Yesterday you told our little girl that she “needs to grow up, that she needs to stop pretending, that it’s not healthy to believe in ‘fairy tales’ like Santa Claus.” You told her she needs to “get over it and that nobody is going to bring her gifts except for her parents.” Our little girl loves Christmas and it’s her favorite holiday. In January she will start counting down to Christmas again as she delights in the mystery, the joy in giving and receiving, the miracles, and the anticipation. If Christmas was ever designed for the human heart it was for this little girl’s heart but yesterday she walked in the door very somber and whispered to me, “Mama, how could anyone say something like that? She says in her house only parents give gifts. She says I’m a baby and I need to grow up.”

I explained, as I do every year at this time, that every family has different customs and traditions: Papa Noel, the Three Kings or Wise Men, Santa Claus, St. Nicholas, and for some families even elves. “For our family,” I said, “it’s always been St. Nicholas who brings presents on Dec. 6 in your shoe and in your stocking at Christmas. He came to my family when I was a child and even once as an adult. He came to your father’s family when he was a child as well.”

I explained that when I was a child we did not have much, and some years were harder than others. One particular Christmas we knew there would not be enough money for presents or a Christmas meal. I was a teenager and I did not believe in Santa Claus anymore and he had stopped filling my stocking. We went to the Christmas Eve Mass and when we returned home there were large bags on the front porch. After carrying my sleeping siblings upstairs I helped my mom to bring in all the bags. There were enough gifts to cover the entire side of the living room wall and they wrapped around the tree and into the kitchen. There were also ham, fruits and other items for the Christmas feast.

How those items came to our house I do not know, but I do know that on Christmas morning I opened an art set that I had secretly wished for. I think the Christ Child was smiling down on us that Christmas morning and delighting in how much those gifts meant to a family that was having a hard year. That was the year I started believing in St. Nicholas again and in the generosity, the love and the miracles that the Christ Child can work in the hearts of those who are open to him. I promised St. Nicholas that he would be part of my family’s celebration of Christmas one day.

A few years later I was in a dark place and struggling to discern my vocation (what God was calling me to) and fighting chronic health problems with mounting medical bills, and I had been financially supporting one of my siblings who was needing some extra help at the time. On Dec. 6 (the Feast of St. Nicholas, to whom I had a special devotion at this point) I decided to go to an early Mass before work to pray for a breakthrough. There I received a special grace to know that God was going to take care of me and that everything would be alright. When I came out in the snowy church parking lot there was a beautiful embroidered stocking hanging on my car door mirror. It was filled with candy, a prayer book, gift cards from the local grocery store, and a sweet note of encouragement from St. Nicholas. I still have that stocking and I vividly remember the overwhelming sense of joy, peace and gratitude that I had that morning in that church parking lot. I knew that God had counted the hairs on my head and that he had a future full of hope planned.

A few short days later I met my now husband and we have six beautiful children. Christmas and all the joy and mystery that comes with it is something that we treasure and celebrate every year.

And to the child who does not believe in Santa I say that I do understand that St. Nicholas is not part of your family Christmas, but he is an anticipated friend at ours. Please keep Christmas in your own way and we will keep it in ours. And if by chance you have children one day, I do hope that you will consider being open to inviting St. Nicholas to bring to your children the joy and culture of generosity that he has brought to so many families for hundreds of years.

During our family prayers before dinner last night we heard a little voice say, “Dear God, I want to pray for all the people who do not believe in Papa Noel and for an end to war and that there would be peace on earth for Christmas. Amen.”

Dear reader, may this also be your prayer in this season of Advent.