National Catholic Register

Culture of Life

The Boss’s Dirty Jokes

The National Catholic Register's Clip-Out and Pass-On Guide for Advent 2001 รณ Week 3

BY Jim Cosgrove

December 16-22, 2002 Issue | Posted 12/16/01 at 2:00 PM


Quick Tip God likes to converse with you the way you like to converse with others: He doesn't want you to rattle on and hardly notice him.

Reason 2 Don't you talk frequently and for significant amounts of time to those you love?

Reason 3 As a baptized per son, you are the representative of Christ's love at home, at work and in social situations. You will only represent him well if you've prayed.

Quick Tip Prayer is made of ACTS. AAdoration, C-Contrition (sorrow for sins), TThanksgiving, S-Supplication (your requests of God).

Reason 1 If you had the chance to talk to Mother Teresa, wouldn't you? Christ is infinitely greater, and you have the chance every day.

Quick Tip Kneel when you pray, or sit respectfully. Your body and soul are one. The way you carry your body is important.

Reason 5 Prayer will transform your day and make it fruitful and fulfilling.

Reason 6 Only God can make you truly happy. Not your spouse, not your body, not your intellect. Know him.

Reason 7 Do you want to go to heaven? Then get ready with habitual prayer.

Quick Tip Start by remembering God is present, and telling him in your own words why you believe in him, hope in him and love him.

Reason 8 Read Luke 10:38-42: Jesus says there is “only one thing necessary.”

Reason 5 Prayer will transform your day and make it fruitful and fulfilling. Quick Tip If you get “stuck,” you can slowly repeat the words of a simple prayer like: “My God, I adore your divine greatness from the depths of my littleness.”

Reason 9 Mental prayer is the only thing that will soften your heart besides suffering.

Quick Tip Read a brief passage from the Gospels, and picture it happening. You can even imagine Christ sitting with you.

Reason 10 Christ doesn't want you to pray because you have to. He wants you to pray because he loves you and likes talking to you.

Reason 11 Faithful prayer can give you in a moment what otherwise takes years of experience to gain.

Content: Father Lorenzo Gomez, LC (, April Hoopes (, Father C. John McCloskey ( Art: Tim Rauch. Photos: AFP.

THE ROSARY is made up of five decades — five groups of 10 beads, each separated by a single bead. Each decade is dedicated to a different mystery of salvation history. The person praying the rosary meditates on the mystery of each decade while praying one Our Father on each single bead and one Hail Mary on each of the 10 beads. At the end of each decade, the Glory Be is prayed.

Pray the Joyful Mysteries on Monday and Thursday, the Sorrowful Mysteries on Tuesday and Friday, and the Glorious Mysteries on Wednesday, Saturday and Sunday:

The Five Joyful Mysteries

1. The Annunciation (see Luke 1:26-38)

2. The Visitation (Luke 1:39-56)

3. The Nativity (Luke 2:1-20)

4. The Presentation (Luke 2:22-38)

5. Finding the Child Jesus in the Temple (Luke 3:41-52)

The Five Sorrowful Mysteries

1. The Agony in the Garden (see Mark 14:32-42)

2. The Scourging at the Pillar (Mark 15:6-15)

3. The Crowning with Thorns (Mark 15:16-20)

4. The Carrying of the Cross (Luke 23:26-32)

5. The Crucifixion (Mark 15:22-39)

The Five Glorious Mysteries

1. The Resurrection (see Matthew 28:1-10)

2. The Ascension (Acts 1:6-11)

3. The Descent of the Holy Spirit on the Apostles and Mary (Acts 2:1-13)

4. The Assumption of Mary into Heaven (Revelation 12:13-18)

5. The Coronation of Mary (Revelation 12:1-6)

Our Father who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name. Thy Kingdom come, thy will be done on earth, as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou among women and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death. Amen.

Glory be: Glory to the Father and to the Son and to the Holy Spirit. As it was in the beginning, is now and will be forever. Amen.