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Print Edition » Commentary

Catholic Orthopraxy in a Sexually Broken World

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by Deacon John Green Friday, Sep 16, 2011 5:46 PM Comments (16)

You probably don’t need to be convinced that we live in a sexually broken world. Here’s a current snapshot as a reminder, courtesy of Enough.org:

Child pornography is one of the fastest-growing businesses online, and the content is becoming much worse. In 2008, Internet Watch Foundation found 1,536 individual child-abuse domains.

The sexual victimization of children is overwhelming in magnitude yet largely unrecognized and underreported. Research indicates that one in four girls and one in six boys will be sexually victimized before adulthood.

According to “Sex on TV 4,” a Kaiser Family Foundation study (November 2005), the number of television sexual scenes has almost doubled since 1998. Seventy percent of all shows have some sexual content — averaging five sexual scenes per hour compared to 56% and 3.2 scenes per hour, respectively, in 1998.

There are nearly 600,000 registered sex offenders in the United States today. However, as many as 150,000 are “lost” in the system, having failed to comply with registration duties and remain undetected due to law enforcement’s inability to track their whereabouts.

Half of all Christian men and 20% of all Christian women are addicted to pornography. Sixty percent of the women who answered the survey admitted to having significant struggles with lust; 40% admitted to being involved in sexual sin in the past year, and 20% of churchgoing female participants struggle with looking at pornography on an ongoing basis.

UNICEF reported in 2004 that across the world there are more than 1 million children entering the sex trade every year and that approximately 30 million children have lost their childhood through sexual exploitation over the past 30 years.

In opposition to this sad snapshot stands the testimony of Scripture, 4,000 years of consistent Judeo-Christian sexual ethic, our centuries-old understanding of natural law, and in recent times Pope John Paul II’s theology of the body, which provides an orthodox vision for re-imagining our sexualized culture. For decades now, many in the Church have articulated well this alternate vision. The challenge before us today is moving our orthodoxy into orthopraxy. Anchored in the Scripture, rooted in the Church’s understanding of natural law and the God-given beauty of human sexuality and catechized by the theology of the body, it is time for the faithful of the Church to take our “right theology” (orthodoxy) and put it into “right action” (orthopraxy).

We are all affected by the sexual depravity around us. And many of us fail or stumble. For the last 20 years, I’ve worked with men involved in prostitution on the streets.

Sexual abuse, early exposure to pornography, early sexual experiences, a lack of parental role models, and broken families all contributed to these guys ultimately selling their bodies on the streets as a means for survival. Some don’t make it, and life ends up being very short.

But others do make it off the streets. They stumble frequently, but the path to wholeness, freedom from sexual brokenness and sin is found when we help them to get up and keep on walking toward truth.

In most people’s eyes, the sex-abuse crisis Roman Catholics have weathered for almost a decade has apparently robbed the Church of any moral authority to speak about matters of sexuality. C.S. Lewis’ fictional demon Wormwood would be cackling himself silly right now.

The Church with a dynamic theology of the body, the Church with the best, consistent historical commitment to the sanctity of the person and marriage, the Church with the loudest bully pulpit to speak into the public square, has been crippled from within.

The worldly “power” we had to speak to this culture is gone. But even though we seem to have been silenced, we must keep on talking and speaking the truth.

There are some particularly courageous people reaching out to the sexually wounded and broken in our world. Dr. Rick Fitzgibbons, the director of the Institute for Marital Healing (MaritalHealing.com) in Philadelphia has counseled people with same-sex attraction and gender-identity confusion. He also serves as a consultant to the Vatican on priests with sexual disorders.

This past June, the Episcopal Commission for Doctrine of the Canadian Conference of Catholic Bishops released an excellent resource entitled “Pastoral Ministry to Young People with Same-Sex Attraction” (CCCB.ca/site/images/stories/pdf/ministry-ssa_en.pdf).

Father John Mulvey in Port Charlotte, Fla., is one of the few Catholic priests trained in counseling families and individuals affected by sexual addictions (FreedomSA.us/).

The My House Initiative (LoveIsFaithful.com) of Bishop Robert Finn of Kansas City-St. Joseph, Mo., is a diocesan action to foster the virtue of chastity and increase awareness of the effects of pornography on society.

Courage: A Roman Catholic Apostolate (http://CourageRC.net/) for those experiencing same-sex attraction has a recently revamped website with a plethora of resources for those experiencing sexual brokenness in their lives.

Communita Cenacolo (ComunitaCenacolo.org) isn’t a therapeutic setting, but, rather, a “school of life” that assists men ages 18-40 through a variety of addictions, including pornography.

Sexual Authenticity: An Intimate Reflection on Homosexuality (OSV Books, 2009) by Melinda Selmys is a rewarding read by someone able to articulate her own struggle with same-sex attraction — and how a dynamic encounter with the Church’s timeless teaching on human sexuality of the body led her to a new life in Christ.

These people and their efforts are truly blessings from God. But they are flickers of light in a black hole of need.

Deacon John Green is the author of the new book Streetwalking With Jesus: Reaching Out in Justice and Mercy (Our Sunday Visitor, 2011). He can be reached at john@streets.org.

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Posted by Patrick O’Malley on Friday, Sep 16, 2011 8:45 PM (EST):

The hypocrisy is legendary.

The Catholic church is the world’s largest pedophile protection program.  By their own John Jay study, 4% of priests were accused of sex with children, and the number is actually much higher.

The truth is that when they calculated the total number of priests, they added in ones that had only been a priest for a year or two in the 50 year study.  The honest (non-Catholic) way to do the analysis would have been to only include priests that were there for the entire time.  If those were the only ones that were included, the number jumps to a whopping 8-10%.

It gets worse than that, when you consider a bunch of other things, like:

1) this was not an investigation.  All of the information from the report was voluntary, and depended on the honesty of Catholic bishops, who are now known to be completely dishonest. 

2) three percent (3%) of diocese refused to report.  This obviously included the some of the worst.  One that refused to report was Roger Mahony in Los Angeles, who then had to pay a landmark settlement to over 500 victims four years after the report

3) most victims don’t come forward. This is the most sinister part, and Sister Mary Ann Walsh knows it.  Children that were raped by priests grow up in shame, and don’t want people to know, especially since they know they will be accused of lying by the Catholic congregation.  Child abuse psychologists estimate fewer than one in three will come forward.

Bishop Finn, who you list above, will probably go to jail.  He was in grand jury testimony TODAY for covering up for a pedophile priest for the past year.

Let me guess.  You hate this, and you don’t care that it’s the truth.  God cares about those children, and he cares that you don’t care.

Posted by Deacon John Green on Sunday, Sep 18, 2011 12:32 PM (EST):

Patrick,
I certainly understand the frustration and anger that comes through in your post. The abuse crisis has wounded and hurt so many.  Yet I disagree with your overall description of the Roman Catholic Church being a “protection program” for abusers.  Besides being a Permanent Deacon in the Church I’m also the father of four young children. As a parent, I don’t believe there is a safer organization on the planet to have my kids involved in than the Catholic Church.  The abuse crisis has led to a series of safe guards and policies that are very stringent in protecting children.  Every person engaging with my kids has been screened and Virtus trained.  The consciousness of everyone in the Church has been raised in identifying the circumstances that lead to abuse.  As a parent, I feel my kids are very safe in the Church and are loved and cared for by the people in it.

Posted by savvy on Monday, Sep 19, 2011 1:40 PM (EST):

Patrick,

Sexual abuse is found across a spectrum of churches, Jewish, and Muslim organizations.

Don’t single out the Catholic church.

Posted by JM on Monday, Sep 19, 2011 10:01 PM (EST):

An interesting article, Deacon. I am gay and do not “struggle” with my same-sex attraction, but live in a committed relationship of 13 years. It was never my same-sex attraction that “broke” me, but the hatred, institutional denial and structural discrimination that emerged as a response when I came to understand who and what I am.

However, I actually respect your integrity on this topic. We will not likely agree on the issue of homosexuality, but the issue of sexual and pornography addiction is extremely serious, and guidance from the Roman church can be a valuable resource for people struggling with this. Thank you.

I would, however, ask your thoughts on parents who kick their children out because of their emerging sexual orientations and gender identities. Here in NYC, it is estimated by the city that at least 40% of homeless youths are LGBT, and have been kicked out by their families. When they become homeless, they often have to engage in prostitution or “survival sex” for money, food or just a place to crash for a night. Without putting more blame on the children, can the church work with the parents so that they can continue to love and support their children and not make them homeless?

What I would like to ask

Posted by Deacon John Green on Wednesday, Sep 21, 2011 9:04 PM (EST):

JM,
We will indeed disagree on the issue of homosexuality but you raise some very good points, and I appreciate the “convicted civility” within which you raised them.  I worked for two years with homeless and runaway kids in New York City and certainly understand their plight.  Like most intense and complicated things related to us human beings and our family situations, I don’t think the reason kids are on the street is mono-causal; there’s usually a multi-layered set of reasons that family conflict arises and results in a kid being a throwway; whatever the reason though I agree with you that parents can react poorly when confronted with a childs belief that they are gay or transgendered.  In my article I reference the work that the Canadian Bishops recently produced: “Pastoral Ministry to Young People with Same-Sex Attraction”.  I found it to be one of the most thoughtful, balanced, and compassionate responses to this situation and I would again encourage you or anyone else to read it.  Putting that resource in the hands of families would be a good step for churches to take in encouraging families to “continue to love and support their children” as you mentioned.

Posted by JM on Wednesday, Sep 21, 2011 10:14 PM (EST):

Thanks Deacon. I pray that families get this vital resource.

Posted by Rick on Thursday, Sep 22, 2011 3:53 PM (EST):

I am sad to inform you that one of the counselors that you mentioned, Fr. John Mulvey, recently passed away.  Fr. Mulvey was an outstanding priest and counselor and was doing trememendous work in this area up to the time of his death at age 77.  His loss is yet another reason that we need more “flickers of light” in this “black hole of need.”

Posted by Deacon John Green on Thursday, Sep 22, 2011 10:56 PM (EST):

Rick, that is sad news indeed.  May God grant Fr. John a well deserved place in heaven.

Posted by PLLAHEY on Friday, Sep 23, 2011 5:57 AM (EST):

If I could redirect the focus for a moment, I would like to address two related problems that get little attention because it isn’t politically correct to discuss them.  Back in the 70’s when a lot of the scandalous behavior was happening, I was a member of a parish where the assistant priest was caught molesting boys.  I had no idea about his problem, and had always thought of him as a fine priest, a brilliant theologian, and a good friend.  I was one of very few people from the parish to visit him when he was in jail awaiting trial, and several times after that when he was serving a long prison sentence.  He was always very contrite, and, while I never condoned his actions in any way, I never condemned him personally.  Fortunately, he received very good psychological help in prison.  We live far away from eachother now and I don’t see him often, but we correspond occasionally, and, as far as I know, he has not relapsed in the 30 or more years since his release from prison.  He was a good man who failed spectacularly, got help to pull himself together, and under a duly watchful eye, has returned to a limited but successful ministry serving God’s people within necessary limits.
  Men who enter the priesthood take on an enormous challenge.  It’s one reason why there are too few priests today: few men feel that they are up to it.  It’s a difficult life with little of the support structure that married men find in a family.  Quite frankly, it’s no wonder many men fail in their attempt to live up to the very high standards expected of them.  Add to this the heinous condemnation that the entire society, along with the hierarchy of the church, heaps upon anyone who fails, and it’s no wonder the priests who are suffering are desperate to cover up.
  The Church needs to return to its own core principle of forgiveness.  It needs to evaluate the heart of the man and find the good that led him to seek to serve God and the Church in the first place.  It needs to try to help him rehabilitate himself, as my friend did, rather than casting him aside as though he were unworthy of God’s mercy.  After all, “all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God”, it’s just that these mens’ shortcomings have attracted more notoriety.  We need to reach out to them instead of beating up on them.  As far as I know, Jesus loves them and wants their souls to be saved as much as ours.
The second point is just to remind that the problem of child molestation is many times greater in the public schools, but the popular press doesn’t sell papers with that kind of truth.
Finally, I share Deacon Green’s appreciation towards JM for his “convicted civility”.  It’s important to be able to talk instead of just attacking eachother.

Posted by Deacon John Green on Saturday, Sep 24, 2011 1:38 PM (EST):

PLLAHEY: Good thoughts.  I’ve known Bob Van Domelen of Broken Yoke Ministries in Milwaukee WI for many years.  He is a former sex offender now working with others with age-inappropriate attractions.  His work is worth more attention than the Church or media give it.  One resource on his website is “Seven Sex Offender Myths”:  http://www.brokenyoke.org/uploads/Handout_10-18-09.pdf
Good food for thought and discussion.

Posted by savvy on Saturday, Sep 24, 2011 2:02 PM (EST):

PLLAHEY,

I agree that this not completely black and white, like the media makes it out to be.  I know priests who were falsely accused and as a result have lost all faith.

There are also Bishops who recently suspended two priests, for being too Catholic, because they support church views on homosexuality and abortion.

I can imagine if they were suspended for defending these things, the newspapers would be all over this.

Posted by teedy on Monday, Sep 26, 2011 6:08 PM (EST):

“Posted by savvy on Monday, Sep 19, 2011 1:40 PM (EDT):Patrick,
Sexual abuse is found across a spectrum of churches, Jewish, and Muslim organizations.

Don’t single out the Catholic church.”

—my reply-RIGHTLY said!  It’s the media that loves to feed to the public countless “Scandal” catholic reports.  There is much more abuses, rapes, sexual disconduct that goes on within other religions…

Posted by savvy on Tuesday, Sep 27, 2011 11:57 AM (EST):

teedy,

I am not sure if you are being sarcastic or genuine.

Posted by teedy on Tuesday, Sep 27, 2011 3:40 PM (EST):

Posted by savvy on Tuesday, Sep 27, 2011 11:57 AM (EDT):teedy,

I am not sure if you are being sarcastic or genuine.

my reply—I think my comment RIGHTLY SAID should give an idea….it’s the same as saying “I agree”....

Posted by Dr. M on Wednesday, Oct 26, 2011 1:19 PM (EST):

Mr. O’Malley, your hatred and disrespect for the Church aside, you should review the facts that these abominations are widespread in our culture of hedonism and sexual depravity. In NYC alone, there are thousands of incidents of child sexual abuse reported,yearly, as perpetrated by school staff members . It is a matter of fact (though totally inexcusable) that the vast majority of sexual offenses allegedly committed by priests have been in actuality,pedastery. This practice by homosexual men (that have no business in Priesthood)of seducing sexually mature of maturing teenage boys is clinically a different behavioral pattern than pedophilia.

Posted by Adriana on Saturday, Nov 12, 2011 11:20 PM (EST):

One thing bothers me, about your ministry.  It is all right to counsel male prostitutes living on the streets, and I applaud your helping them.  What about female prostitutes?  What do you do for them?  Or because they are having heterosexual sex it is OK?

What is that really bothers you?  The prostitution, the trade in human beings, the degradation?  Or just same sex relationships?  Is a man who buys a teenage prostitute from a pimp less inmoral than a homosexual one who has consenting relations with an adult?  Do you think that a victim of the sexual trade the only help he needs is with his having sex with someone of the same gender?

Do you recall the Magdalen laundries father? Do you recall the gulags your highly moral church where they locked up for forced labor and general abuse young girls for the crime of haveing been seduced or raped?

When you have cleaned up your act, admitted your wrongs, and shown proper contrition, then you can preach as to how horrible the world is.

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