Teachers in a Nebraska school district have been told to not refer to children as boys and girls but instead as things like "purple penguins." I don't even know what that means.

Anyway, what would happen if one of the kids insisted they were a red penguin and wouldn't come to story time until the teacher acknowledged the redness of their interior penguin essence? They could say "I may appear to be a purple penguin but in my mind I am very much red. Bright freaking red. Please acknowledge it or you better call your union rep because I'm about to have an army of sensitivity trainers crawling around this kindergarten and contacting the media about how you're anti-penguin."

We'd need metaphorical identity sensitivity training, right?

National Review reports:

A Nebraska school district has instructed its teachers to stop referring to students by “gendered expressions” such as “boys and girls,” and use “gender inclusive” ones such as “purple penguins” instead. “Don’t use phrases such as ‘boys and girls,’ ‘you guys,’ ‘ladies and gentlemen,’ and similarly gendered expressions to get kids’ attention,” instructs a training document given to middle-school teachers at the Lincoln Public Schools. “Create classroom names and then ask all of the ‘purple penguins’ to meet on the rug,” it advises.

Aren't we just making our public schools neuroses factories? It's not enough that they're not adequately teaching math and reading to so many, now they have to confuse children as to their own identity. Who came up with this idea? "Hey, let's not teach children and instead let's just make them question everything about themselves and then tell them the answers are up to them and then when they epically fall on their faces in life we'll just say it's clear we need more funding! C'mon let's implement that plan."

Male and female He created them. Until sensitivity counselors were invented of course.