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Print Edition » News

Young and Pro-Life: What About Pro-Marriage?

Where Is the Debate on College Campuses?

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by Joan Frawley Desmond, Register Senior Editor Friday, Feb 03, 2012 7:46 PM Comments (9)

WASHINGTON — Victor Bermudez, the president of Franciscan University of Steubenville’s pro-life group, accompanied 400 students from Steubenville, Ohio, to the nation’s capital for the March for Life Jan. 23. Back on campus, he directs a slew of activities, from prayer vigils at abortion businesses to baby showers for mothers in crisis pregnancies.

But ask the energetic sophomore about where pro-life students come down on same-sex “marriage,” and he’ll explain that his membership remains focused on life issues.

“Abortion is the prime issue because of the sheer numbers of abortions performed in the nation. Same-sex ‘marriage’ is not something that most people want to debate,” said Bermudez, who added that “students here hold closely to Catholic teaching, and most won’t defend ‘gay marriage.’”

But what about young people on the whole?

A 2009 survey by the Gallup organization reported that “younger Americans have typically been much more supportive of same-sex ‘marriage’ than older Americans, and that is the case in the current poll. A majority of 18- to 29-year-olds think same-sex couples should be allowed to legally marry, while support reaches only as high as 40% among the three older age groups.”

A variety of studies also confirmed that Catholics were more likely than Protestants to support same-sex “marriage” and regular churchgoers were more likely to oppose it.

Yet, at the same time that college students have become more accepting of same-sex unions, traditional marriage has hit the skids. A new Pew Research Center report confirmed that barely half of adults in the nation are married — a drastic decline fueled by the postponement of marriage among college graduates — and increasing numbers of high-school graduates begin families outside of wedlock.

While pro-life outreach has become a commonplace feature of campus life at many Catholic and secular colleges, many students who oppose same-sex “marriage” think twice about speaking out.

“There is diversity of opinion on that among kids coming to our conferences,” agreed Kristan Hawkins, 26, president of Students for Life, which has experienced a rapid increase in membership. Since the group opened its doors in 2005, the number of affiliated schools and colleges and graduate programs has jumped from 181 to 670.

“A lot of students will have qualms about ‘gay marriage.’ But where the rubber hits the road they will be quiet on that issue. Some student leaders disagree with us on this. They are pro-life, but they are pro-‘gay marriage,’” said Hawkins.

She said her generation’s exposure to the destructive consequences of abortion has fueled a steady reassessment of life issues.

“They are personal witnesses to abortion. They have grown up with this. We talk about abortion as a human-rights issue. With ‘gay marriage,’ you are not stopping murder. But with legal abortion, every day children are dying; women are scarred forever.”


Personal Experience

However, personal experience has largely taken young Americans in a different direction on marriage. “They have grown up with friends who are gay; family members are gay. It’s difficult for them to say, ‘I don’t think you have the right to be married,’” she noted.

Hawkins observed that it would be a mistake to underestimate the power of political correctness and a narrow, secular mindset on many U.S. campuses, including some Catholic colleges.

“It’s enough for students to say they are Christian. There is no way they will [publicly] oppose ‘gay marriage.’ It is a problem. We don’t take a stance. It will take time to deal with this issue,” she concluded.

At Grand Valley State University in Michigan, junior Raymond “R.J.” McVeigh, president of the campus Students for Life group, echoed this judgment.

His group of 30 members concentrates on helping peers struggling with crisis pregnancies, providing a range of support, from meals to babysitting.

“Our group solely focuses on life issues, and we are classified as a service and advocacy group, as opposed to a religious group. We stay away from other themes,” he said, adding that their advocacy focuses on abortion as a human-rights issue, not a religious issue.

“The challenge our members face is the dilemma of moral relevancy: How can they relate and talk about something that is intrinsically good or evil? In an increasingly secular society, many students who are Catholic and Christians are careful about coming out with their beliefs. They try to find different ways to talk about abortion as a human-rights issue, not as a religious issue,” he said.

Catherine Palmer, a pro-life leader at the College of William and Mary, applauded Students for Life’s “Pregnant on Campus Initiative.” She described the program as “first, to love the pregnant and parenting women on our campuses, serving them, holistically, as best we can. Resources ought to be in place for them to both care for their child and finish college, should they so choose.”

Meanwhile, her organization “takes no official stance on same-sex ‘marriage.’ My position on the matter is that same-sex ‘marriage’ is a significant sociocultural concern. Surely, homosexual persons are owed profound love and respect, bearing equally massive dignity as any other person. Yet marriage, in its perennial sense, between one man and one woman, contributes intuitively to the common good, and particularly to the needs of children.”


Staying Focused

For now, most campus pro-life leaders will stay focused on the fight against abortion. But their hand could be forced as the advance of “marriage equality” flattens conscience provisions that could ultimately affect pro-life Americans in the workplace. Down the road, pro-life and traditional-marriage activists could find themselves having a common cause.

Indeed, Emily Bissonnette, a former president of the pro-life group at Franciscan University who now works as a theology of the body education coordinator at Ruah Woods in Cincinnati, suggested that Catholic students should take time to grapple with the moral and theological connection between two hot-button issues.

“Pope John Paul II … said that the root of the culture of death is ‘an eclipse of the sense of God and of man.’  Through that lens, we can see the link between same-sex ‘marriage’ and abortion and, consequently, the link between defending life and defending marital love between one man and one woman,” said Bissonnette. 

“If we look at abortion primarily as a matter of rights, then it can be difficult to see how marriage should be promoted within pro-life clubs on campus. But when seen as a matter of the dignity of the human person through ‘adequate anthropology,’ then the two issues can be seen as standing or falling together,” she added.

Victor Bermudez, who still has two more years ahead of him at Steubenville, agreed that same-sex “marriage” needs more attention. But he thought that secular arguments would have more traction with his generation.

“There is a secular way to defend traditional marriage. It’s in society’s best interest to protect traditional marriage because it’s the best environment to raise a child: with a mother and father. It’s the best way to build up society because families are the anchor for a society,” he proposed. 

To underscore the state’s interest in upholding traditional marriage, which focuses on the rearing and education of future citizens, he offered an analogy his peers might understand: “The government gives us an incentive when we recycle cans, and it’s fair that it provides incentives for strong families,” said Bermudez.

But just as the destruction wrought by legal abortion could only be acknowledged in hindsight, he wondered if his own generation might not wake up until long after the damage has been done. “I could see same-sex ‘marriage’ being legalized,” he said, “and then people realizing their mistake.”

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Posted by CJ on Monday, Feb 6, 2012 2:03 PM (EDT):

“Same sex marriage” IS a life issue.

It is a greater threat to family than abortion.

Whereas abortion kills an innocent child, “same sex marriage” aborts and entire family.

Posted by Kristen Ciaccia on Monday, Feb 6, 2012 5:24 PM (EDT):

We need to be honest.  We, the older generation, has redefined marriage for these kids through contraception and divorce.  In the US, you must be divorced before you seek an annulment.  If an intact family is a life issue and essential to a child’s well-being, then why must as family break apart before it is determined if a marriage exists? And if no sacramental marriages exists but a family does, then why wouldn’t that family be encouraged to stay together and find a way to remove the impediment and make the marriage sacramental?  We have redifined marraige to be about personal happiness and a personal relationship between a man and a woman.  The primary purpose of marriage is to procreate and provide a stable family to raise the offspring in.  This requires sacrifice, suffering and abandonment of selfish desires which leads to real personal happiness.  Maybe my generation (my husband and I are in our 40s) can live the real definition of marriage and we can hear marriage preached from the pulpits and truly affirmed in counseling and then maybe these kids will support marriage and understand that it is a life issue.

Posted by TtT Engine on Monday, Feb 6, 2012 11:55 PM (EDT):

Wake up and smell the coffee before we are closet Catholics afraid to walk the streets of America. The Obama health rationing forces Catholicsinto actions that would violate our conscience.HowDARE HE ! Abortion, euthanasia, artificial birth control, are all different heads on the same dragon. Can you not see the rapid moral decline the U.S.A. has experienced since Vatican II has been completely corrupted ? The secular left is on our front porch. Are we going to wait until they have broken down our doors. Either we are practicing Catholics or we are not. Catholicism is not a democracy, so we cannot be defeated by divide and conquer as the left has done to our nation. We do not vote on the truths that come from God, the Bible and the Magisterium. The very babies you are fighting for [thank you] are God’s gift to “married couples i.e. on man to one woman for the primary purpose of procreation”. A homosexual relationship is intrinsically disordered as per the CCC and therefore, can never be blessed by the Church. Think of the martyrs that gave their lives before us. We MUST stand tall NOW and honor the Communion of Saints like, St. Thomas More, who just said NO to King Henry VIII. May he intervene on our behalf.

Posted by Andy on Tuesday, Feb 7, 2012 12:05 AM (EDT):

The prevailing religion among young people is that all individuals have the right to do whatever they want, provided they don’t infringe on the ability of other individuals to do the same. Happily, the fetus falls into this category as an individual, thus pro-life is a “safe” viewpoint in secularized society. The problem is, Catholic teaching is not based on the individual, but on God’s plan for his people.

Posted by Sam on Tuesday, Feb 7, 2012 1:59 PM (EDT):

It has unfortunately become harder to defend traditional marriage in the public square. First of all because marriage has been eroding long before SSM became a hot topic. The widespread occurrence of cohabitation, premarital sex, contraception, and divorce make the typical wedding nothing more than an exercise in narcissism because we’re not really celebrating a meaningful milestone. They’re not celebrating the start of a new family because they’re contracepting and living together already, they’re not marking the granting of marital rights because they’ve been having sex since their third date, and they’re not really committing to a lifelong relationship because they’ve signed a prenup.

furthermore, intact families are harder and harder to come by. I have exactly one friend whose biological parents are still married to each other. It’s hard to maintain something you’ve never really had to begin with. This may explain the overwhelming sense that we’ve already lost the fight. The other side has had ample time and money to frame the debate, and we’re stuck playing by their rules. I couldn’t even formulate a good argument against SSM until I was well into college, even though I grew up in a devout and intact household.

Posted by Mike on Tuesday, Feb 7, 2012 4:52 PM (EDT):

God save us all. Without Him it’d all be hopeless.

Posted by Maxime on Tuesday, Feb 7, 2012 8:11 PM (EDT):

This is why the answer is to get government completely out of marriage.  Civil marriages are an invention of the radically Anti-Clerical French Revolution.

We don’t want government defining baptism, and we don’t need government defining marriage.

Posted by Maggie on Thursday, Feb 16, 2012 1:04 AM (EDT):

Maxime, I’ve very inclined to agree with you: in my “solution” civil unions for everyone (gay or straight) would be the norm, and marriages would be limited only to Church, as long as a church had the clearly-articulated right to deny marriage to those who did not fit their understanding of the sacrament, which for Catholics would include contracepting, cohabitating, or divorced-not-yet-annulled couples. I personally do not care about insurance benefits or hospital visitation rights between same sex couples.
But the catch is the children.
If that system- everyone gets a civil union, some people get married in Church - would destory so much about the understanding of children as part of a family. Now, it’s possible to argue that that ship has already sailed, given the way marriage has already been so undermined by contraception, divorce, cohabitation, etc. But it would get so much worse.
Catholic adoption agencies have already been forced to shut down because they refuse to place children with same-sex couples. If the civil-union-for-everyone system became the law, it would be thousands of times worse.
Similarly, states that have same-sex marriage are already indoctrinating young children in public schools with the idea that same-sex couples are the same as heterosexual couples. The “normalizing” of same-sex attraction is already happening. And it’s going to get worse, much more so if/when same-sex marriage is legal across the nation.
I don’t know the solution, other than to pray. A lot.

Posted by Laura on Friday, Feb 24, 2012 3:42 AM (EDT):

We need to be like St. Thomas Moore who died rather than acknowledge an invalid marriage.

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