Oprah Winfrey, the daytime television guru who encourages viewers daily by telling them they have the power to achieve any goal they might set for themselves, questioned Bristol Palin’s goal of abstaining from sex until marriage in a recent interview:
“In a Jan. 22 interview, Oprah criticized Bristol Palin, the teen daughter of former Alaska governor Sarah Palin, for recently telling In Touch Weekly that she was pledging abstinence until marriage. ‘I kind of bristled,’ Oprah began, ‘when I saw this—where you said, ‘I’m not going to have sex until I’m married. I can guarantee it’ ... I’m just wondering if that is a realistic goal. I think teaching responsibility, teaching, ya know, a sense of judgment about it, but is that a realistic position?’”
Bristol was unmoved by Oprah’s questioning, saying that abstinence until marriage was a good goal for all young women to have.
“But when you make the statement ... you don’t think you’re setting yourself up? Is that a realistic position?” Oprah pressed.
Bristol answered, “It’s a realistic goal for myself.”
I find Oprah’s “realism” here so old and tired. I wonder if there are any other goals a young woman could set for herself that would elicit this kind of “bristling” and “realism” from Oprah?
Going to college? Becoming president? Curing cancer? Go for it! But don’t kid yourself into believing you might be capable of doing something as difficult as abstaining from sex until you are married.
I’ll bet Bristol had big plans and dreams for her life that did not include becoming a mother at the age of 19. Seeing premarital sex as risky behavior with potentially devastating consequences shows maturity, not naïveté. Every one of us should applaud and encourage a young woman like Bristol Palin who dares to put chastity and life-long goals ahead of her hormones.
Apparently, though, the advice anti-abstinence types would offer young women like her is: Dream big! As long as those dreams don’t include anything unrealistic like waiting until you are married to have sex.
They can keep their advice and realism. I’d rather my kids put their faith in a different kind of “public figure” anyway:
“I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.”—Philippians 4:13
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I’m sorry but Bristol Palin is not exactly the role model we want preaching abstinence to our kids. The “horses are already out of the barn” on this one.
Hindsight is 20/20. She is clearly an object lesson for what happens when you should have made a pledge of abstinence but did not. Oprah, unfortunately, is making allowance for human weakness. Palin has no grounds for crying “foul”.
William, I don’t think thats fair - Bristol is proof that abstinence is the best idea. She’s saying, look, I made the wrong choice before and now I’m planning to make the right one.
what, people can’t recommit themselves after they make a mistake?
as for Oprah’s response - honestly, its not surprising given how she lives her own life - sex isn’t for babies and marriage, its for me, when and how I please. once you embrace that sexual ethic its hard to wrap your head around the logic of those who reject it!
I think Bristol Palin could be an outstanding messenger on this topic, precisely because the “horses are out of the barn”! Because of her experience, she will be perceived as having authenticity, especially by young women who are striving for “secondary virginity”. Forgiving herself and trusting in God’s forgiveness should be an invaluable lesson for these women.
It is very sad that Oprah has become the unofficial, or perhaps official, spokesperson for the mores of our country. Would that she were a credible example. Has Ms. Plain failed? Of course, there is living proof of her life in her young son. But perhaps, the reality of motherhood at her young age, her break-up with the child’s father, are all the moments of grace calling her to live a life of virtue until she is happily married.
@William G. Hubmann
Ever heard of Jason and Crystalina Evert? The Catholic youth chastity speakers who are the most effective in their field? Well, before they were married, Crystalina’s “horses [were] already out of the barn”. Respectfully, sir, you don’t have a clue what you’re talking about.
Danielle- Amen, sister. Boy, how low is the bar going to go? Its just too haaarrddd not to .... drink, have sex, bully, wear revealing clothing, play video games….. We are raising a generation defined by our own pathetically low expectations of them. It’s no longer about what we should do, what’s best for us, but what we’re capable of. And listen up, teens: Oprah thinks you are little better than wild animals.
WGH - you are dead wrong! I can assure you there is a huge population of regretful young women who wish they could put the horses back in the barn. They can benefit from a mentor who reminds them that they are not damaged goods and that a renewed commitment to chaste living is both possible and worth their effort.
This commentary shows that liberal feminists, like Oprah, have only one viewpoint which is set in stone. Any deviation from this way of thinking is intolerable to the worldly sophisticate who travels in Oprah’s sphere. To them Bristol Palin is living in a naive and parochial world….a fallen woman who could not possibly have the strength to change her lifestyle and begin anew. To give credit to Bristol would somehow reflect upon the lifestyle they (liberal feminists)promote and defend.
Oprah said people should be taught responsibility (meaning use contraceptives) Oprah does not realize that teenagers do not have responsibility over anything. Things are just handed to them. What Oprah is doing is verbalizing her own way of life as the right kind—she still has not married Stedman.
Do any of us really need to know if Bristol Palin wants to have sex or not? Isn’t that a private choice that doesn’t need to be the latest way for Sarah Palin to use her children for new headlines?
Those poor kids.
So because someone’s “horses are out of the barn” aka: they already had sex,apparently means they are BOUND to have, most likely will and has no reason NOT too have SEX? Wow, I truly do not believe in that statement at all. What Jason Evert and his wife are doing is truly noble, stepping out into the world and testifying that they realize how sex before marriage can really hurt a couple.
I’m not sure about Jason, but just because his wife wasn’t a virgin before she got married doesn’t make her a hypocrite for being a troubadour for chastity. If anything I think she can truly explain how being unchaste can really hurt someone and their relationships. As for Bristol, yes she had sex, she got pregnant, that is how life is supposed to work. How terrible of her to realize that she could have chose a better path and that she is now making an effort to be abstinent?
No, i think the sad part of all this is everyone’s (including Oprah’s) genuine lack of confidence in the human character and will. Maybe if the mass media and secular world wasn’t shoving, porn,immodesty,adultery and promiscuous sex down everyone’s throats maybe we could actually see beyond the haziness of immorality and see the truth, THAT MANY PEOPLE CAN AND DO LIVE PURE ,CHASTE LIVES (some for their entire life!) I think what the media and maybe Oprah should face is the facts- yes a lot of people have sex, but a lot of people don’t… so why get all riled up about someone actually representing the OTHER side.
If anyone has a right to speak to teens, I believe it is Bristol Palin. She is living the consequences of her action. She can relate to teens and they to her. Because Oprah has a life-style that she thinks is right for herself she should not think that it is right for everyone. I am glad that Bristol feels this way and publically tell teens what she believes is what they should hear.
@Jana, I seriously doubt that Sarah Palin is using her children to gain any more public attention. I believe she would love the media to focus more on her than on her children which apparently since they aren’t silencing her in any way they come after her children. Such a sad statement of our society today, that we are able to judge one another without realizing the implications that come a long with doing so.
Bristol, all you have to do is hold that thought for a month and it’s yours. Honest! Trust the Law of Attraction. Of course, it’s a little weird and unproven but what the heck. Oprah wouldn’t give it so much attention if it weren’t true. Personally, I’d place my bets on your wisdom and experience. It’s been hard won. You haven’t deserved in any way the very biased media attention lavished (unwanted, I’m sure) on you. Kudos for the mature way you have handled it. Enjoy, enjoy you darling baby and try hard to ignore the slights and slurs. Do their opinions really have any credibility anyway?
Oprah is a disgusting person and should be off the air.
William Hubmann writes, “I’m sorry but Bristol Palin is not exactly the role model we want preaching abstinence to our kids.”
I don’t see that as the point of this article at all. The point of the article seemed very clear to me: why would Oprah “bristle” at a young woman’s intention of waiting until she’s married to engage in the marital act? Why would *this* goal bother her such a point? I think Oprah’s response reveals quite a bit more about Oprah than it does about Bristol Palin.
In our school, we have had drug addicts that have spent their lives trying to fix their mistakes, criminals that have tried to stay out of jail and reform, alcoholics that have quit drinking after losing everything, ect. If a teen that got pregnant with a bum’s baby can’t relate to young people about her mistakes, how are kids going to learn the culture has been lying to them?
That’s all she is trying to do. She loves her baby, but it is certainly not an ideal situation to have a baby with no father. What is she supposed to say,....Have babies and drop out of school, start welfare, and shoot drugs to forget your troubles? If anybody is an authority on what could happen it would be her. So any cheerleaders sleeping with the quarterback needs to know what they are setting themselves up for. This is not even taking into account warts, herpes, hepatitis, syphilis, clap, and even HIV. And the dirty little secret that no one talks about is what happens to a woman that had an abortion and later figures out that she murdered her baby. I bet they won’t talk about that in school or on Oprah.
Beautifully written! Spot on!
All the comments in response to Mr. Hubman’s post are beautifully written and reveal goodness and God’s grace that will work in our lives if we accept it. I am heartened for the future of our country and of the world. Ms. Palin’s promise of chastity is to be commended and we should be praying for her and with her that she will succeed. Oprah and those who worship her apparently believe all of us are no better than wild animals and should continue to “define deviancy down”, as the late Sen. Daniel Moynihan stated.
After all, the hardest words I am challenged to live each day come at the end of the Act of Contrition—“...and to amend my life. Amen”.
I don’t believe Bristol Palin at all. It sounds like she’s just saying what anyone would expect someone in her position to say to restore her image. And its really funny how so many people are commenting so vehemently in her favour, commending her and accusing anyone who questions her of not knowing what they’re talking about when its pretty obvious from the tone of the comments that most of you are adults who have no idea yourselves. She’s already done it once before. The only reason she wouldn’t again is to prevent another scandal from happening, not because she’s “seen the light” and wants to change.
And Oprah is not “bristling” because she’s a liberal feminist who can’t imagine someone not having sex. I assume she meant that it seems like Bristol doesn’t mean it and the only reason she said that to the magazine is for the money and the publicity.
Oprah is the last person anyone should be taking moral advice from. She is a snobby elitist with bad intentions.
The term “chastity” is badly misunderstood especially by our ‘enlightened’ icons in pop culture. Chastity goes far beyond just engaging in sexual behavior, and, like all true virtues, has the ultimate goal of seeing the world in its proper perspective. The roots of “chastity” refer to purity in thought and clarity of vision in matters of sexual behavior. A chaste person is one who sees the other person for what he or she truly is: a being of dignity for whom appropriate respect and justice are due. Vice corrupts reason, thought, action and vision. Lust, like all vices, is a distortion of reason resulting in the inability to see the other in a true light. The moral relativists of our time offer a set of conditions that lower the human intellect and debase the human soul. Striving for a virtuous life, correctly understood, is the route to human flourishing and real progress.
I’m 23, engaged, and saving sex till marriage. So far, I’ve made it. Not only is the goal realistic, but also attainable! It’s too bad people have lost their faith in themselves as well as God.
William… do you have any hope for your own salvation? If Jesus Christ’s Redemption of the sinful human race does not apply to the concept of picking ourselves up and starting over, what hope is there for all of sinful humanity? Why are there programs such as AA, drug rehab, and on and on? Exactly because changing your life for the better is a reachable goal.
You know, William, St. Augustine is probably the best known role model of turning his life around, from the depths of the gutter to the glory of sainthood. His life is a testament to the reality of a holy life even after the “horses left the barn.”
Bristol Palin follows in his footsteps; my congratulations, best wishes and prayers for her success! With God, ALL things are possible. As for Oprah, maybe we should pray for her as well so the Lord softens her heart and awakens in her the reality that she, too, can become what God intended her to be… a saint.
I read this, and I just have to wonder…does the liberal mindset also say “you know, once you become married, it’s unrealistic to expect that you won’t have an extra marital affair.” After all, if we are just “slaves to our hormones,” and there is a really attractive person near by…
I applaud Bristol for her pro-life stand in keeping her baby, and her courage to give a great chastity message to a nation that needs to hear it. (We certainly hear the “just do it” message constantly.)
I remember when, after she had the baby when she had barely turned 18, Bristol said, “If girls knew what it is really like to actually have a baby, trust me, no one one be having sex.” When she said that, I knew she ‘got it’ as to priorities.
I do believe her when she says this is her goal, and she believes she can attain it. It’s an honorable goal. She is human, as we all are; so I hope she understands how to conduct herself, so as to make sexual behavior, from here on, very difficult to come by, even when she is engaged. Anyone could fail with such a goal, but the fact that she truly understands *why* this matters, even late in the game, signals to me that she means it.
Oprah lives with her boyfriend, I believe, and has done so for many years. I’d imagine that Oprah believes in contraception and, if absolutely necessary, perhaps in abortion. If so, then this, plus Bristol’s previous pleasurable experience, would skew Oprah’s view point on how ‘realistic’ abstinence until marriage would be for Bristol - as well as how NECESSARY.
What did Jesus say? If your slate is clear, then throw the first stone…....
The Manhattan Declaration
A CALL OF CHRISTIAN CONSCIENCE
Christians, when they have lived up to the highest ideals of their faith, have defended the weak and vulnerable and worked tirelessly to protect and strengthen vital institutions of civil society, beginning with the family. It was in this tradition that a group of prominent Christian clergy, ministry leaders, and scholars released the Manhattan Declaration on November 20, 2009 at a press conference in Washington, DC. The 4,700-word declaration speaks in defense of the sanctity of life, traditional marriage, and religious liberty. It issues a clarion call to Christians to adhere firmly to their convictions in these three areas.
Please
1.Read the Manhattan Declaration, then
2. Sign the Manhattan Declaration
http://www.manhattandeclaration.org/
It’s hard to comprehend God’s demands for spiritual purity among believers
although we are being commanded to follow him who is forever perfect.
Matthew 5:48 Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father…..
To see Jesus is to see the Eternal Father! No one comes to Eternal Father but by Him,His Church ,the Religion of the Cross…The religion of sacrifices for God. To lay down one’s life for the salvation of many ?
Palin is just talking of abstaning from sex before marriage?
Why it is so hard for Oprah to UNDERSTAND ? the truth is not with Oprah!
OK, I know who Bristol is… but who is Oprah?
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