisa, but I’m going to reiterate my main point in no uncertain terms:

I feel even from our brief acquaintance that you’re withholding a grace that God has given you to share.  From my own experience I can see that you have an uncommon wisdom and a bountiful love to share.  That’s why I, quite seriously, suggested the Boll idea.  I think you could do it; I think it would be good; I think people (like myself) would benefit.

I’m dead serious in my conviction that you have a world-shaking contribution to make.  I seal that with a promise to help you in whatever way I can to realize that.

Matt, you are so kind to say that.  Life keeps teaching me lessons that make me go back and erase prior assumptions.  I have added and erased so much that I’m fearful that the wine is too new.  But *thank you* for the vote of confidence.
When I go to confession on Saturday, I’m going to confess to playing a little “hooky” on the internet.  The clean clothes are almost stacked to the ceiling.
TGIF:)

anna lisa, I also want to extirpate from your mind and your consciousness something you mentioned above, regarding “hamburger and steak.”  When I read this reference I was so utterly repulsed that I wanted either to vomit or cry.  It’s inconceivable to me that a true man of God would use such vulgarity to describe marital relationships, in any context whatsoever.

My wife is a funny sort of person, with all kinds of personality “ins and outs.”  But I love her regardless of her capacity to afford me physical gratification.  In fact, if marriage is anything, it’s both “with” and “without.”  Any man who can’t handle that should check in with his mother.

I do hope we can continue to correspond in this way, and I bless you, your family, and all their dirty clothes.

I love this…heck, I even turn magazines that have pictures of Obama (either one) on them!  I’ll probably end up in Obama’s gulag for that.

Rock on Sista! Here in Austin, we are currently working on trying to get an appointment with the CEO of the grocery store chain HEB. It is not without its hurdles, but the door is not closed yet. We want to explain very simply to him how “75 ways to do it with your boyfriend” probably doesn’t lead to more love. or stability in society. How it might even lead to more unwed sex, which might lead to more STD’s or more pregnancies or abortions or single mothers struggling to raise kids by themselves. His decision to be a “tastemaker” instead of pandering to sales might even make a difference in this world. If we are not able to see him, (ie if he is too “busy”) we may consider a “van campaign”  of moms who go from store to store to have a group conversation with the manager of the store on a busy Saturday, perhaps having even dropped a press release or two.. The media loves stories about sex, so let’s give it to them! Greta Atkinson, Austin Women’s Voices

Haven’t we already had this comment thread like, four times? Including the proud mother whose “modest” child loudly insults a scantily clad jogger? I am sorry but I want to tear my eyeballs out sometimes. Why can’t we come up with anything more interesting to discuss on this absolutely critical topic of our own laziness and acceptance of grocery store pornography? (And I mean that.)  Geez why have we accepted it up until this point?
.
Anyway, thanks Simcha. I shared this “In honor of International Women’s Day” on my Facebook page.

I, too, turn covers.  But as good as the covering does, keep in mind that all the subliminal airbrushing is still there and all the “f**k, s**k, sex” is written not only over every face on every magazine cover, but on food, too.  Nothing makes me happier when I sit down with someone who doesn’t believe it, point it out to them (it’s tricky, but start by looking for an “X” and go from there) and have their eyes finally see it.  And then get boiling, freaking, crazy mad, mad enough to start writing letters and telling other people about it.

@Corita: well, blogs are like that!  If it was a roomful of people having the same conversation over and over, I could see being annoyed; but a blog is more like a waiting room with people coming and going, so you’re bound to hear the same things over and over.  And honestly, I’ve been blogging for seven years, and I have discovered that there are actually only, like, eleven things to say.  The trick is not to say them twice in a row.

.

@NYa:  what do you mean?  That sex and sexiness is used to sell food?  I’m not arguing with you’re, just not sure if I understand what you’re saying.

.

My basic rule is that you teach kids not to say insulting things about other people, even if what they say proves that you’re raisin’ ‘em right.  (This does not include rolling down the windows to shout “YOU FORGOT YOUR PANTS” at people in shorty shorts, because that’s hilarious.”)

That’s great Greta. One note to add. Grocery and most retail stores live by establishing repeat customers. Most local managers will have mags there to just add a few pennies to the bottom line. Upper management doesn’t care until they see large family grocery bills going to the competition. That’s when you will see things really happen. I guarantee if even a small group could show that they are shopping elsewhere, you may see some change.

Oh, I checked my email and saw Simcha’s comment. My brain is in a post-stomach-virus fugue but I do see how cranky I sound. NOT at the topic of this blog, which I like, but at the horrifying idea of yet another Catholic boy being raised to assess the clothedness of women around them. Please forgive me, Simcha, Lisa and all. Lisa, this is not a dig at you, just.  I wish that it was easier than it is to support our children’s natural modesty and still not raise prudish and judgmental children.  Maybe someday I can be as polite as annalisa.

@Simcha, as much as I try to teach my kids things, I find myself having to repeat myself over and over again.  There is another aspect to the modesty issue—most of us develop a natural sense of modesty right?  The kids before the age of five are starting to acquire a few inklings about modesty, but they still delight in running around naked.  I had a couple of kids that would instantly stop a temper tantrum and become happy if I would take their diaper off.  Well, to get to the point, my two teen aged boys will walk in the room and if they see their three y.o. sister naked they shriek at her to get her clothes on saying “you’re disgusting!”  I can’t begin to tell you how many times I have had to correct them about their knee jerk reactions and discomfort with what I consider totally innocent nudity. Where do they get this?  Not from me (not overtly anyhow)It must be a product of fallen nature.

@Corita,(polite, eh? Heh) I just got finished posting something about my two teenaged boys telling their tiny little sister “you’re disgusting!”  When she lounges a little bit between changes.  So I know there is a natural component of human nature involved too.
Darn Spam monitor.

I agree with the disgust aimed at soft core porn in grocery aisles…  But I have to say I’m a bit offended by a child calling a jogger disgusting.  What would the jogger have to be wearing ( or not wearing) to earn the disgusting title?
Shorts and a running bra are perfectly acceptable in my book. I’ve tried running in a modest workout top and its just too dang hot. I’m sweating! I’m trying to stay in shape, not suffocate and die! If a man would get a pass to run shirtless, women should be able to run in a sports bra… not a string bikini, mind you…  But a sports bra.
.
Maybe the greater question is who gets called disgusting? The woman who needs to lose weight and is especially sweaty and uncomfortable running? Or the sinewy, fit, taut lady who inspires lust ( and jealousy)?  Think about that… no human body should be called disgusting, unless your talking about the charred lungs of someone who smoked themselves to death…. Or the compounded rolls of fat from someone eating and avoiding excerise to death.

.
Sorry mommy… if my kid called a healthy person, exerting her body for health in reasonable running clothes disgusting… He’d get a mouthful of dish soap!

But I have to confess something here.  All we basically have here in our city are the giant, Behemoth, grocery stores.  The very thought of going up to some dude with a “manager” tag on makes me think: “spitting in the wind”.

@Matt I agree with you on that.  I’d like to think this is only a problem in Spain…Anyhow a creep is going to be a creep no matter how much his wife is on board with that vulgar thing the priest said.

Ugh our attempts here usually leads to change (covers) for a couple weeks then back to business as usual. And then I give up. Thank you for the reminder that this matters. My son is 5 and reading more and more these days and so I think it will become even more important to me. The story titles I swear are worse in some cases than the pictures!!

Anna Lisa- State Street? I think we totally live in the same county. But I live in the less-exciting northern part, hehe :)

Ironically, women speaking out is exactly what got us into this mess in the first place. It definitely won’t get us out. It just makes everything a touch more annoying. Ladies! Shut up! Stop meddling!

And what about the Victoria Secret ads on TV?  They are soft porn as well.

My friend’s little girl screamed when she saw the cover. I haven’t seen it yet. I’ve been stuck home sick with my six little kids all week. Our grocery store (Wegmans) which is the only place I dare to go by myself with the kids (besides the doctors) is usually pretty good about keeping the porn covered. But I will make sure and complain if I need to next time I’m there. I’m so sick of all that trash. It makes me so angry that adults are doing this to our kids!

Do you wish men were more engaged in your parish? Then… Shut up! Stop meddling! Do you wish your husband were a better leader and role model for your sons? Shut up! Stop meddling! Do you wish porn were restricted to curtained rooms and special stores and theaters or not allowed at all like it was back when men were in charge and women were less meddlesome and outspoken? Shut up! Stop meddling!

Hi, Ham Solo, I remember you and your game, where you say nasty things to women and then women yell at you and then you get off on it.  Knock it off or you’re banned.

I attempted a number of years ago to have our local Piggly Wiggly cover Cosmo.  They called it censorship.  I turned them around myself or put another mag in front of it when the back cover was just as innapropriate.  Well I was spurred on this year totry again and they covered not only Cosmo with a black med type board but also the “forgot to wear a swimsuit ” issue without my saying anything specifically!  I thanked them profusely of course.  Cashiers agreed with me and would even turn the mag around too.  It can be done!  Try again if they have ignored your request.  And pray!

When trying to get your store manager’s attention:
Produce the convenience card of the nearby competitor at the checkout, and remark loudly how much cheaper they are when the card is returned.
Discover the prevailing medical condition of every checkout person.  If they’re an adult working a supermarket checkout, there’s a medical condition involved.  Talk about your health plan.
For every supermarket manager, there’s someone else who really does the work.  You’ll find her busting it in the back aisles.  Get to know her REALLY WELL.
Kids populate checkouts, and are really amenable to kooky talk from old folk.  Cultivate a reputation for far-right, outrageous contentions.
Compliment everyone on the good job they’re doing.  That slow old poke in deli is really an angel, and will serve as a conduit for immense graces.
Enjoy your trip to the supermarket: you don’t need an ipod to dance in the aisles.  Song is everywhere.
Of course, everyone will want to know how expensive things have become.  Share it with someone close to you.
Managers only hear three or four words: food contamination; filth; dated products; and losing core customers.  You can tell who these people are by identifying high-margin items, and who uses them.  When you happen to notice one of this group shopping the aisles, mention the other three words above.
Groceries are a commodity, and margins are razor thin.  Carrying smutty magazines has nothing to do with who buys them.  They set up an involuntaray buying response in men and women alike.  They are the MSG of the grocery world.

I couldn’t be bothered to read all these comments, but if you shop at Aldi you won’t be exposed to the smut and you’ll save quite a bit of money.

Hehe, you mean ham solo is for real? Sounds like a funny caricature of sexism.  He forgot to say the part about how porn isn’t even about women, anyway. It’s TOTES separate from the relationships men have with real women, okay?! NOT AT ALL RELATED so really just calm down, wimmin!

I hate to say this, but you have the supermarket porn thing all wrong.  These aren’t magazines, but religious articles.  And you’d be surprised to see how many people are bowing down.  Naked women and buff men serve as an irresistable stimulant for paying outrageous prices for staples like food and paper goods.  They are like the buddhas you see at your favorite chinese restaurant.  Suppliants comb the aisles to cull out just the right plum to serve their tutelary goddess at the checkout.  Kim Kardashian has been know to boost sales by 4.7%  You don’t need a boycott, you need an exorcist.

1(?); 2(?); 3(?); 4(?); 5(?); 6(?); 7(?); 8(?); 9(?); 10(?); 11(?)...

@Simcha, I’m not kidding when I say that my kids would yell at *men* in tight spandex shorts.  There was an endless stream of mostly men and a few intrepid women going up and down Mt. Tamalpais, on mountain bikes when we lived near the top.  I couldn’t get them to stop rolling the windows down and yelling things like: “Spandex warrior!” at them.
@Matt, what’s up with *that* my friend?

A reference to Simcha’s observationi above that there are only 11 possible comments in the whole of blogdom, and that the key is to alternate them without too much consecutive repetition.  In the words of the famous Simcha, “Le Sigh…”

I did notice that the extant discussion seemed to focus exclusively on female specimens of the horrid porn plague.  My own observations seem to indicate that, while men on magazines are rarely undressed to the extent of offending women, they are nevertheless “out there.”  I wonder why a blog consisting of all women failed to mention more than once that men appear on mags?

Regading Simcha’s observation, I need to note that this was the entire thesis of Watson and Crick.

Great job Simcha! I am a casual magazine hider. Now I’m going to step it up a little more and have some chats with managers, when I have time, and no kids with me. You are right-it’s porn, plain and simple and we are all gradually getting a bit desensitized and “oh well, what can I do”. Thanks for the plan to clean up the checkout areas of the country.

I noticed you’re online, anna lisa.  I’m here praying over some things that have been troubling me.  If you want, we can relate it to checkout counters at supermarkets.  For instance, even more insidious than smutty magazines are the child-level candy bars you can’t get past like a gauntlet.  And what about the toy aisle.  What in God’s name are toys doing in a supermarket?  And what if you want a non-descript item like spam or cheez-wiz.  They don’t fit into any category so nobody knows where they are.  And what about a middle-aged guy like myself in a sweatshirt, trying to suck it up for the checkout nymphettes.  There’s always some tall redhaired wiseguy teenager to make snide comments about whatever.  Supermarket tribulation.

“The problem with pornography isn’t that it shows to much of a person, but that it shows too little.”

Said a pope once.

Simcha,
Great lead-in.  I have nothing to contribute to the porn mags subject, but the earliest reference that I recall to “Serving steak at home, why would the husband go elsewhere for hamburger” was attributed to Paul Newman, explaining why he stayed faithful to Joanne Woodward.
But I don’t recall what year that was.
TeaPot562

Teapot - that was Fred Flintstone in 4 Billion BC.

I have always wondered what would happen if I called the grocery store manager over to the check out line and asked him or her to read the cover of cosmo out loud, as well as demanding that the manager explain what the headlines mean. I haven’t had the gumption to do this yet, but my daughter is only a year old, so I see this coming up in the near future.
Make them justify selling this poison. Make them “own it”. Preferably in front of their paying customers. 

Bill - according to some, it would be a wonderful thing if your daughter grew up to appear on cosmo.  I hear your indignation, but you’re missing the disconnect in values.  People don’t disrespect the way you feel, they contemn you for it.  “What’s the matter, you hung up about sexxx?”

I just wanted to amend my comment to Bill: You’re laboring under a critical misconception.  You said, “my daughter is only a year old…”  But in fact, you don’t have a daughter.  The little girl you consider to be your daughter belongs wholly and entirely to the people and corporate entities which will take possession of her more and more as time goes by.  These include toy makers, media moguls, providers of government services, makers of video games, movie and music performers, purveyors of cosmetics, the NEA, the democratic party, an entire cadre of pedophile professors, the billionaire owner of the corporation she will work for, and the UN.  Don’t be fooled again.

Simcha, fantastic article! I found this through a link from Newadvent. I love the article and love the wonderful comments. I see these mags all the time in the checkout lines and, I’m sad to admit, just felt I could nothing about them.  You have inspired me! I will be turning and covering as much as I can from now on.  I have a 10 year old daughter and a 15 year old son and my wife and I try to combat the overwhelming avalanche of sexual stimuli on all fronts to protect them.  We try to even steer away from the regular tv programming but we get sabotaged in the most unsuspecting places: food tv! Can we please just cook on cooking shows?  Do they have to say that their lasagna, steak, dessert etc is “sexy” over and over? Not to mention the closeups of some of the scantily clad hosts/chefs eating seductively. Drives us nuts, because we are foodies and so are our children. Keep up the fight!  There are more our us devout Catholics out there than the media wants to admit or portray.  AMDG

You are a delight and I agree, we DEMAND it!
Guess who’s spending the most money at those stores…we are!

I used to complain WITH my boys in tow every time when they were younger, and sometimes it worked, so they got both a lesson and encouragement to try and change what we can change.  Maybe I called their attention to it, but I surely believed that in later years their little hormone filled teenage eyes were GOING to see it anyway.
Once, the store refused to do anything and shortly it closed.  Hmm…coincidence?  Maybe, but you can bet I pointed it out to the kids.  New owner was family-friendly and the only neighborhood place that we frequented after that.

It helped of course that their dad is a faithful, Godly example for them who never shied away from calling them out and leading them in the ‘way they should go’.  (matter of fact, it is THE most important factor, bar none, in my humble opinion—ha)

Women of Faith, unite!
Thanks for your wonderful encouragement in your writing.

These are my final thoughts on this topic:  I think it is a miracle beyond all compare that there is a Kate Upton is this world.  I think it does neither me nor her any favors in the long run that there are ten million pics/vids of Kate Upton in the world.  From my point of view, mostly because men are foolish.  Finally, I would like to know if Catholic women have as much vitriol toward Michaelangelo’s statue of David—or just what there thoughts are about that.

@QueenieB, THANK YOU for pointing that out.  I think this is the most important antidote of all: Two parents, living, speaking and *calmly* living in the world we live in—essentially becoming Christian interpreters for all that their children encounter.  When I had young children I would start to amp out about it all.  My priest friend would calmly remind me where the seed bed of ancient Christianity was: Pagan Rome.

This is my next final thought on this topic:  I think this passage from the Summa Theologica helps our thinking on this topic:  “. . . Since the object of love is good, and good is to be found both in substance and in accident, as is clear from Ethic. i, 6, a thing may be loved in two ways; first of all as a subsisting good; and secondly as an accidental or inherent good. That is loved as a subsisting good, which is so loved that we wish well to it. But that which we wish unto another, is loved as an accidental or inherent good: thus knowledge is loved, not that any good may come to it but that it may be possessed. This kind of love has been called by the name “concupiscence” while the first is called “friendship.”“—(S.T:  1, 60, 3)

If you have a trader joe’s in your area, flock there and support them! They do not sell any magazines and their prices are very comparable to our large grocery store’s “deals.” Also, they are very kid-friendly, at least where we are, offering suckers and stickers upon check-out and making nice, appropriate conversation with the kids.

We can try to hold back a tidal wave or we can with the grace of God, navigate it with skill.
@RichardC Michelangelo’s “David” is a *prayer*, and a magnificent one.
My teenaged daughter sketches nudes of both sexes, and I don’t have a problem about this.  We talk about the body, purity for the sake of her future marriage, what it means not to live a “lie” with your body, and how the human body should be celebrated with awe and respect—We talk about it *a lot*. (I remember what it was like to be 19)

One of the best things I have every read of yours, Simcha! Wonderful and encouraging! Well done!

@Simcha, I tried to explain myself yesterday, but they still have me marked as spam, I guess but I’ll try one more time: No matter what cover you look at, you’re looking at obscenities.  Airbrush artists redo every single photo of every single thing you see being advertised: faces, clothes, food, cosmetics, everything.  And they swirl small words over the ads; you need to look in bright light and take your time. 

Look for a slightly lighter “X”; that’s the easiest letter to pick out.  Once you see it, look right next to it and you’ll see: e’s, s’s, f’s, u’s..you get the idea.  Usually one word will go off in one direction and the other will use the same letter and spell something out in the other.  It’s sort of swirly, kwim?

Since sex and death somehow thrill people’s subconscious enough to raise sales (or they wouldn’t be paying all this extra money to put this in, I say it again, everything!), you’ll sometimes see things like tiny skulls in ice cubes, especially in liquor ads.  And, of course, phallic symbols.

But it’s there.  And it’s creepy sick.

I did a little “magazine editing” today! I blocked a Sports Illustrated Swimsuit edition with a magazine about raising chickens. A Cosmo magazine was also blocked with some kind of random decorating/cooking magazine.

Okay everybody, I have a fantastic idea, but I’m afraid I’d have to go to confession afterwards.

For this project, you need a couple of confederates. First person goes to the checkout lines and puts cardboard in front of Cosmo and other gross magazine covers.

Then, at intervals of 10 minutes or so, your friends go through the lines and effusively praise the cashier and store manager for having sensitively concealed the offensive material. Chatter about “shopping here all the time now” and “complimentary letter to the editor” may come in handy.

So that’s it. Am a clever sinner, or just clever? Or just a sinner?

“I remember what it was like to be 19.”  You’re very lucky, anna lisa.  I can’t remember anything.  I’m finding that the elasticity of my brain cells is getting very “stretched out.”  I bet your daughter is very much like you.  But then there’s a host of portraiture demonstrating your blush youth.

I just love this. I agree—no more compromising or explaining.

Well I’ve done a bit of magazine turning and complaining to the manager, too, but the most effective thing ever was to drop a bunch of St. Benedict medals in the racks of “The Book Nook,” a place that had a great selection of newspapers and magazines plus a lot of porn. I expected the place to burn down.  However, within a few months it was sold to a good Catholic woman who got rid of all the porn, all the vulgar cards, and made it a clean, bright, happening place.

No reason why placing sacramentals in the racks and shelves of grocery stores might not have a similar effect.  The battle is the Lord’s.  Let’s do the things that indicate we are looking for Him to intervene.

Hi,
I wanted to let you know the two stores I shop at, Kroger and Publix in Sharpsburg Georgia always have the immoral covers of those magazines covered up with cardboard. However, many times I do not see them at the check out.  They are back where the magazines are sold.  That being said, what I have had to complain about is an inappropriate headline on the cover of The National Enquirer and those are immedately covered as well, as soon as it is brougth to someones attention. 
Thanks and in the spirit of women together, let’s keep fighting the good fight!

I routinely complain about inappropriate magazine displays, and I’m happy to say that I usually get results.

Great column, keep up the good work!

@Matt sometimes I wonder if some of my kids have a lethal double dose of some very uppity genes. 
.
There are a few topics that my husband is banned from in mixed company.  One of them is when I would claim I don’t remember certain details about the past, to which he would reply—“except everything I’ve ever done wrong.”

But judging from the comments, I’m starting to want to live somewhere like Georgia.  I’m astounded that there are big companies out there that have a conscience.  I spend about $1400 in groceries a month. I shop weekly for food in four different stores: Trader Joe’s, Whole Foods, the dollar store, and Safeway or Albertson’s.  Only Safeway and Albertson’s have and display creepy covers.  I’m starting to think that it would be more effective to try to get Trader Joe’s to have a better meat, poultry and fish department than to get the giant companies to stop being smut peddlers.

Amen and amen!  Love your column and your blog.  You are a gem!  God bless you and your family Simcha.

Not saying they don’t exist, but I’ve yet to met a woman who takes Cosmo seriously (a number of their “sex tips” would result in a trip to the emergency room if they were actually tried, and most of the rest wouldn’t be much fun and would probably make you look very very silly…)

And by mixed company you mean: clergy and laity; martians and venusians; men and animals; Dodger fans and Giant fans; greasers and mods; sharks and jets; oxfords, cambridges; Delanos and Roosevelts; Fitzgeralds and Kennedys; trojans, irish; red and black; Montagues, Capulets; mice and men?

I learned through Yahoo News that Ms. Upton now has a Russian look-alike.  They had both photos next to each other…as if once wasn’t enough.  It’s almost literally painful to see these women jettison their self-respect for fame and money.
My recent act of charity was deep-sixing an issue of “Seventeen” from the office that no one in her right mind would think was appropriate for a 17-year-old if she actually bothered to read it.

...And certainly not for any of the younger kids who come in.

I shop at Aldi and I have never once seen an inappropriate magazine.  I highly recommend them, not just for that but also for low prices, fastest checkers ever, and friendly people.  I think they’re owned by the same people as Trader Joe’s.

I saw a BBC article& was just blown away by the sadness of it.I wasn’t sure where to share this, but perhaps this is an appropriate place:

“At least 28% of South African schoolgirls are HIV positive compared with 4% of boys because “sugar daddies” are exploiting them, Health Minister Aaron Motsoaledi has said.”

You can read the full article online at BBC.
I keep repeating myself, but I very seldom see this issue-which also exists in the USA-mentioned.If a clergy member misuses a child it’s frontpage, but apparrently young girls misused by much older men isn’t worth newsprint.Especialy if they’re African, or African American.
Our previous school district had a fulltime position to teach pregnant, middleschool girls between 11 & 15 years old.My son’s homeroom teacher left to fill that position. Invariably the father of the child was an older man.I don’t know what the HIV rates are for school girls in the US, but the exploitation rate, especially in vulnerable communities, is likely similar.Where’s the outrage?

“Our previous school district had a fulltime position to teach pregnant, middleschool girls between 11 & 15 years old.”

“Invariably the father of the child was an older man.”

I think the really remarkable thing, Kathleen, would be if these young girls were impregnated by younger men.

“I spend about $1400 in groceries a month.”

Not to kick a dead horsemeat, but how do you get away with spending so little on food?  We probably spend a thou/month on Mickey D alone.  (They have a kickin play place that serves the dual purposes of kiddie socialization and tranquilization.  It’s also a good spot to hunker down with a McShake and ride moonbeams out onto Rt. 9)  But sincerely, are all your kids, like, birds?

Matt,
How’s your day going?
Years back,we used to shop once every 2 months & the grocery bill averaged around $30.00 per month.That’s when we grew most of what we ate & had milk, eggs,& meat from the farm.If we added the feed costs for the livestock, of course the total expense would be higher.
You can still buy “hog bread” from bakery outlet stores. It usd to run $5.00 for a full shopping buggy of slightly to very stale bakery items which could not legally be sold for human consumption.The really old stuff did go to the hogs & chickens, but often there were perfectly good loaves of bread, doughnuts, etc that we made dressing or bread pudding out of. I also discovered that if you ask stores for old produce for your rabbits, most of it’s perfectly OK for folks to eat.And it’s free.The bunnies profit,too.
I still beg for old produce & such for my chickens ,but these days the hens actually get it all.My household’s shrunk.

It seems however, that there’s still a lot of room in your heart.