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July 13-19, 2008 Issue |
Posted 7/8/08 at 12:20 PM
I am
participating in a conference sponsored by Southern Carolina Parents Involved
in Education. As I look out over the audience of high school and middle school
abstinence educators, I see what I usually see among pro-family, pro-life
groups: The audience is easily two-thirds women.
Long
ago, I concluded that the pro-life movement is the new women’s movement. But at
this conference, I noticed that hlf the audience is African-American. Is the
abstinence education movement the new civil rights movement? I think it may be.
The
teachers and guidance counselors came to this conference to learn how to be
more effective abstinence educators. They are worried about the high-risk
behavior of their youth. They don’t like it that abortion is the leading cause
of death in black America.
Black
women had more than 200,000 abortions in 2004, more than the combined deaths
from the top 10 causes of death among already-born blacks. These
African-American teachers don’t like it that nearly three-quarters of American
black children are born out of wedlock. They aren’t impressed by “alternative
family forms.”
One
gentleman stood up and told us about a proudly-pregnant 13-year-old girl, whose
mother and grandmother had come in for counseling with her. They had been teen
mothers themselves. They were delighted by her pregnancy, despite her youth,
her isolation from the baby’s father and her inability to support herself.
Memo
to the Lifestyle Left: Nobody in this largely black audience was “celebrating
diversity” of family forms.
Joining
me on the program was Dr. Linda Malone-Colon, chairwoman of the Department of
Psychology at Hampton University, a traditionally black university in Virginia.
She stressed the social significance of marriage and the importance of fathers.
Political correctness didn’t stop her from saying that marriage should be the
preferred context for sexual activity and for child-rearing. As I watched the
reactions of the participants, I couldn’t help but think of some of the college
students I’ve talked to over the years.
The
undergraduates and law students at some of America’s top universities think
themselves entitled to unlimited sex. They see no problem with shacking up with
their significant others in their dorm rooms.
When
I inform the college students that these behaviors prior to marriage increase,
not decrease, the probability of divorce, they are completely nonplussed.
Some
smarty-pants will always inform me that all those results are due to “selection
bias”: that is, people who cohabit before marriage are more likely to get
divorced, whether they cohabit or not. The unstated message of my thin-skinned
college students is, “I will have a college education and a good income. Those
people in the data who live together are all low-income losers, who would get
divorced anyhow. Don’t bug me.”
As
I said, these privileged college students came to mind when I listened
to the South Carolina African-American middle school and high school teachers
agonize over their students.
These decent men and women are trying
to help those “low-income losers,” who are at higher risk for every bad
outcome, including out of wedlock childbearing, and divorce in the unlikely
event that they ever marry. The college students, who no doubt pride themselves
on their open-mindedness and tolerance, are completely deluded about the
cultural impact of their actions.
The poor students of these teachers
in South Carolina are the ones whose lives are being ruined by too much sex,
too early in life, with too many partners, in contexts that have no chance of
supporting the pregnancies that inevitably result.
These teachers are on the front
lines of dealing with the problems created by the sexual revolution. One middle
school teacher, overwhelmed by dealing with the chaos of their student’s lives,
made the immortal statement, “We teach in our spare time.”
The undisputed social science fact
is that marriage is the best context for both sex and child-rearing. Marriage
becomes more important the farther down the income ladder you go. I concede that
maybe some of my college student audiences will dodge the bullet and get away
with their sexual messing around.
But I issue them this challenge:
Black America has made significant progress since the first civil rights
movement. Today, any significant improvements in black well-being will have to
include a renewal of marriage and the restoration of black fathers to the
family. The participants of the civil rights movement of the 1960s risked their
lives for the betterment of blacks.
The choice for the idealist youth of
today is clear: Make the sacrifices involved in sexual self-restraint and be
part of the solution. Or endorse the culture of sexual license that
systematically harms the poor, the minorities and the uneducated.
The opponents of marriage are this
generation’s equivalent of the foot-dragging, blocking-the-doorway barrier to
the next round of black uplift.
And the promoters of traditional
sexual morality, marriage and the family are this generation’s Freedom Riders.
Jennifer Roback Morse, Ph.D.
is the author of
Smart Sex: Finding Life-long Love in a Hook-up
World.
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