I pray before meals in public & I can empathize with the fear that comes from being perceived as pushy, self-righteous, etc.  About a month ago, as I was getting ready to leave a restaurant after a meal with my wife, a man walked up to me & said, “I want to thank you for your public display of faith.  Not many people do that today.”  It can be a wonderfully quiet moment of evangelization because God can use all things, no matter how small.  I pray for Jesus to dispel my fear because there’s only one person who really doesn’t want me praying in public…

Jennifer, my family and I do pray in public at restaurants. We haven’t always done so, but as our kids have gotten older, we have made a conscious effort to always do so. We don’t do it to try to be super holy, but instead because it is just what we do. Since we pray at home, why not do it in public? We haven’t gotten any comments or looks, either positive or negative, but even if we did, that wouldn’t stop us. Maybe the fact that we live in an a city with a large number of Catholics (San Antonio, TX) makes us less conspicious, but I say go for it!

One time I was having lunch on base in uniform (I’m retired from the AF), and stopped to pray. An older couple sitting near me told me that they thought it was wonderful to see me stopping to pray before eating, epseciall in the middle of a crowded food court and in uniform.

As far as praying at the home of someone who wasn’t a Christian, that’s a tough one. I think we would ultimately do what you and your husband did, and just bow our heads in silent prayer.

Both my husband and I have been practicing Catholics all our lives, so perhaps this comes more “naturally” to us, but I’ve never thought twice about praying in a restaurant.  If I’m out with my husband or another family member, we bow our heads, cross ourselves and quietly speak a prayer of thanksgiving to the Lord.  When out with non-Christians or at someone’s home, my husband and I will still cross ourselves with a brief and silent prayer.  I feel that to NOT pray would be to deny both ourselves and our Savior - which we know that the Scriptures warn us against.

On this note, one of Padre Pio’s “spiritual children” relayed the story of driving past a church with an atheist friend.  Out of embarrassment because of his friend’s presence, he did not acknowledge the Lord as he normally would - and he suddenly heard a loud shout of, “Coward!”  When he next saw Padre Pio at San Giovanni Rotondo, Padre Pio’s greeting to him was, “This time, you got a warning.  Next time, you’ll get your ears boxed.”

My family and I always pray before a meal no matter where we are.  If together at a restaurant, we pray aloud ( not too loud, but as we would normally talk)...if at a non christians house, we pray alone silently ( but we do not begin to eat unless we have prayed).
We live in the Bible Belt and do get looks when we pray in public, mainly with the Sign of the Cross ( which I used to be very self conscious of, but learned not to be once I realized it was the best prayer in itself).  One time we had a group of 12 go out to dinner after Mass and the entire restaurant fell silent when we prayed the table blessing, which our priest led.  It was beautiful.  It wasn’t done to be ” Holier than Thou”, it was done because it is what we do as Catholics.  Most people do not have a problem with it. 
I do have protestant friends who do not like our ” prepared prayers” , like the table blessing, they feel it should be spontaneous and not memorized.  So one time ( while out to dinner with our friends) my son offered to pray the prayer and be ‘spontaneous’...he proceeded to pray the table blessing in Latin.  :-)  Which they thought was Beautiful!

Several months ago, my now husband of two and a half weeks and I went to a dinner theatre to celebrate his birthday. We shared our table with another, older couple. My husband is really good about praying in public, and has pushed me in an area I once struggled with.

At the table, we made the sign of the before starting on our salads, and prayed a brief prayer.  When we looked up, the couple finished the sign of the cross as well.  They were Catholics, and had been married for 50+ years.  We shared a dinner of wonderful conversation as they gave us “tips” for our upcoming marriage.  In fact, their son was a missionary in El Salvador, where my husband has lead mission trips multiple times.

Had we not prayed, we probably never would have gotten deeper in conversation than “how are you?” and “where do you live?”  Sometimes, the Holy Spirit works in mysterious ways.

This has given me courage to be more bold in praying before meals in public.

We always pray before meals at home with our 6 children.Why should we stop just because we are in a restaurant.Just for the record I am English and my wife is German so it is nothing to do with the “genes” as Jennifer claims!

When I go out to eat during the week, I am going to tell you that I just bob nod my head, use my inside voice and say a cut and dry “Thank you God amen done, said with a southern accent.” done. That is all I say. I tis not a long winded get on my knees overdone in a public restaurant while I wear a hair shirt and beat myself while I have a para liturgical service. 

You may something different but in Florida, we just get it done. Thank you God I love this food amen.  If you disagree,  sorry but you have gay marriage in NY.  There are bigger fish to fry

We do pray in public and at the homes of others who do not share our faith. Catholicity is part of our being, so at the homes of friends and relatives, we put any potential discomfort behind our focus on who we are in the Lord. Even my mother, a non-Catholic, joins us in the prayer before meals, which is something that never happened at my childhood table.  My husband and in-laws, lifelong faithful Catholics, are the quiet prayers in public, but our little family (and children) has helped them be more open in public expressions of faith.  Noone has given us negative feedback, but I am occasionally thanked by others for being true to faith and modeling humility to a new generation. It’s quite a compliment that I don’t often live up to, but a good reminder to to keep at it.

Always, always, always!  I usually have my children with me when I am out, so I always pray when we eat out or are at a friend’s house because I know that they are watching and learning.  It is so important to teach them to “pray without ceasing” regardless of where they are and who they are with.  I never want them to be ashamed or fearful to live their Faith. That means that I cannot be afraid to live mine as well.  We also acknowledge the Lord every time we pass a Catholic church regardless of who is in our car or whose car we are in. I never notice if we get any looks, good or bad, from folks because I intentionally block them out and focus on the prayer and my kids.  And I don’t worry about whether or not it makes them uncomfortable.  Actually, I figure that if it makes them uncomfortable, it is probably for a good reason and maybe they can go home and discern why it made them feel that way.  I know that during the less than holy years of my life, seeing acts of faith and being around holy people made me feel uncomfortable, but I realize that it wasn’t their faith and display of it that made me feel that way.  It was my unholiness that made me feel uncomfortable!  And I changed!  So, your silent witness (public display of faith) may very well be the little thing that turns someone’s world around for the better! God Bless! :)

Jennifer,  I just appreciate that you acknowledge the social reticence of people with English AND German heritage.  My problem is that I married into a family of rowdy Irish. They end each meal with a clamorous version of Johnny Appleseed’s grace (you know, “Oh, the Lord is good to me, and so I thank the Lord. .. “). 
Thankfully not in public.

Do we pray openly at restaurants?  Sometimes.  My husband is better at that than I am, and we tend to do it more often if our kids are with us than if they are not.  Part of this is because going out to eat is outside our normal routine, so being cognizant of when to say a blessing is not quite on our radar.  Part of it (for me) is that I feel the same way you do—slightly awkward at openly praying around others who are likely not practicing Christians, slightly guilty for possibly appearing “holier than thou.”

As for praying at the home of a non-Christian ... honestly, I can’t say I’ve been in that situation yet.  (We truly don’t know many non-Christians; if we do, we don’t know them well enough that we’d be invited to their homes for dinner.)

But perhaps the touchiest situation is at gatherings of extended family where there are some practicing Catholics, some fallen-away Catholics, some Mormons, some Evangelicals or Fundamentalists or non-denominationalists (including some who are very anti-Catholic), and some agnostics.  Because the family’s religious tradition is Catholic (and very German to boot!), prayers and the sign of the cross are usually said before meals (depending on who’s hosting).  However, this is probably the most uncomfortable of all other scenarios because of the family dynamic.

I’m very reserved, and so overt religious displays at restaurants are very difficult for me. That being said, I do pray aloud when I go out to eat. If I’m in a non-religious home that knows my crazy religious proclivities (my in-laws, for instance) I pray aloud. If it’s a non-religious home that isn’t well known to me, I pray silently, figuring that it falls into the realm of good manners not to make people I don’t know and who don’t know me well terribly uncomfortable.

My wife and I regularly pray at restaurants. I always feel a little conspicuous, but I wouldn’t feel like I was being true to my religious convictions if I wasn’t open about being Catholic. Praying before meals is just part of what being Catholic is about. And it probably does provide a good witness. As far as praying before meals in a group of friends, I usually don’t, but feel guilty about not doing so. That is probably an area where I need some growth. Thanks for your post. It has made me think more deeply about this subject.

My daughter who is Catholic married a Southern Baptist who really has no faith tradition or beliefs.  When we go to their house for dinner, we pray both a “Catholic” prayer and a “Protestant” prayer because of his prejudice against our daughter’s Catholic faith.  I pray in public before we eat and we pray in all people’s homes before we eat.

Living in the South, I suppose thanksgiving before meals could be - and likely is - considered a birthright, of sorts. When I was Protestant, it never occurred to me to not express thanks at any meal, whether in public or private, and as a Catholic now, I am even more keenly aware of my Constitutionally-guaranteed rights. It has never occurred to me that my practice was, or could be construed as anything other than my own personally intimate moment with my Maker. Folks kiss, hold hands and exhibit other public displays of affection with children, friends or family, and so I cannot perceive how my public display of gratitude harms or offends anyone. When friends have accompanied me to a meal - when they have eaten - I have said, “excuse me just a moment, please,” bow my head, make the sign of the cross, and pray silently. No one has ever seemed to mind. When dining in public with my Catholic friends, we all bow our heads, make the sign of the cross and pray. For me, it’s a natural outpouring of who I am.

I will make the sign of the cross if I am walking or driving by a church, or if an emergency vehicle pass by, and I won’t care who is there. However, I feel kind of self-conscious in a group. My sisters are no longer Catholic. The two older ones are now Presybterian and my younger sister seems to be some form of atheist-humanist. Everytime we get together at the table for a family dinner all of them stop what they are doing and look at me to start the prayer, including the atheist-humanist. It’s kind of funny that they rely on the one person who stayed faithfully Catholic to help them pray.

We have a set prayer that we always say before meals so that the kids can recite it with us. My kids won’t eat until that prayer is said. So, yeah we always pray before meals wherever we happen to be. We’re not shouting it out or intentionally making a spectacle of ourselves, but we all feel it necessary to thank the Lord before we eat. I think that so long as youre not being obnoxious then you shouldn’t worry about what others might think. There is a big difference between practicing and expressing your faith and intentionally shoving it in someone’s face.  I’ve found that most people- even atheists- can tell the difference.

Do we pray over our food at restaurants?  Yes, and without selfconsciousness in general, but with a single overarching qualification.  I find it impossible to pray over food when we are sharing a meal with my parents, who have various levels of overt hostility to religious practices. This situation is complicated, and extremely intimidating for us, we aren’t even comfortable praying over dinner in our own home when they’re visiting.

Considering the genetically modified foods that find their way to our plates.. it is not only wise to pray before meals…but it might even be prudent to make the Sign of The Cross OVER the food.
“If you deny me before men..I will deny you before The Father”

We pray with the family at restaurants, but I too feel very conspicuous about it. I admit that if it weren’t for my kids saying, “We forgot to pray!”, that I am be tempted to skip it. At a dinner party, I would make the sign of the cross and say a silent prayer. I feel a dinner party is a “public” event because it’s not just your family, so there’s no need to say an out loud prayer. I remember my mom always saying, “It’s time for a little QP”. (quiet prayer):)

Regarding that genetically altered food thing.  Caveat emptor. What you eat is up to you.  How much fat do you eat?  What do you look like?  That’s just as much thank you to God for NOT RUINING THE BODY HE GAVE YOU.

I will tell you a true story about saying grace in public. My husband and son went to a restaurant together, and when the meal arrived they made the sign of the cross and said grace.  A man who had been staring at them the whole time walked over and introduced himself.  He told my son that he was fortunate to have a father who set the right example.  The man then felt compelled to pour out his story to my husband. The man’s brother, who was a man of strong faith in God, had recently passed away. The family was Muslim, but had grown away from God.  They were so distraught at the brother’s passing that they were all considering suicide. My husband and son’s simple public act reminded him of God, and after talking with my husband he felt better about the death and, at least for that day, had enough hope for the future that he was going to go home and tell his family that things were going to be okay. Prayer in public is an invitation to others to reflect on God. You aren’t forcing them to pray, you are simply reminding them that they can.

The extremely rare times we are able to eat out we have been more conscience to say “grace” before meals.  To be honest, we are MORE likely to remember to pray when we are with our kids and often times it will be they who will remind us.  For them, it’s a natural carry over since we always say grace before emals at home.

I am 64 years old and I have always prayed in public except for a few years in my early 20s. When eating by myself in restaurants I make the Sign of the Cross and pray silently. When we took our children, and now grandchildren, to eat we would all make the Sign of the Cross and then pray aloud so that the children could know and follow what we were doing.
I sometimes pray my daily rosary during the day. If I need to enter a super market, post office, etc. while praying the rosary, I do so while carrying my rosary beads. If I positively affect others then I thank God that He used me as an instrument of His love. If anyone is offended - well, that is their problem. Matt.10:33 says something to the effect that “If you deny Me before men, I will deny you before My Heavenly Father.”
I would hope to have the courage to publicly proclaim my faith even if I was challenged with a gun to my head. That requires special grace for which I pray that God would provide me.
Your non-believing friends don’t modify their behavior in your presence. Why should you modify your behavior in front of them?

We always pray before meals in public.  Sometimes the people at other tables see us and remember to pray.  We’ve never had sneers or accusations.

Just pray in a natural tone, don’t think about what others are thinking. :-)

Hubby and I always say blessing before meal when out alone.  With others we hold handsomest table, bow heads and say blessing silently.  When entertaining at home, we ALWAYS say the blessing and thank God for the opportunity we have to enjoy the meal with our friends, no matter their faith traditions or lack thereof.  When in others’ homes we play it by ear - if they are Catholic, we lead.blessing aloud. If not, we bow heads and say private blessing.

We consider it as giving witness in addition to thanking God and hope it will inspire others to do likewise - preach always and if necessary, use words.  :)

We do pray in restaurants and my sons and I cross ourselves when we hear sirens of emergency vehicles. Where I feel most strange is at work. I work for a Protestant organization so there is regularly prayer to open meetings. I have never crossed myself (though it’s so automatic an impulse that I sometimes have my hand half way up without realizing it) out of fear of being—passively-agressively preachy? Sort of “Look here - I’m a different sort of Christian than you are”. It has felt like calling attention to myself in a bad way. But I rethink this CONSTANTLY. Maybe I should just do it? They know I’m Catholic! ACK. No idea how to handle this really.

strangely, it was the overt religiousness of my moslem friends that called me to question my own routines. usually i would hesitate to show off my catholicism out of deference to others…but they never hide their faith…look at their dress! now i cross myself in every food place and hope someone who , like me before, needed to see that…after all, we are here to be a light for one another..jew or gentile….

I never really thought about the “social awkwardness”. I usually pray before a meal, anywhere, a restaurant, home, at work..and have never had an issue. And I always make the sign of the Cross when I pray so it’s not like it’s “stealth praying”. I guess it also depends where you live and work. I would say that most people I work with are nominal Christians and they probably notice when I pray. One Pentecostal lady told me she noticed I pray the Rosary often (I keep it under my desk) and everyone knows I’m Catholic. As long as you’re not trying to call attention to yourself I think public praying is fine and actually commendable. I couldn’t imagine not saying my prayers because of those around me,  just never really thought about it.

We do, aloud and as a result, sometimes we get odd looks.  I solve that by keeping my eyes closed.  At business dinners, I pray visibly (sign of the cross and bowed head) before meals.  I feel wakward wehen I do not pray before meals.  My challenge has been to develop the discipline to pray a thanksgiving after—can’t seem to get that habit! My office, by the way, is decidedly Catholic—I have a holy waer stoup and I pray for my workday when I arrive, and often spend my break walking and praying my rosary, which is otherwise lying openly on my desk.  People around me know I am CAtholic and often ask for prayers.  I am not naturally demonstrative, but I have found that this (praying in public) comes easier and easier.  I even managed a spontaneous hug and prayer for a despondent friend who had just learned of a cancer diagnosis in the middle of the hall—way past my comfort zone, usually, but it happened.  The SPirit works in me in spite of me sometimes, and where I notice that is in prayer.

I’m a college student, and whenever my Catholic friends and I go out to eat, we’ll always cross ourselves and say grace. If we’re in a mixed group, we’ll cross ourselves and say it silently. But if I’m with a friend who isn’t religious, I won’t cross myself, and I’ll pray the way you and your husband did. So it’s definitely situational, but when I consider what to do, it’s more out of concern for the comfort of others, rather than the fear that someone will think I’m a holy-rolling freak.

I was praying in a restaurant with an evangelical friend who puts up with, but doesn’t buy into, my Catholic beliefs and practices. When our food came, I did a self-conscious mini-Sign-of-the Cross. He called me on it and said, “Come on, man, that’s your prayer, do it properly!”

For family dinners out, we typically pray more openly so that all can participate.  However, when out with a bunch of atheists and agnostics for a business lunch, I will just silently bown my head for a quick prayer and usually neglect the sign of the cross.

Yes, we do. Always. But I do feel a bit conspicuous in doing so! These days, honestly, my fear is that someone will come out of nowhere and lay their rant against the Catholic Church on us (sigh). But I do so because I know we are called to witness and this is one small part of that.  The response, however, has been clearly positive, especially when we are w/ our children. Someone will stop by and say a kind word.  When at someone else’s home, usually we all pray together anyway, but I would certainly follow the lead of the host. Given that we have small children, we can’t be in someone’s home that would be THAT hostile to our practices anyway, so it hasn’t come up with us.

My husband and I push through whatever awkward situations come, though I commiserate with the feeling.  This post has inspired me as it has brought me to consider that if all of us feel at all ashamed over something as trivial as making a sign of the cross and saying a quick prayer in public, how much more will we feel awkward, “self-righteous,” and pietistic when it comes to standing up for the truly controversial and consequential in our society?  Too awkward to stand in front of an abortion clinic for the unborn?  Is it too showy to calmly explain the definition and sanctity of marriage?  What about confronting an abuse concerning the Eucharist?  It’s the venial failures to witness that stealthily inform our inaction in matters of mortal consequence.

RE: the thought of praying over genetically modified foods to make them healthy for you reminded me of this [funny] video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4t0mtMmYa4o

I tend to pray before meals in public. If I’m alone it’s a silent prayer starting and ending with the sign of the cross. If I’m with other Catholics there is dialogue of “do you want to pray?” and then we prayer softly together.

I did not always pray in public until one year our pastor asked the parish if they hid their faith or if they practised it openly. He spoke of having religious items in our homes, wearing religious medals, and saying grace before meals when eating out. From then on we said grace   when eating out. There may come the day when to pray openly is not allowed. Who knows what the future holds—we may be accused of making others “uncomfortable”. So we no longer hesitate, we make the sign of the cross and say our grace before meals.

I pray before meals in public.  I don’t think you have to worry about appearing “holier art thou” because that is not how you live your life. We pray to give thanks to God, not to be a side show.
As a family, we pray out loud. If I am by myself, I make the sign of the cross and then pray silently. 
We also pray whenever we hear a siren. Once when I was at an office supply store that faced a busy street, an ambulance came racing by with sirens blaring.  My youngest, then three, tugged at my arm and yelled “Mommy PRAY!” And started in on the Hail Mary.  So, thanks to my chilren I do not have any embarrasment about praying in public.

Just yesterday State Trooper Brian (just met him during this encounter) saw me sitting on a bench outside a local natural foods grocery store where I was waiting for my daughter (I must have been looking rather sickly). He asked if I was “OK” and I told him I had just been to the doctor for a difficult illness. “Please remember me in your prayers, I commented off-handedly at the end or our idle talk. “I’d like to pray with you now. May I?” the State Trooper asked.

We prayed together and he went his way. We have much to learn from our “Evangelical” brethren. I figured he was an “Evan” as our Evangelical friends like to say, by the way he prayed.

In another incident, I was at the zoo years ago, when it was time for my family’s picnic lunch. So…my children and I sat down, made the sign of the cross, prayed our meal prayer, and ate our lunch! The other mom with us sat nearby and proceeded to unpack her kids lunch. Over time this resulted in her whole family becoming Christian (not Catholic yet) her husband having a vasectomy reversed, and them having 3 more children! And now they are in ministry!

BE NOT AFRAID! You too might lead someone to Christ in inadvertently just by saying your meal prayer in public!

We always pray aloud no matter who’s around.  If we are at a non-catholic friends home we do it anyway.  My husband is a very boisterous Catholic prescence.  Even our Catholic friends and families find him on the extremely Catholic side.  Our faith colors every part of our lives and every decision we make so public displays of faith (praying before meals) is the least of our Catholic devotions.  The Bible even tells us “And all that will live godly in Christ Jesus, shall suffer persecution.” (2 Timothy 3:12)  Why would you think that would be different for you? We are called by God to evangelize our one true faith.  It may not always be comfortable but it is always called for.  In America we truly have nothing to fear.  Catholics in other parts of the world are dying everyday for their faith and we are scared to make other’s uncomfortable or make ourselves stand out?  That’s almost laughable when you really think about it.  We are all called to stand up for our Catholic faith, and stand out as different because we are.  We know the secret of how to get to Heaven.  It’s our choice whether to follow his narrow way and suffer here or to take the easy way and suffer eternally.  We are all called to be saints because sainthood is sharing in the glory of God forever.  Even when we fall He gives us the gift of confession so He can reconcile us to himself.  I dare not deny knowlage of him in non-Catholic circles for fear that he will deny knowing me in front of his father.  Sorry if I was a bit harsh but it’s true isn’t it?

I usually say grace quietly and cross myself.  I don’t make a huge Bridey-esque display; I just say my little prayer because it’s what I do!  I’m not trying to prove anything.  There have been a number of times when people asked me about Catholic beliefs because of this, and we had a nice, friendly discussion about religion.

Seriously, if you’re afraid that people will judge you for saying grace, don’t worry.  Polite people, people of good will, are not going to take offense.  Think about it: would you be all disgusted if your Jewish friend said a blessing over her food?  Let’s be cheerful and assume the best of people.

Yes, I pray in public before I eat.  I have taught my grandchildren this little prayer, “Rub a dub dub, thank the Lord for the grub and God bless the cook and ....”  my grandkids love it.

We always pray before meals, whether at home or in restaurants. At the dinner party-type event you describe, I might just bow my head and pray. However, our kids are conditioned to pray before eating, so if they’re along they have no hesitation at all. Children’s simplicity is beautiful!

John wrote: “As far as praying at the home of someone who wasn’t a Christian, that’s a tough one.” I don’t think it’s tough at all. In fact, I would be offended if those who invited my wife and I to dinner expected us to leave our faith at the door. Surely anyone who would do such a thing cannot be a true friend, right? We cross ourselves and say grace whether it’s in a restaurant, at home, or as guests in someone else’s house, and no one’s ever complained.

Jeanne in Florida - Don’t be rude!

A slightly different practice: I sometimes pray the Divine Office (in silence) while travelling by train here in the UK and make the sign of the cross where required by the rubrics.  Sometimes I’ll limit myself to the sign just at the beginning and end, but either way, I’ve never had funny looks and it must be obvious that my leather-bound breviary with it’s ribbon markers and black and red text is a bit Catholic.  A couple of times fellow passengers have asked well-intentioned questions about the Breviary.  As I live in a multi-cultural city where members of other religions are more visibly practicing that most Christians, I’m starting to regard it as a duty to be at least unashamed of my (albeit wretchedly poor) devotion.

Didn’t read all of the posts but my public prayers include making the Sign of the Cross when passing a Catholic Church to acknowledge Christ as my Savior and never feel embarrassed but I am in that group who do not say grace in public.  Just a bad habit not to do so.  When I think to - I do bow my head and say grace in public.  Today I said the Rosary while walking in the street here in bad old NYC and did notice one woman look.  It wasn’t a negative look.  Hopefully, she positively impressed.  I believe we should ‘show our Faith’ in public for our own benefit and for those who observe.  My small crucifix is always evident around my neck.  If we love Christ we should show it to the best of our ability.
Mary D.

We live in Seattle, one of the most unchurched—and perhaps antichurch—areas of the country.  We pray in restaurants and have a “Pray for our priests” bumper sticker.  We might have our tires slashed for that someday, and we sometimes get weird looks when we pray at restaurants, but neither of those is the weirdest thing we do (compared with those who live around us), so I don’t pay too much attention. We get more dirty looks for the fact that I’m pregnant with #4—NUMBER FOUR!!  And we already have 2 girls and a boy!  What are we thinking!—and now that I’m six weeks from our due date, it’s not something that’s easy to be discreet about.  I imagine that some people write us off as crazy, others are annoyed, others are intrigued, and some just don’t pay any attention.  I guess, since this happens in so many different things we do in our lives, that I don’t think about it that much any more.

Monica, were you eating at the Odd Fellow’s Lounge in Seattle last Saturday? I saw a family praying before eating while I was there and was really moved. You are right about Seattle being non-church-y, in that Saturday marks the only time I have ever seen anyone pray in public there. I am in my early 20’s and my fiancee and I hardly ever pray together at meal times, unless it is a special occasion. Of course, we aren’t married yet, and don’t eat all our meals together. Neither of us were raised as church goers (he was in a Christmas and Easter mass type family and mine was a Christmas and Easter Unitarian praise the goddess type family :)) and it is difficult to get into the swing of things now, it feels like I’m faking it or being a holy roller. I wonder if Jennifer or other non-Cradle Catholics felt/feel similarly. I guess I might fake it until I make it.

I have always struggled with praying in public, but I can see why it has been a struggle. After I left primary school, I was thrown in a secular school setting that ruined me. I basically gave up public prayers for fear of being ridiculed by my peers. It stunted my spiritual growth significantly to the point where I even mocked people who showed some short of devotion or spiritual maturity i.e. virtue.

After I suffered from almost 10 years of not living my faith, I came back to the Church fully loaded. Well, not at first. See, I tried to be quiet about my conversion, but the more I was quiet, the more I was put quiet forcefully in the proximate occasion of sin by my clueless friends who were pretty godless. Needless to say, I lapsed into a state of denial that said I could really be a cool friend to these people without losing my soul. I was wrong. It soon became evident to me that to be respected and to challenge the authentic friendship of these people, I ought to show them who I was. It was then I started to wear a crucifix around my neck and dressed differently. Of course I was ridiculed, but at least when I put my hand up to cross myself in public, it was almost expected that I would do that. I didn’t have to hid anymore. With time, I lost a good number of friends, but I picked up many more along the way.

I don’t wear my crucifix on the outside anymore, but now I am well versed in manipulating conversations so that they don’t get out of hand and even excusing myself at the right time to avoid being in questionable company.

When it’s time to eat, I sign myself and carry on, just as I would, and don’t let pride dictate that I ought not be reverent before God lest I be looked down upon by men.

Silent prayer is great, but with the visible sign of the cross, it’s a beautiful way of crucifying oneself in public for the sake of something bigger.

I’ll say a brief silent prayer and cross myself. Nothing dramatic. Frankly, I think most people are too preoccpied with their own concerns to pay much attention to little Catholic me.  :)

Reply to Monica
When hubby and I stroll the streets of our City, NYC, I speak to parents of babies in carriages and parents with older children.  I always include something like - you have a wonderful family and end with enjoy them and God bless.  I believe families have to know they are needed and much loved.  Hubby said I always bring a smile to their faces.  We are the parents of only one son (32 yrs old just engaged) by chance and not choice.  And may I end with, God bless you Monica, hubby and wonderful family.
Mary D.

Just slightly off-topic: How a convert reconsidered his position on “canned prayer” while giving thanks for his food. http://thecontemplativecatholicconvert.blogspot.com/2011/07/can-canned-prayers-be-spiritual.html

Feeling awkward is not bad.  That seems to go along with most things that stick out from the status quo.  But prayer is still different that just wearing bright yellow shoes which definitely stand out.  Prayer is also intimacy with God.  I suspect your body reacts in awkwardness because your soul is trying to bear herself before God.  And so we blush, or feel awkward.

How to go about praying in public?  I would say with naturalness.

My friend Greg and I were between rounds at a chess tournament and went to McDonalds for a bite.  We received out meal and went to our booth where we commenced to pray in a moderately low tone.  After we finished, a nearby man came to us in somewhat of a disturbed state and said his uncle Ron had just died.  He asked us to pray for Ron.  We assured him we would but commented that God would hear his prayers too.  God uses our good deeds to accomplish His purpose.  Let God use you, you won’t be sorry.

Another great column, Jennifer.  I love your transparency.  My husband Tripp and I had a born again experience in 1987 and so had 20 years of evangelicalism behind us when we became Catholics nearly four years ago.  We do make it a practice to pray over meals - which means reciting grace together - which means quite a clamor if there are many members of the family out for dinner.

But if we slip up and forget, our kids are the Grace Patrol and remind us.  Even if we go through the drive-thru to catch a meal on the run, we have to say grace.

Manners are about making others more comfortable and showing respect. Since vocal prayer requires everyone to stop and be quiet I have taught my kids to pray silently if they are at a table where prayer isn’t common, or if they have come late to our table. God still comes first, but we are also not asking others to make our values their own. We have taught them that the sign of the cross is not disruptive and a good indicator that you are praying and not sick or something else. So that is how we’ve handled it so far. Yes, pray, yes do the sign of the cross, no don’t start praising and thanking God in a manner that makes those you are with feel uncomfortable and puts you at the center of attention. Modesty can even be useful in prayers.

I am a bit of a bombastic personality and I mentioned it to a priest some years ago with the thought that maybe I should be a bit less outgoing about my Catholic Faith.  He said that the Lord did not want me to hide my light under a bushel and I have used that as my guidance ever since.  I agree one should not shout out prayers in a restaurant or diner but remember the early martyrs and certainly not with Christ as He taught were silent.  I am a lifelong Catholic and proud and loud about it.  When on the streets of NYC I am approached (and often lately) by young adults trying to promote Planned Parenthood.  I tell them the horrors of abortion and ask them to pray with me.  None do but that doesn’t stop me.  Bombastic Mary

Ask yourself this question, “What would Jesus do?” The answer, at least to me, is fairly obvious.

I began publicly blessing my food in high school after the protestant girl (I greatly admired for her faith) would bow her head and bless her lunch right in the middle of the chorus room where we ate. I had never thought to bless my meals before that and started since she did it—me addin the sign of the cross to mine of course.

I felt incredibly awkward as you might imagine. So I began praying in addition to “bless us oh Lord and these they gifts…etc” the phrase “and please let me never be embarrassed to pray.”

I said that extra prayer for months before the awkwardness faded and praying publicly has been natural.

Occasionally at family functions with in-laws or out to dinner with various groups I do feel like I am pretending to be holy even though that’s not my intent. But I add in my little embarrass prayer and leave it to God knowing I am not doing it pridefully.

I also take full advantage of teaching my kids to bless their food. I figure who can criticize a mom teaching her little ones prayer? Right?

I grew up in a protestant home so we always said a prayer before meals.  Now that I am a Catholic, I continue to do the same thing but make the sign of the cross.  Whenever my husband, friend/family, and I get together at a restaurant, we always pray.  Most of the time we pray with a low voice.  In addition, we also make the sign of the cross when passing a Catholic Church, a cemetery, or an emergency vehicle (ambulance, police, fire).  In fact, whenever I hear a siren, I pray for all those involved: the victims, the emergency workers, and if it is a crime, for the criminals too.

We do - anywhere, everywhere.  If we are at a friend’s house - who obviously are our friends and know we are Catholic - we gather as a family and our friends usually join in w/ at least a bow of the head.  At restaurants - as many have said - we’ve had some positive responses from others but never an attack.  Weird looks, yes but we’re aren’t sure if that is due to our family size - 11 kids - or the laughter we usually get into when all together or just because we look funny.

Rose Mary—omgosh yes! Today’s food needs some good blessings, especially considering how much is genetically modified. The way its heading our grandkids and great-grand kids will all be infertile. Ugh.

We always say a blessing whether we are in private or public.  No need to make an elaborate production of it and no reason should be given for so doing.  In our area of the South, many persons of all different religions do the same.  It is not considered out of order and, as has been our experience, has never caused comment or censure.  Do what you know is right and stop worrying about what other people say or do.

We always pray b4 a meal in public or in someone’s home.  When we first started consistently praying before meals it felt awkward, but now I don’t even really think about it.  Although, if I’m by myself with all 6 kids and their kinda rowdy, I fell like a cliche - lol.

*********************

If we are at someone’s home who does not pray b4 meals I just pause and say a prayer internally - my DH blesses himself.  The bravest I ever was was at a dinner party I was co-hosting with my super secular mom and her very, very secular friends -including a gay “married” couple.  I was renting a house for a week in my mother’s home town of San Francisco with 3 of my 6 kids.  I figured since I was the hostess and I was certain they all knew already knew about me and my Midwest Catholic ways that I’d just go for it.  I didn’t do “Bless us oh Lord . . . ” I just thanked God for the gift of these people in my mother’s life and asked that our evening together be blessed.  And it was. I really felt the Holy Spirit and so did my guests.  Even if people think its goofy, I think most people respect sincerity.

I would like to suggest total immersion therapy.  Finger your rosary in the grocery line,  make the sign of the cross when the Trinity comes to mind and of course say grace in public.

After a few short years of cold sweats it will become a little less awkward:)

Don’t be afraid to say grace in public - or to cross yourself in public. You are spreading the faith, and are an example to other who are curious as to what you are doing. Are we ashamed of Jesus?? It is not showing off - follow the guide of the Holy Spirit no matter the situation in these small gestures, it is spreading the faith in ways we can never understand.

Do it know while you still can—the way things are going these days for serious Catholics and Christians, it’s only a matter of time before this freedom will also be outlawed.

@ Jesse - my dh prays his rosary on the train and I was surprised to learn he uses his beads - in public!  lol! But, he’s a convert so I expect that kind of crazy behavior. ;-)

A teacher of mine used tell the story of his Irish friend, a fellow maths teacher who worked in a UK boarding school where religious expression, particularly of the Catholic kind, was severely frowned up.

As a known practicing Catholic he had been explicitly warned to refrain from any such manifestation.  However, he had always made the sign of the cross over his meal before eating and no way was he going to stop. 

So, apparently every day, he would carefully make the sign of the cross over his plate and then turn to who ever was watching disapprovingly and say “As a teacher of mathematics, I can never get over the simple elegance of circles; how marvellous it is that the diameter is the same from top to bottom as it is from left to right”.  Of course, everyone knew full well what he had really done….

Hi Jennifer from a CHRP sister!

Matt.10:33 says something to the effect that “If you deny Me before men, I will deny you before My Heavenly Father.”

We must be authentically who we are in Christ at all times. It helps to read and study the scriptures. I was a protestant for 39 years!

God bless,
Susan

“A partial indulgence is granted to the Christian faithful who, in the particular circumstances of daily life, voluntarily give explicit witness to their faith before others” (Manual of Indulgences, p. 34).

Jesus said, “If you deny me before men, I will deny you to the Father in heaven.”

For years every Saturday morning after the 8 a.m. Mass people head on over to the local restaurant to continue the Meal.  We all pray outloud.  Most everyone in the restaurant got used to seeing us so now they all get very quiet until we are done.  We always ask Jesus and His Mom to sit with us.

I can sympathize with your quandary however, praise and glory to our Heavenly Father would be far more important to our soul rather a mere ‘opinion’ of another. I pray you will ‘fall in love’ with our God, in so doing, then and only then will you not have one iota of concern of another’s opinion of you!  Be the light God meant you to be & not hidden under a bushel basket!  Rejoice & be glad for all the Lord has blessed you with. Praying out of love for the greatest King of heaven and earth, be humbly PROUD you are His child (which He loves more than we can ever comprehend) and not intimidated by family, friend or foe! Jesus loves you & so do I!
God Bless,
Jeanne Marie

I cross myself before meals and pray silently if I’m alone.  More audibly if someone else is joining me in prayer. Either way, it’s generally pretty obvious to onlookers that 1. I am Catholic, and 2. I am praying.

I make the Sign of the Cross and say a silent prayer before meals, even at a restaurant. The only time I feel a bit awkward doing so is when I am having breakfast (alone) at my favorite breakfast place, a cafe specializing in Israeli cuisine, in a heavily Jewish neighborhood. I’ve learned that a Catholic can discretely make a full and complete Sign of the Cross with just a few quick wrist actions, in such a way that the casual observer might have the impression that she was making a series of random motions: as if perhaps flicking away a gnat from her brow and then immediately brushing down the edge of her collar.

AMEN Rolf Worth!

Blessed John Paul II asked all the faithful to make the sign of the cross as a blessing before meals as a visible sign of their faith when eating in public.  So my husband and I do, even though we are relatively new at being Catholic.  As protestants we always prayed before meals - in private. Now we delight to do it quietly in public with the sign of the Cross. Don’t you love being Catholic!?

I generally remember to pray and make the cross when eating in public, albeit somewhat discreetly.  I’ve had no negative response.  I also make the sign of the cross when near a Catholic church, graveyards, and emergency vehicles.  And I make it when I exit my driveway first thing in the morning.  We enjoy the freedom to publicly express our faith and I intend to exercise it.

I think Catholics ought to publicly make the sign of the cross more frequently.  I was raised Protestant (Baptist) and watching Catholics make the sign of the cross always mystified and impressed me.  It’s an incredible, if silent, tool for evangelization, especially if your life is also a witness to your faith.

In my, shall I say, artistic community, it just might prevent me from ever getting work again if I talked religion or prayed out loud. When you are surrounded by hard-core secular humanists, raging anti-religion liberals and mostly pro-homosexual, anti-family people, you learn to keep your mouth shut. I pray silently and I pray for them.  To do anything visible or out loud would be antagonistic and uncharitable. But I still pray.  If you don’t travel in similar circles, you have NO idea how bad it can be. Don’t judge me for the way I’ve chosen to peacefully navigate potentially explosive professional relationships.  I have to do what works.  Like I said: I do pray.  But since I’m praying to God, I figure its most important that He hears me & not those I’m sitting with.

When at restaurants with my family, we always pray. But that crowd is easier to please!

My wife & I try to remember to pray grace before meals when eating in restaurants; and do remember maybe 90% of the time.  The Sign of the Cross is a form of witness, even if our prayers are vocalized softly.
A bit of witnessing doesn’t (currently) hurt anyone.
TeaPot562

I work in a multicultural organization where people from all faiths gather for lunch…. and I do always, every single day since I joined here say the grace before meal, quietly with my head bowed down and begin an end with the sign of the cross

I’ve seen a change in them, the ones around me during the lunch hour, in the beginning they would keep chatting and passing around the food while I prayed. But slowly things changed, and now during my 10-15second prayer they are all silent….

For the past 17 years I have prayed openly (with the sign of the cross) before meals be it at home, in public or in homes of others (be they atheist, Muslim, Buddhist, Hindu or otherwise). No one has ever complained about it. At best they ask if I am Christian. Like today I had lunch at a Muslim restaurant and prayed in full view of everyone. Not sure why you folks over in the States have issues about prayer before meals. The fella must be pretty insecure in his/her beliefs to have a problem with people praying…

Why wouldn’t we pray the same in any situation?  What, God should only be thanked if it doesn’t make others around uncomfortable?  Often times doing the right thing does drive those who are already hardened against God farther away.  I don’t see how other people’s reactions have anything to do with it.

I do have similar fears, especially going into a public college. I’m afraid that people would look at me as “showing off” while I don’t show them Christian’s value, loving and caring.
Because basically I’m not a socialized person, but I always pray and use the sign of the cross before meals. So often before lunch I always have these conflicts in my heart, shall I put the sign of the cross or not? People would know that I’m Catholic, and I’m afraid that I’m not being a good Catholic and that would ruin Catholic’s name. So, I often decide to put the sign of the cross rather quickly before anyone sees.

We do in public as a family just to be consistent for our children, which helps keep my wife and I consistent. At work I usually say a silent prayer. Most of our friends who aren’t Christian don’t say anything and even will stop their children from eating until we’ve said our blessing.

As a convert of three years, it took me a while to pray in public before meals. I hadn’t even prayed at home before meals. After a while it just becomes natural. I pray silently but I always cross myself first and I have no idea if people notice or not nor do I care.

at a home of a non-Christian, I would probably just bow my head a bit- but here is our go-to quick public prayer

We do cross ourselves before and after and say- “Thank you, God- for this food. We love You- Amen.” (We save the long Byzantine prayers for home)

A commenter called Peter asked, “Why wouldn’t we pray the same in any situation?”

Because the Lord directs us not to.

(Jesus said): “‘When you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, who love to stand and pray in the synagogues and on street corners so that others may see them. Amen, I say to you, they have received their reward.

“‘But when you pray, go to your inner room, close the door, and pray to your Father in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will repay you.’”  (Matthew 6:5-6)

By these words Catholics have understood Our Lord not to be making an absolute prohibition against praying in the presence of others, but that He directs us, when we are with others who are not joining us in prayer, to enter into the “inner chamber” of our own hearts, and there to make our prayer inwardly, a prayer all the more reverent and devout because outwardly, it is modest, quiet, and discrete. In this way we may glorify God without drawing undue attention to ourselves, from which the Christian ought to flee always, preferring that all human attention, as far as is possible, should be directed to the Lord and to things of Heaven, rather than to one’s self.

Yes, we pray. We make the sign of the cross before and after, bow our heads and quietly, though not silently, say the words. We don’t try to be ostentatious, and we don’t act ashamed.

i love my heavenly father soo much i burst out in sharing prayers with people on street and on city bus all the time. one time at christmas a horrible fight broke out on a city bus. i had my tiny little 4 year old grandaughter with me so i started singing away in a manger the entire bus got totaly and reverently silent. awesome jesus i am in love with you!!!

Thank you, Marion (Mael Muire); that’s exactly what I needed to hear. You used the scriptural reference for my situation in life; thanks for that.

I am a convert from Judaism. It was a very difficult process to become Catholic. Because of this, I built a sort of immunity to the response of others. I care about them but in the end, I love God dearly and desire to acknowledge him in whatever way I can. So, I pray without hesitation regardless of the situation. Yes, sometimes I am aware that others may like it but in the end I am typically very kind to others and they either put up me or join me in some way. My mother is typically silent but doesn’t put up a fuss. A critical and applicable verse that may not have yet been mentioned, “If you deny me, I will deny you before the Father. If you acknowledge me, I will acknowledge you.” and St. Paul “I am not ashamed of the Gospel of Christ for it is the power of God unto salvation.” Be not ashamed. When you simply act out of love for him, his love will naturally shine through you.

BTW - the comment about praying in the closet is not applicable here. Jesus was addressing those who made a great show of prayer but had no real relationship with God… not those who humbly bow their heads to thank him for the most basic sustinance of life.

We’re such kindred spirits, Mrs. Fulwiler. Yes, I do before meals, and while nobody has been converted by my silent crossing and head-bowing thus far, I like to think I’m planting a seed that might continue to grow, under the soil, maybe for years, until one day: “Co-stanza!”

@Arden: all well and good for you to pray without concern, but really, what do YOU have to lose?  No one here is risking anything other than a few odd looks or questions.  I’m talking my work, here.  I won’t be hired. Simple as that. And I’m not denying Christ and I resent the implication that I am.  Praying in silence IS praying; don’t make it sound like it’s less of a prayer or less Catholic of me.  Its not.  Living a Christian life in the belly of the beast - one of the most atheistic, new-agey, pagan, hedonistic, liberal, homosexual fields in the world - is hard enough without insinuations that I’m doing it wrong.

Charity, please don’t allow random strangers on the Internet to disturb your peace or to turn you from the path that you have worked out with your own confessor / spiritual director in conjunction with your personal prayer, study, and reflection about what it is that God is calling you to.

If you don’t yet have a director, please go to your pastor and ask his opinion on all matters to do with the spiritual life. He is your shepherd in these matters, not random strangers on the Internet - including me. And follow what your shepherd tells you.

I wish you all the best, and may God bless you.

What an odd article! I’ll give a male opinion, which connotes brevity. Of course you pray in public!

Charity, I used to work in publishing and many of the people I worked with (most of them nice, friendly people) were also atheists or homosexuals or even very anti-religion, so I know where you’re coming from. Too much showing of your faith and you’ll be SHUNNED. Funny how illiberal and intolerant liberal and tolerant people can be! It makes life a lot harder but it made me appreciate my faith that much more. God bless you in your work. Keep being a good example to them.

“Funny how illiberal and intolerant liberal and tolerant people can be!”

Well said! Progressive “tolerant” people are most often quite selective in what they are tolerant of, often defending and affirming transgressions against traditional Judeao-Christian standards, while reacting quite vehemently against those who transgress against their own: i.e., failing to recycle, smoking in indoor public spaces, having a large number of children, being a full-time stay-at-home Mom of those children . . . then, whoa, Nelly! Look out!

Are Catholics to be “tolerant”? Catholics are to be just and charitable toward their neighbor, that is to be patient, kind, slow to anger, not puffed up or proud, not rejoicing over injuries, but rejoicing in the truth, and always seeking the good of their neighbor - and when that neighbor is someone in need, often preferring that neighbor’s good to one’s own.

Yes. We do pray at restaurants. Not for conversion of others. Funny, though, I did feel rather self-conscious of doing so just yesterday. I was out to breakfast with just our five-year-old daughter. It was her birthday, and she wanted to go to the local pancake joint. When our food arrived, I reminded her we were going to pray. She declared for all to hear. “No Mommy! I don’t want to pray! I just want to eat my peach crepes!” Heads turned and I felt like an overbearing mother pushing my faith on an innocent child. Nothing stealthy about that. I still quietly said the words. She ate her crepes.

Matthew 5:13-16:

You are the salt of the earth; but if the salt has lost its taste, how shall its saltiness be restored? ... You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hid… Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven.

Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness’ sake, For theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are you when they revile and persecute you, and say all kinds of evil against you falsely for My sake. Rejoice and be exceedingly glad, for great is your reward in heaven, for so they persecuted the prophets who were before you” (Matthew 5:10-12).

We always pray as a family.  My husband wants to make sure our girls aren’t overly loud though so we don’t call too much attention to us.

I always pray no matter the company or location.

For me, it’s about my faith and I shouldn’t be ashamed of it.  It’s about St. Francis and what he said,“preach the Gospel always and sometimes use words.” 

And it’s about the power of blessings and how we need them!

God bless you!

As usual, those quoting scripture do so without context, and I mean context of the situation.  Which boils down to prudence.  I have a good friend who is alone (as a Catholic) in the fashion industry; another field that is so militantly homosexual that to let it be known that you are Catholic is also to risk losing your job.  I’ve heard some of the things they say: priest pedophilia just scratches the surface.  Pure, unbridled hatred gets applauded.  Picture some of the hatefulness you’ve seen on the internet w/r/t gay marriage and homosex.  Now picture them being your boss.  Yeah.

Now, this person has bills to pay and children to feed.  It would not be prudent to do anything to piss off the bosses.  If we are to be IN this world, then giving up cover of stealth Catholicism would place you firmly out of some worlds.  All I’m saying is that there are very different situations and environments and circumstances.  It’s all well and good to sound so smug and self-righteous and insist that scripture supports praying out loud in public, but I’d like to see you do it at lunch with your boss right after he’s gone into a tirade about how hateful Christians are for not letting gays marry… 

And as for anyone not in the theatre (and the theatre employs far more than actors; there are set designers, costume/fashion industry people, musicians, managers, etc), imagine what it must be like to work among this:
http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/dougmiller/2011/07/13/the-end-of-broadway-ellsworth-twoohey-is-alive-and-well-on-the-great-white-way/

“I’d like to see you do it (pray) at lunch with your boss right after he’s gone into a tirade about how hateful Christians are for not letting gays marry . . .”

That would be an awful situation to be in. I would argue that that boss is not a class act, and that firm is almost certainly not, to say the least, a class operation. Class act managers don’t abuse their power in the workplace by pontificating in the presence of their underlings about matters unrelated to business, i.e., politics and religion, and especially not about contentious public policy issues. Class act managers are all about listening to the members of their team, about developing openness and trust within the team, and about bridge-building so as to further the mission of the business enterprise; they are not about to spend time and energy on self-serving, self-indulgent blathering of their own personal views on the company’s dime, while their subordinates are in the position of unwilling captive audience. No real class operation would long tolerate the antics of a manager who had a rep for behaving in that way: he or she would soon be bounced right into the position of junior bookkeeping clerk if they’re lucky, or right out the door if they’re not.

I work for a “One of the Best Places to Work in America” awarded firm, and believe me, the corporate culture is extremely zeroed in on mission focus and keeping on message and on deadline: there is no time for the intrusion of contentious political, religious, or personal topics of conversation. Everything is very bland, very professional, very non-threatening. (Some may say “boring” or “hyper-corporate”.) Once or twice in the last couple of decades, an unpleasant remark about the Catholic Church was made in my hearing. I complained. To the boss of the remarker. And the remarker was quickly sorted out; it didn’t happen again. Although in neither case did the guilty party apologize.

And in a class operation, it’s expected that when there is such a problem, and something is done about it, that the complainer moves on and gets over it, even without an apology. You have to be gracious - that’s a part of being in a class operation . . .  and part of being a Christian. So, afterward, even though I still felt annoyed, I made the effort to be as cordial and collegial as could be to the persons involved. 

Anyway, that’s a class operation, I think, in a nutshell, and if you’re not currently working in one, it might pay to pray and ask God to assist you to find your way into one. Where business is business, and where self-indulgent managers victimizing their staffers isn’t tolerated.

I too sometimes feel the anxiety of praying either in public or in the break room at work, especially since I am a police officer and we “live in a fish bowl” to begin with. People are always looking to judge and criticize us, and the latest thing is to follow us in public with cameras, making our job at times very unsafe.
One day while at work I sat down to pray as I always do, and I asked if anyone cared to join me in saying grace. To my surprise three other officers joined me (there were about 8 of us there).
Since then they sometimes join me again in exercising our meals through grace/prayer , but not always. I’m sure they are embarrassed just as I use to be. However, I have since realized that it is the ones who don’t say grace that I feel sorry for because we never know what is in their hearts. Perhaps they wish they had the courage to pray or worse yet they don’t care to.

“When the food was served, we faced an awkward moment: Do we say our usual prayer?”

## IMO: Yes, but don’t make a spectacle of yourselves - this is forbiddem by Jesus, for very good reason. That kind of overt religiosity *may be* “witnessing”, “good example”, etc, - but it can equally be be a breach of good manners, like banging on about God in the extremely tiresome way some Evangelicals do.  =It’s not charitable to make a spectacle of one’s religiosity among those who are not, or may well not be, religious; it’s far more charitable not to impose oneself on them in that way (which is often a form of self-assertion in any case). So in that position, I would say a very short grace, mentally and not vocally. Charity to others in our behaviour to them, regardless of whether they are religious or not, is after all a major, though not the only, form of charity toward God.

Yes, I always ask a blessing before meals - at restaurants, at home. I also make the Sign of Cross when I drive or walk by a Catholic Church to acknowledge the Eucharistic Presence of Jesus.

I think Jesus (in Matthew 6) has the best advice.

there is wo nderful results from good example.

Seems many are in fear of humans and pronounce all the reasons to avoid chiding workers and bosses ...I would rather love and reverance God than fear the worldly superiors.Surely a simple bowing of the head in prayer before meals in public is not only proper but warranted !

i know a good friend of mine was actually given a better postion in a company becuse his boss was so impressed he gave up part of his lunch hour to run across the street to a catholic church to noon mass.

Mary, God’s blessings be upon you and your friend !

thank you rene g. benoit blessings your way in jesus name i prya!

Our family have always prayed in public and private before meals. Don’t focus on what others might think or see,but on honoring the Maker and Creator of the food in front of you to eat. It’s that simple. It’s another trick of the “Jerk” as he tries to distract - constantly, relentlessly, in whatever way your weaknesses show. Don’t let the “bully” have the last word. Focus on the One Who died for us in the most humiliating suffering ever endured. Love and honor Him more than the Distracter Hater.

We usually pray in public/restaurants before meals. If we are hosted by someone who is not religious, then we pray to ourselves. If we are in a home that does not honor God, then we do not pray, but just to ourselves. It is their home.I do not feel we should make our hosts feel awkward. We host many dinners at our home and despite the beliefs of our guests we always pray.We usually announce that we will be starting the meal with a prayer in some casual way, and that helps non-believers prepare and not feel so awkward.
Manners are important. If someone is hosting us, it is important to honor their lead. If it seems appropriate, we may suggest prayer. Often, we host these very same people at a different time and then we lead the prayer.

I say a rosery while working out at the Gym, speaking softly as not to draw too much attention to myself.  But if someone looked carefully, they could tell I was praying.

My husband and I always pray in public/restaurants before meals. We sign ourselves and lower our voices, yet when we are together as a family and the entire table is praying we are certainly loud enough for any close tables to hear.  I think it is inspiring and comforting to see other couples/families praying publicly and only right to thank God for the gifts set before us as we ask for His blessing.  If we are guests for dinner in a home where prayer is not a habit, we ask our hosts if we may offer a prayer on behalf of all of us before we begin - we have never been turned down! :)

Many years ago, my friend was out for lunch without her children (a very rare occurrence). She said her grace and a young lady nearby came over and started talking to her. I think the lady was pregnant or having some kind of “sexual” issue and she told my friend, “I hope you don’t mind, but when I saw that you were Catholic, I figured I could talk to you.” It matters.

Just recently I heard a comment from my mother that I didn’t understand though it was meant to be humorous.  She asked if we had “rubbed our eyebrows” yet.  Clueless, I asked her what she was talking about.  She was talking about grace before meals.  My mother is Catholic and was raised in the South (Texas) but is a convert of only 15 years (being raised agnostic and raising us as church hoping Protestants).  As children we always said grace before every meal by holding our hands and bowing our heads while my dad said the prayer.  When I became Catholic 15 years ago it was a culture shock to say grace before meals beginning and ending with the sign of the cross.  This was a very public display of religious faith.  I didn’t want to be judged by the people around me so I rarely used the Catholic version of mealtime prayer (until I married my cradle Catholic husband, we use it all the time now).  The rational of her comment was that Catholics use the sign of the cross to indicate the beginning and end of a prayer whereas, the Protestant will bow their heads, cross their arms, put a hand over their eyes and touch their brow (eyebrows), and murmur a prayer.  So the comment, “Have you rubbed your eyebrows yet” was a comment on Protestant praying which is so unlike a Catholic.  I like it and it makes me want to be more public with my faith and not so shy about it.

With a group of people, yes.  Alone, no.

I pray at my desk daily during my lunch period.  I am lucky enough to work at a place where they respect my faith in God and I also have many pictures of the Jesus and saints at my desk—For I ask for their help to asist in being productive and making the best out of my work day.  If more poeple did this, I am certain the economy would turn around instead of the media and non-believers always complaining about how nothing is getting better.  Maybe the reason why “nothing is getting better” is because they would rather put their faith in man (such as the mistakes of too many poeple relying of Obama to be their savior) than surrending to God and to ask him for his grace to be the best they can be at their work!

i think jesus is very very clear on this matter:

And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full.  But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.

I live in California and get weird looks all the time. I have thought about stopping or just saying the prayer in my head.  But the thing is we are told to live the faith not just talk about it . So I was reading my bible and then felt the Lord lead me to this verse. I hope it helps anyone who is reading this or who is struggling with their faith. I believe that we have to be bold sometimes and this is one of those times.

1 Corinthians 10:31

So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.

I only read the first comment by Trevor and it confirmed everything I believe about public prayer - people who do it are doing it for a show for the audience.  It made him feel special that someone thought he was so holy for his public display - that is insincerity.  To the people who pray at a table in the restaurant - do you honestly bow your head, close your eyes and mumble your prayer when you are all by yourself?