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There Are Witches In My Basement

BY Pat Archbold

| Posted 7/15/10 at 1:50 AM

 

I have long been an advocate of Bishops taking a harder line with leaders receiving communion who openly oppose Church teaching and advocate immoral policies.

Bishops have understandably been reticent to withhold communion, but now one Bishop has said enough is enough and has threatened to ban a local leader from communion unless he stops his advocacy of immoral and un-Catholic policies.

That is the good news.

The bad news is that the immoral practice invoked in this case is rounding up potential witches and wizards and locking them in his basement.

Paramount Chief Chitimukulu of the Bemba speaking people in Northern Province has allegedly established an illegal prison at his palace to confine people being suspected of practicing witchcraft in his Chiefdom.

And the Catholic Church in the Archdiocese of Kasama has threatened to ban the Paramount Chief from Holy Communion because of promoting witch finding in his area.

It seems the deal-breaker in this case is that the Chief’s sorcerer slammer does not provide adequate toilet facilities.  Nothing will bring down the full wrath of the God and Amnesty International like not having adequate porta-potties in your own personal Azkaban.

While sharia law may allow for attempted murders (or actual murders) on the cast of Harry Potter actresses, the Church still frowns upon such activity.  Porta-potties or no porta-potties.

Closer home, certain Catholic politicians who oppose the Church do not seem to be in any danger of being banned from Communion any time soon.  Not that they are too worried about that anyway.

Apparently in U.S, just as in Zambia, the witches are still free to receive communion.