When I first converted to Christianity, one of the biggest changes in my daily life was saying a prayer before eating. I wasn't used to doing anything other than scooting my chair in and grabbing my napkin before I ate, so it took a while to get into the habit of pausing to address God before I dug into my food. Yet, oddly enough, it felt perfectly natural. Almost all major human celebrations involve food. Even our big secular holidays are associated with celebratory mealtimes (barbecue and pickles on the 4th of July, a feast with blackeyed peas on New Year's Day). It would seem that humans have a natural sense that there's something special about food, and it's no surprise that almost all major religions take special care to offer thanks to the divine for the privilege of eating.
But what is it that makes this particular act so special?
I always enjoy trying to articulate the answers to questions like this, but this one left me stumped. Yes, food is essential to life, but so is water and shelter, and it's not customary to say a prayer before entering your home or taking a sip of a drink. I posed this question to readers of my personal blog years ago, and ended up getting some fascinating replies that have helped me understand just what's so special about the act of gathering around the table. I hated to see such wisdom languishing in the archives, so, in honor of our big American feast day on Thursday, here are some great answers to the question, "What's so sacred about mealtime?"
The dead don't eat
John C. Wright said:
When I converted from Atheism to Christianity, this was one of the easiest of Christian habits for me to pick up. I say grace in restaurants before digging into my Happy Taco meat-flavored food substitute.
Of course, I converted from my sick bed. The Grim Reaper had been standing close by, so to speak, and so the gift of life, and the promise of eternal life, were very near and dear to my heart.
The symbolism appeals to me. The dead do not eat. That is the one thing Homer says about mortal men in his poems: mortals are called ‘men who eat bread’ (as opposed to gods who sup ambrosia and shades who eat nothing).
We remember our lives and give thanks for the source of life when we break bread, and we recall the Bread of Heaven, the manna, which is one of the figures of Christ.
Meals are a natural opportunity for gratitude
Steve G. said:
[The] fact that meals (even when alone) are somewhat regular in interval allows the tying of grace (thanks) to them to be our reminders to periodically say thank you. Just like we have regular morning and evening prayers, we try to build these regular touchstones of prayer into the fabric of our day to help us remember we are in God's presence.
I know that if I didn’t say thank you at grace, and instead just promised to say it ‘every so often’, it’s more likely than not that I’d say it far less often.
Sharing a meal makes us 'companions'
Melanie Bettinelli said:
[The] Eucharist is a meal. For some reason God chooses to come to us in the form of bread and wine.
My husband likes to think of it in this way: God could have created us to be like plants, taking all that we needed from the eath or the air or the sun. But He didn't. Instead he made us beings that need to eat.
Is it possible that He did so for the very reason that one day we might be able to receive Him in the Eucharist?
In many cultures eating a meal with someone has a special significance. In the ancient world often people would not eat with those who were not of their tribe. You see that in the Bible when the Jews refuse to eat with Gentiles. Jesus breaks that rule when He breaks bread with all sorts of undesirables.
I seem to recall hearing stories of cultures in which once you have shared a meal with someone you are bound not to kill them.
The word "companion" literally means someone you have bread with (com = with, pan = bread).
Food becomes part of us
Mike J said:
[It] relates to the Eucharist. In it we take Christ into us and He becomes part of us, as we are being made a part of Him as His Body. Likewise with other food, we take it in and it becomes part of us, and thus part of the body of Christ. Anything that is to become part of the body of Christ should be taken with reverence and should be blessed as it becomes part of Him.
.
I think of these words often. They helped me come to a fuller appreciation of my meals, especially those eaten in community with loved-ones, and have added a new depth to the words we say at mealtime prayer. I hope you find them equally inspiring. Happy Thanksgiving!
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The significance of sharing food with others (as opposed to solitary feeding) is deep in the human condition, it probably goes back to before we became human. Every religion, I can think of, has rituals involving eating - even if it is “only” a form of grace or thanksgiving before eating.
Thank you for the etymology of “companion”, with its connections with solidarity. Saying grace before meals reminds me of those who do not have enough food and my duty to help them.
In recent years the popes have given a special message to the UN Food and Agricultural Organization on World Food Day.
http://www.indcatholicnews.com/news.php?viewStory=19136
http://www.zenit.org/article-35744?l=english
“Give us today our daily bread”.
BBQ & pickles?
We went to Texas over the weekend & were served sliced onions & pickles with our BBQ. First time I’d seen that, but it’s the first time I’d had Texas BBQ, too.
We do blackeyed peas for New Year’s also.
Happy Thanksgiving!
This is very timely. Up until a couple of weeks ago, my husband and I both worked evening shifts opposite each other. Consequently we only had one family dinner together each week (on Sundays). Thankfully my husband was finally able to switch to the day shift, so we now have 5 family dinners each week (I still work two evenings). Even my son notices what an improvement this is. Family dinners add so much to family quality time, and they certainly provide more opportunities for prayer and gratitude.
We are “fearfully and wonderfully made,” just as we consume our Jesus in the Eucharist to grow the life of our souls, so does the act of nourishing our bodies takes on a deeper meaning, sacramental almost. As a mother and grandmother being able to prepare meals takes on an added dimension.
We pray before meals because our Blessed Lord did. Is there a better reason?
Happy Thanksgiving!
It’s one of the coolest parts of being Catholic - that we have normal, human parties connected with every holy day. God works from within us, with the creatures that we are, and transforms that humanity.
We do fondue and shrimp on New Year’s Eve, from the French Canadian tradition. What’s the origin of black-eyed peas?
Ellen ,
Blackeyed peas are for good luck.It’s a Southern tradition to eat them on New Year’s Day along with collards or some other type of greens. The peas represent coins, the greens “folding money” (dollar bills).At least that’s what we were taught.
Rice & blackeyed peas are cooked together to make “Hoppin’ John.”
Blackeyed peas, I think, are originally from Africa & came over with African slaves.I guess the good luck association may originate there,too.
Usually hog jowl, ham hocks,etc are served, also.The idea being if you eat well on New Year’s, you’ll eat the same way through the rest of the year. Also, pork, peas, & greens naturally go well together anyway.
In South Georgia, some black families choose the small, red field peas grown traditionally in the area, instead of blackeyed peas, but it’s the same idea.
“It would seem that humans have a natural sense that there’s something special about food”
Hilarious.
“the promise of eternal life”
You have no evidence of that.
“Instead he made us beings that need to eat.”
Like animals and mammals and great apes. :-)
“Blackeyed peas are for good luck.”
Yet another superstition.
Well, I see that our resident troll is back from his Thanksgiving vacation. Good to see he took some time off for a rare opportunity for some human interaction.
How long has this been going on?
How long has Earl been going on? He started sometime in the past 2-3 months. Originally he posted under the name “JD Hughes”, but the NCR monitors finally blocked him, so he changed his moniker. The monitoring here is so sparse and inconsistent that people like him are able to play their juvenile games to their heart’s content. But if this is his idea of entertainment, and he doesn’t have any sources of genuine entertainment, I guess we really shouldn’t begrudge him.
Hope you had a good Thanksgiving, Bill!
We celebrated Thanksgiving with somewhere between 20-25 of us - 3 adult children, 10 grandkids, 2 great-grands, some spouses and several friends. We sang one verse of “Now thank we all our God” for the grace before meals, before lining up buffet style with youngest served first.
The youngest grandkid & the two great-grands ran around the tables happily for what seemed like hours, and a few falls, but no harm nor tears. Really a blessed late afternoon & early evening. We are blessed that our kids and grandkids seem to get along well with each other.
TeaPot562
Remember when posting that God is listening to all that is said.
‘Earl’, those who don’t see something special about simple things as food, don’t see anything special at all. Life is pointless frivolity.
The evidence of a ‘promise of eternal life’ is historically robust and testified to by witnesses and an oral tradition that was incredibly strong in ancient and times and primitive cultures. Eternal life itself is also evidenced by extraordinary private revelations and miracles unexplained by science. You say ‘evidence’, I say ‘evidence’, neither of us is saying ‘proof’. I say I believe, I don’t say I’ve been there and I know.
What I do know is that my belief leads me to love you and be willing to offer my life for you if it was God’s Will (at the moment I have a family to look after). I may be wrong, but I don’t believe your belief system, if it doesn’t offer eternal life or belief in something beyond ourselves, can offer humanity anything other than distrust, a complex set of contractual arrangements whereby we agree not to backstab each other because we can’t get away with it. Have a look out your window, there’s a lot of it going on. Why don’t you rebel and ask God for faith?
It seems that everything we believe about God and all of our rituals come from tradition. In fact, our lives seem quite meaningless without tradition. The title of this blog, “What’s So Sacred About Meals?” can be answered with one word: “Tradition”. Everyone likes to think that the truth comes from their tradition. For this country, Thanksgiving is the ultimate tradition. That and the Fourth of July (which is more secular). The recent elections seemed to challenge traditional values. I guess what I am saying is that there is a time and a place for tradition and that Thanksgiving provides the best time and place for it. But the same cannot be said for all times and places. We must be sensitive to other people and traditions (or the lack thereof).
To me, food is an addiction. I have no willpower. It seems that the compulsive overeating season begins at Thanksgiving and lasts all through the winter. Food equals warmth and comfort. The words “deny yourself, pick up your cross…” seem to have special meaning when it comes to showing any kind of restraint. Food and drink should be associated with celebration but too much of a good thing can be a real problem.
“Remember when posting that God is listening to all that is said.”
Which one? There are/were many thousands. Or perhaps none at all. And shouldn’t your god be “listening” to what is thought as well as said? Confess the “lust in your heart” (Jimmy Carter)? Hilarious.
“Life is pointless frivolity.”
Yes and no. The species must be propagated. A BCS champion must be crowned. Voters must be convinced - by lying if necessary. Or by appealing to religious dogma.
“The evidence of a ‘promise of eternal life’ is historically robust”
Whose “history”? The one in your book of mythology?
“testified to by witnesses and an oral tradition that was incredibly strong in ancient and times and primitive cultures.”
Irrelevant of course.
“extraordinary private revelations”
Personal anecdotes are not “evidence”. Book of Mormon?
“miracles unexplained by science.”
You are entitled to your opinion. Your belief without evidence.
“if it was God’s Will”
As if someone actually knew what was “God’s Will”. Kill the infidels? And there is this little “problem of evil”.
“can offer humanity anything other than distrust”
Trust is better earned through action, not words.
“a complex set of contractual arrangements whereby we agree not to backstab each other because we can’t get away with it.”
Yes, laws are there for a reason. Sharia? Religion always desires to control other people? Contraception “over the counter”?
“Have a look out your window, there’s a lot of it going on.”
The grass is dying from lack of rain.
“Why don’t you rebel and ask God for faith?”
That would be quite irrational. Besides - which one?
http://www.ncregister.com/blog/jennifer-fulwiler/the-shocking-ethics-behind-the-contraceptive-choice-project/
Two comments from participants pointing out that JF’s opinions are quite wrong.
“As a non-minority, lower-income student at Washington University in St. Louis who participated in the project, I am appalled at some of the reactions to this study. To suggest that there were undertones of ‘eugenics’ in the project setup is completely ridiculous. No one in the study was ‘forced’ to use long-acting contraception, in fact, all types were presented equally as options.”
And ...
“I hope you will educate yourself more on this issue and learn about how much potential this has to help women, ESPECIALLY in under-privileged areas.”
Earl,
You are correct, eating peas for luck is a superstition.
Hope you had a nice Thanksgiving.
“Irrelevant of course”. Yes Earl, pretty much everything you post is irrelevant.
“Each individual is entitled to his or her own religious beliefs… Authority figures teaching America’s youth should not be permitted to say certain things such as any religion being simply ‘wrong’ due to a certain scientific explanation.”
I find it surprising and disturbing that what should be a young inquisitive mind would suggest that a teacher should not be allowed to appeal to science to address a religious question. What if the religious question is about Creationism or some other fundementalist credo?
I had no idea that the concept of Creationism had such a fanatical following. I guess I have been living in a cave.
Sure, if you want to believe the word of a troll.
I don’t understand why Earl’s comment was deleted. To me it seemed informative and inoffensive.
Earl is not capable of posting an inoffensive comment. But you, Bill, are showing your true colors. You’re accusing us of being dishonest, yet you have done a 180 and are now defending a troll. I honestly thought that despite your atheism you had a respect for Catholicism and were here to seek a constructive dialogue from different viewpoints. But it seems that you actually have supported Earl’s juvenile games all along and now want to encourage them.
Check out Fr. Leo’s website “Grace Before Meals” - he really focuses on how good food can bring families, all of us together. Plus there are wonderful recipes and he uses the various feast days to catechize.
Claire: I don’t know if you read the comments that were deleted but they referred to teachers not being able to teach evolution. I am against censorship except under extreme conditions. I don’t agree with NCR on this matter. I’m surprised that you think that Earl’s posts should be deleted. You could always ignore him.
Yes, I did read Earl’s comments about evolution, and , as usual, they were littered with insults toward Christians. If someone comes to a Catholic site and can’t state their points without insulting Catholics, and admits that he is here not for a constructive dialogue, but to “annoy and oppose religion”, then they are not owed a platform. This thread is about the sacredness of meals. It has nothing to do with Evolution, which is widely taught across this country. Earl’s disruption of these NCR threads has gotten out of control and is extreme enough that he should be blocked, and should have been blocked a long time ago. People who come here for a productive discussion should not have to put up with his juvenile game-playing.
As I said on the other thread, I accept your position on the matter. I’m sure earl will re-surface under a new name and everyone will know it’s him. As for this story, a coworker once said to me: “Remember Bill, food is not love”. And without thinking, I immediately responded: “It is to me”. Meals may not be sacred to me, but I sure do enjoy them.
Yes, Bill, I’m sure he will. He has a lot of time on his hands, and until tax season he seems challenged to find productive ways of spending his time, so I’m sure he will come up with a way of posting under a new name and using a new URL address that is not blocked. One thing I will say about Earl is that at least whenever he changes names, he is honest about it unlike Gloria (our other troll). Then again, since he’s a lot older than Gloria, it would stand to reason that he would have a little bit more maturity.
And, I also enjoy meals and wouldn’t say that every meal I experience is sacred.
Dear brother Earl, who won’t trust that I would die for him unless I abandon my family and actually do it, I believe I answered all of your points, but you appear to read only some of the things I write. You denied and asked for evidence (not proof!) and I gave you it. When we die we will find out the answers definitively.
May your creator bless you abundantly with a sincere desire for truth and a little more careful use of language. God Bless.
There really is no purpose in suggesting that you would die for someone like Earl. He doesn’t need anyone to die for him. You might die for your country in military service. You might die trying to save someone from drowning or from a burning building, etc. But a person lacking your faith (such as Earl or myself) is not going to be impressed by hyperbole. Just thought you should know that. I appreciate the sentiment, but I think it is misdirected. Die to protect you wife and kids from an intruder maybe, but it is useless to suggest that you would die for either a believer or a non-believer. That is over the top.
I agree it might be misdirected Bill, but the point I make about dying is actually expressed in terms that make it extremely unlikely to happen. However, the way you rephrase it seems to suggest that I am no more likely to want die for someone than an athiest is i.e. as part of my job, in a panic, or only for someone I know or love. But I have to strongly suggest that you are mistaken. I’m not asking you to believe me personally, but rather understand that you are being presented with an entirely different world view. A true christian sees his life as a means to an end not an end in itself. I pray for my parents, who passed away 2 years ago, every single day. I think of their destiny of life in eternal bliss every day of my life. If it is God’s Will that I should give up my life for a stranger to obtain that never ending life then, you don’t have to call it hyperbole, I really WOULD do it. I would not be giving it up for oblivion, but for something that has been promised me by God who keeps his promises. Thousands of christians have done this for centuries. Their actions weren’t hyperbole. I aim to imitate them.
Why does this matter? Because I want to make clear a genuine christian would play his role in making a better world, even if it cost him his life. And I find an alternative athiest worldview of someone lacking faith has no hope of fixing this world except in very, very small pieces and with methods that often do more damage than good.
I’m sorry to everyone else if this comment is way off topic. I’m new here.
Great selflessness and bravery come from people who believe in life after death. No doubt about it. My belief, by contrast, is nihilistic. My death will be defined by the cessation of brain wave activity at which point I will cease to exist as a person. I don’t choose that as a reality. Of course I would want it to be otherwise. But that would just be wishful thinking that could be exploited, for example, by someone who wants me to do something heroic (including flying a plane into a building). The Crusades would not have happened without this belief. And then there are the martyrs. Promise eternal life and you’d be surprised what you can get people to do. If I were you, I would look to live this life like its the only one you’ll have. Chances are that it is.
Ok Bill. You’ve convinced me. I’d like your advice given my skill set, experience, and that fact that maybe I don’t feel fulfilled enough. Should I start planning to leave my wife and kids if I want to? I’ll do it in secret of course. I’ll ignore what I previously thought and sterilise myself to reduce/prevent any consequences to my sexual liberation.
I’m smarter that Bernard Madoff so I’ve worked out a plan, much better than his, that allows me to ruin other people and get the most out of this life. I always held back on this because I was constrained by the thought of an all-knowing, completely just God and that my actions have eventual consequences I cannot escape. But you’ve liberated me.
I should say ‘thanks’ but why should I? I don’t owe you a thing and never will. You’re a big set of chemical reactions like me, no more. If you cross me I may torture you as an experiment to see what further reactions that might produce. In fact, I’m a really manipulative individual and I might even be able to make more money out my results. I’ve also noticed that your brain wave activity while you’re alive produces displeasing or useless thoughts to quite a few other people (but not me!) so I think I can get financial backing for a plan for your death to be brought forward- within the next year or so. You’re really don’t fit my new criteria, you’re going to have to go. And there are a few governments and NGOs who are really intrigued by these criteria.
Now, you don’t have to dissuade me except out of self-interest. If you do fit my criteria, you don’t have to do a thing. Just keep enjoying the frivolity of life.
Bill, I don’t say any of this in anger or bitterness, but rather it’s ridiculous to suggest that christians should always have to defend their worldview and atheists not defend theirs. Communication is a two-way street. Atheists simply attack all the time. If you seek truth google Catholic Answers.
I know the world I’m creating Bill, and it doesn’t involve flying planes into buildings -and you know it. The real question is- what world are you creating? Is the life I’ve outlined who you want to be or anyone else for that matter? There is a radical choice. The ‘would want it to be otherwise’ you speak of is just a door you don’t knock on.
The Catholic Church has taught extensively on Faith and Reason. Just this week the Pope has spoken of Fideism -belief without reason- as wrong.
You have made a strong argument for continuing to make people like you believe the things that you believe. But you cannot prove any of it to be true. Would you immediately do those things if you were liberated from the threat of eternal punishment? What does that say about you if you are only living a good life because you believe that you will one day be judged? Why not live a good life for its own sake?
I actually continue to practice the Catholic faith despite my doubts. I discuss these doubts with people like you to try to work through them. I have yet to run into someone who can convince me that my doubts are unwarranted. I’m not out to attack anyone’s faith. I am trying to restore my own. I’m glad that the Pope said what he said because it makes perfect sense to me.
Bill, I’ve had to work through quite a few things since my parents’ deaths, both within a five month period. The rest of my family were the same, more or less. “We believe, because we love,” John Henry Newman said. In the context of my parents’ deaths you can say it’s just comforting sentimentality. But in the more expansive worldview I outlined it’s an entirely different matter. ‘All you need is Love’ is what is sung, and deep down I think everyone knows it. Eternal punishment is just one natural climax of our freedom. My understanding of it at the moment is that when we die those who are unwilling to make recompense (in a place of purification) for their sins against others (which they will understand fully) and God (whose greatness in love they will truly comprehend) will prefer Hell, the loss of God. There, logically, they curse God. Logically, they curse love and it’s consequences. That’s what they lived.
Which brings me back to Faith. I believe because I love. I want the world to be a place full of love. If someone obstinately a taker in this life without giving, they know it’s unjust, unloving, and run the risk (it’s not my place but God’s to decide) that they will detest God’s perfect justice in the end and choose Hell. For those who do the natural thing and love, eternal punishment causes no anxiety. For those who try do avoid loving, it causes anxiety and rightly so. That’s God’s loving purpose for it.
You say ‘why not live a good life for it’s own sake?’ That would be nice I agree, but show me such a person and we’ll find they live by faith of some sort. Faith in Justice, Peace, Truth. All of these come from God. But God knew this first, and it’s in the Bible. “The just man shall live by faith” (Hb 2,4). You think such a life is plausible precisely because you have faith. Those without faith live lives as my previous comment outlined. Choose once and for all Bill. Stop choosing doubt. I did but now I try earnestly to live by faith, by loving.
I understand what you are saying but where is the scientific proof? Don’t you think science should be able to explain just about everything by now? Even what happens when we die? The concepts on which you are relying are taken from primitive folklore that has long been replaced by modern physiology, psychology, biology, philosophy, etc.
Instead of me arguing with you, I recommend this: develop an alternate world view in which there is no supernatural anything. Work out your whole outlook on everything based on this alternate world view. Then compare the two of them and choose one to live by. Maybe you have already done that.
Now I think you must be kidding me. Ask yourself your own questions. I don’t use proof for everything any more than I’d ask my wife to prove it when she phones me and says the dinner’s ready. I would take a random guess and say that 95% of my day or more is based on trusting others. For bigger questions I still trust others. I believe the Sun is a big fiery star not because I’ve been there but because I trust the guys who know these things.
I don’t believe you’re seriously considering my points. If you are, then I’ve left my wife, am sterilised, about to pull off the greatest financial scam of all time. All because you’re not reading what I’m writing. Thanks for the debate. I’d be grateful if you read over my points I spent valuable time making.
Why do you think I haven’t read every word? I read some of it twice. There’s nothing wrong with trust under normal circumstances. But I need proof for your concept of eternal punishment. I lost my parents too. To me they are not in heaven or hell. They just no longer exist except as memories. I suspect that you would find it hard to accept that the best of us and the worst of us face the same fate. We all just cease to exist when we die. Your response is that you should leave your wife, etc. Well do what you want if that’s the only thing holding you back. We really can’t debate this. You believe in eternal life and I don’t. Neither of us can prove our point.
Fr.Robert Spitzer’s videos provide quite rigorous scientific proof of God’s existence (see http://magisreasonfaith.org/). The chances of us existing without a God are ludicrous in his scientific opinion, as a scientist. And he is most definitely not alone. On the other hand Jennifer Fulwiler has said she read Richard Dawkin’s God Delusion and laughed out loud at some points.
After visiting the aforementioned site and reviewing all of the scientific videos that I’m sure you’ll enjoy, you will have your proof you sincerely seek. If it’s not that simple, you are now faced with choosing between competing scientific claims and you’ll have to choose between scientific proof that justifies the despair and desperation of many (including Hitler and Stalin and the murderous leaders of North Korea and China) and the scientific proof that leads you to join people like Mother Theresa and millions of others living a life of service and hope, believing themselves to be assured Heaven as they are doing as their Saviour commanded them. (“I call you friends if you do as I command you”) They wouldn’t be able to operate in the slums of India on a daily basis, nor would I be able to look after my family, if we worried about Hell. Our Lords commands us not to worry. I don’t. I get on with loving.
Why don’t you get on with watching the videos? If God exists, He created the Universe for us, giving us eternal life isn’t so hard is it? But He’s also Just, so I’ve explained all that. This is as far as I can go I’m afraid. Perhaps real dialogue with someone else can supplement the videos. I would suggest a priest of Opus Dei, purely because I know some and they will give you the time, are kindly and charitable, and very knowledgeable. If you’re sincerely seeking Truth and want to meet you parents again, then give it a go. What is there to lose? Best wishes, I’ll pray for you Bill.
Adrian: It’s good to hear from you again. Although we don’t agree, I do enjoy our discussions. There is one very important point I want to make. It matters very little what I believe. I am not in any way damned by believing what I currently believe. Yes, it is important to believe what’s true. But there are no grave consequences going one way or the other. I don’t gain eternal life by believing in eternal life. I don’t assure my own annihilation by not believing in eternal life. I have no fear that by believing the wrong thing I face some sort of dire consequences in the end. That belief has been pushed on people for the sole purpose of spreading the faith. Richard Dawkins invented a word for it. It’s called a meme. It’s like a gene that replicates itself by its very nature. It spreads like a virus. So don’t try to tell me that I should believe something for the salvation of my soul. Again, what I believe has little impact on reality.
So okay I will check out the references that you gave me. Thanks.
“The chances of us existing without a God are ludicrous in his scientific opinion, as a scientist.”
Hilarious.
Earl,
Where have you been? I was just talking about you.
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