I have abscesses that are older than 15 years old.  If Ms. Esther obtained her husband’s conversion in just two years of praying, she is a veritable Moses, Job and Daniel.  Most of my woman acquaintances dress in mourning and offer daily mass for the souls of their intransigent and finally impenitent former husbands.  Count the number of men at your next church function, ladies, then count your blessings!

Simcha, I love your posts, and I love the premise behind this post.  But I feel compelled to make a few points that are beside the point in some ways, but pertinent in others.  First of all, while I’m thrilled that Elizabeth’s husband is joining the Church, a few months ago Elizabeth wrote a post about how dissatisfied she is with the Catholic Church.  She implied that she herself was leaving it.  She applauded commenters who criticized EWTN and the NCR (which you ask for a donation to at the bottom of your article).  Prior to her post that implied she was leaving the Church, she had many blog posts about her growing dissatisfaction with the Church and her doubts and concerns about many of its teachings.  I pray that she and her husband do remain, but she is someone who has caused divisiveness and has planted seeds of doubt about the Church in general, and it’s frustrating at how many of her posts seem to contradict each other almost to the point of being hypocritical.

That is exactly my goal, to be quiet on the outside but a prayer warrior for my family (and really, the whole world) on the inside. Off to read Elizabeth’s account. :)

The other point I want to make is regarding your request to donate to the NCR.  Every Lent I make several donations to Catholic, pro-life and other charitable organizations.  EWTN, who as you know owns the NCR, is always one of the organizations that I donate to.  This year that will not be the case.  My reason is that I have been dismayed at the lack of moderating on some of the NCR posts (not yours, as I know you carefully monitor your own posts).  There are some bloggers here who do not moderate their own posts, and unfortunately the NCR moderators have not stepped up to the plate.  They sporadically delete and block trolls, but most of the time let the trolls turn the comment sections into a platform for their own atheist anti-life agendas.  I’m not talking about differences of opinions, I am talking about trolls who are here to disrupt the dialogue and promote their own agenda.  Jennifer Fulwiler has written some brilliant articles, but the comment sections have been turned into a three-ring circus by the trolls.  I don’t blame Jennifer, as I know she has many children plus a life-threatening pregnancy and does not have the time to babysit her threads.  But as I said, the NCR moderator could step up to the plate.  Again Simcha, I am not blaming you for any of this, and I do appreciate the premise of this post.  But I hope you will consider my comments, as I do think they are pertinent.

It all comes down to the inspiration of the Holy Spirit.

@Claire - I’ll admit that I haven’t read many of EE’s posts.  Her stock in trade seems to be extreme, almost painful honesty, though, so I question calling her “hypocritical.”  I mean, I love my husband and would die for him, but sometimes I want to strangle him.  That doesn’t make me a hypocrite; it just makes me difficult to live with.

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I guess the lesson is always “reader beware” when reading blogs, especially when the author is in some kind of transition (which, I would venture to say, most Catholics are, whether they’re converts or not!).

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Re your remarks about comment moderation:  I will certainly bring this to the attention of my editors. Please keep in mind that it does cost money to have enough staff to keep a very busy website running.  I don’t see how withholding donations is going to help that situation!

Simcha:  thank you for considering my comments and for forwarding my concerns.  I understand what you’re saying about hypocritical vs extreme honesty.  But I still question fostering doubt about Church teaching (and by the way, she once made a comment about how she stopped reading NCR posts because she found them to be scary;  to me this is also fostering doubt about faithful Catholic organizations).  I also see your point about needing more funds in order to properly monitor the threads.  I would gladly donate if I was confident that would be a goal, but at this point I’m not.  If you just take a look of some of the threads on Jennifer’s articles, you’ll see what I mean.  I will certainly reconsider donating if I see evidence that this will be a priority.  Again, thank you for your consideration.

Claire, I just want you to know that you are not the only one with concerns about Elizabeth Esther and her blog.  I am sure that she has some good insights from time to time, but due to a really bad personal experience I had with her, I would definitely say “Readers Beware”... 

I am happy for her on her husband’s conversion, and her story does tie in with Simcha’s point.

My husband started taking an interest in his faith as soon as I shut up and took a course in family ministry. He couldn’t believe I could be interested in anything other than him! When I just shut up and got on with it (weather he liked it or not) he adopted the attitude of “well if you cant beat them, join them!”
I do believe most women just want their husbands approval and support in their faith. But… sometimes you gotta go it alone before they really take you seriously!
Now my husband is more Catholic than the Pope.

Blogs…heh. Readers should also remember that a blog, is really just a blog. It is a personal “web-log”. Anyone can start one and anyone can and possibly should be able to comment on one. I myself have *started* a blog a few years ago and that’s as far as it got! It seems that anything I have ever wanted to “blog” about has already been adequately said or someone (like Simcha) already says it better. There are some things I began writing but now very glad I did not finish. The point here is folks should not get too much in a dither over blogs on the internet. Remember that they are merely personal reflections by a random, possibly flawed individual and should not be held as doctrine.

Claire - Wouldn’t discussing NCR (in a public forum) and your decision not to donate be sort of like a bash against a good Catholic organization? I understand that you are not talking about major tenets of the Catholic faith but couldn’t your decision to not fund NCR (and again, to post this decision publicly) instill doubts in others about this good Catholic organization which is what you are criticizing Elizabeth for doing?
I definitely hear your concerns but maybe more appropriate to express them first in a private letter to NCR.
Also, I have never read anything from Elizabeth Esther so can’t comment on your comments. God is mysterious and amazing—maybe it will be her husband who rekindles her full and faithful love of the Catholic Church :-)
We pray for all those suffering with gum ailments, all those who pick at things, people, etc., Elizabeth and her family and her renewed love for the Catholic Church and good Catholic organizations, for improved moderation on busy Catholic blogs, and finally, that there are plenty of resources to cover the costs of such moderation and to pay inspiring authors who love their faith and write about it.
Popcorn in my gums get me everytime…and your blog reminds me it is time to schedule dental appointments…

Debbie:  I have very limited funds.  I tithe my income, and Lent is a time of year when I choose to do the bulk of my donating, partially because of the season and partially because that’s when I get my tax refund.  I have to be very choosy about where I send my money, as there are a lot of very good organizations out there.  I see EWTN and the NCR as one of those very good organizations, but since I can only donate to a few, I have to choose the very best.  When an organization gives a platform to pro-abortion atheists and lets them turn their threads into a three-ring circus, in my mind that makes them fall from the top 10.  That doesn’t mean that I don’t see them as faithful and worthwhile organizations, which is why I still watch EWTN and subscribe to this blog.  And I have addressed this privately with the NCR in the past.  Since the ridiculous comment threads are public, I think a public response is warranted.  EE once said that she found the NCR to be scary, or something to that effect.  I don’t think that is on the same plane as me announcing that I will probably not be donating this year.  And yes, I do pray for all the intentions that you mentioned.

Claire - you can give to whomever you want.  I stopped giving to my local Catholic radio station temporarily because of some of the candidate commercials they ran during the election cycle.  I figure they chose to make some big bucks that way so they don’t need my money. I gave the money instead to a very worthy pro-life charity.  Non-profits can choose how they fundraise and how they spend and we can choose how we give.  You do organizations a favor when you explain to them why you give to them or why you don’t give to them.  Most people don’t bother with giving the reasons, they just stop giving to an organization.

To those making a lot of vague defamatory statements about Elizabeth Ester that make no sense and are clear examples of calumny or detraction: I challenge someone to post a link to a post of hers where she says she’s leaving the Church, bad-mouths EWTN or NCR, or makes scandalous, clearly objectionable statements. If you can’t do that, stop your moral preening and move on.

AS the wife of a non-believer I think conversion would be the best anniversary—or any—gift I ever could receive.  But I agree the best policy is to “keep my eyes on my own work.” Otherwise I am far more likely to give scandal to my husband, than to convert him.

I’m not interested in Elizabeth Esther, except in a peripheral and illustrative way.  During a total eclipse of the sun, no one is paying any attention to the moon, although everyone is in fact looking at it.

Wow, that really struck home! My husband and young adult kids entered the Church two Easters ago (I had come back to the Church the August before after 34 years). While my kids are growing in their faith- both of our sons are discerning priesthood, my husband has been pretty slow to jump on the “Catholic bandwagon”. Like Elizabeth, I had a priest tell me to let the Holy Spirit do his job on Brian. It’s been really tough as most of the time he doesn’t seem to get it, and so often I forget to be thankful that 1)he came into the Church in the first place without me dragging him, and 2)there have been glimpses of the Holy Spirit helping him to embrace his faith. Of course, this was a great reminder that he can’t do that if I’m yanking on his spirit with my nagging. Thank you for the reminder of what I should be doing for my husband during this Lenten season and always!

@ Claire—Simcha’s article was just very funny and made good points and recognized something beautiful about someone else—Elizabeth, her prayers, and her husband’s decision to become Catholic because of them.
Since her blog isn’t one that you find troublesome, why should this be the platform for that discussion? (Although it is good that Simcha will pass your concerns along—so who knows - God works in mysterious ways…maybe it will help with the trolling on other sites - and I agree that would be an improvement).
I agree everyone can give to whomever they discern is most appropriate and according to their means- I was just uncomfortable with your post about problems with NCR while criticizing another for posting about problems with NCR.
Josh, you are right about calumny or detraction and am sorry for participating in that- thank you for pointing it out.

Josh, here’s a link:

http://www.elizabethesther.com/2012/07/elegy-for-an-illusion.html

In this post she implies that she is leaving the Church.  You can search through the comments yourself to see where she applauds commenters who criticize EWTN and the NCR.

Claire, I’m still unclear about your point about Elizabeth Esther.  Are you saying that (a) She sometimes goes off the rails, so Catholics shouldn’t read her; (b) She sometimes goes off the rails, so she shouldn’t be writing; or (c) She sometimes goes off the rails, so other Catholics like me shouldn’t be quoting her, even when she’s right?  Or something else?

Oh, I needed to hear this today—Not that I haven’t seen the Holy Spirit work *miracles*.  Good Lord, I’m thankful.
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I’ve also heard plenty of chuckling in the confessional as well.  Sometimes they are guffaws. It helps and then it doesn’t help.  The last time it happened was when I was confessing that I tell my kids to “shut up” occasionally.  Maybe that’s not so bad, but it is a pet peeve of my husband’s, and the time in question, I had told my kids to SHUUUUUUUUUUUT UUUUUUUUUUP!  The priest who was hearing my confession was the Dean of a large Catholic boy’s high school.
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The next day or so he did a whole sermon on how frustrating kids can be, and kept glancing my way.

Posted by Claire on Tuesday, Feb 19, 2013 9:08 AM (EST):

Simcha:  thank you for considering my comments and for forwarding my concerns.  I understand what you’re saying about hypocritical vs extreme honesty.  But I still question fostering doubt about Church teaching (and by the way, she once made a comment about how she stopped reading NCR posts because she found them to be scary;”
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I don’t find the NCR articles scary, but some of the comments sure are.I agree that other bloggers would do well to more quickly remove some of the disturbing & vulgar content in the comment boxes.You can see that sort of stuff ad nauseum on secular sites.

@Claire, please don’t let that troll ruin your ability to be such a great apologist. All of these months and months that you have had to deal with him/her, I’ve admired your ability to keep your cool. I think you have done some great work.  The troll is just spouting back what he/she reads on reddit and other questionable sources.  His arguments need to be refuted because they are *everywhere* on the internet.  The Devil is busy, and our high school and college aged children are being subjected to a daily ASSAULT upon their faith.  My own kid sent me a stupid meme making fun of B16, which cut me to the quick.  He thought it was harmless and didn’t understand why I would find it so hurtful.  It reminds me of Jesus, being crowned and adorned with a scarlet robe, and being spat upon.
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The Devil tries to find our weakest point, and the troll stuck his talon in yours.  For that, I am very, very sorry.

Maybe Kathleen is right.  Perhaps the NCR should be an oasis in the middle of all the chaos.  Sometimes I think the troll in question is paid by one of those fringe groups to do “evangelizing”.  The poor guy/woman is really in deep bondage.

Also: It is always here at Simcha’s that I remember why I do not blog.  The very existence of the Catholic Morality Police who read, judged, and then dragged my name and thoughts through the mud of the rest of the internet would make me leave the Church if I had to bear it personally.
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Maybe those self-appointed members of CMP need to think about that possibility, when talking about people in the fake-intimacy of the combox.

Simcha, I have tears in my eyes. When you switched topics from the gums to the husband-converting, I sat stock-still and read, transfixed. Because this is my life.

THANK YOU for this heart-stopping essay.

I love you.

I’m often astounded by the claims of non-Catholic Christians to all sorts of miracles of healing and deliverance, while good ol’ Holy Mother Church keeps plodding along with prayer, fasting and alsmgiving - lots of holy suffering and very little glory hallelujah.  If we’re God’s Church, how come he’s not lavishing us with miracles like the holy rollers.

This same reasoning applies even to Catholics who seem less “worthy” to receive a miracle, due to some shortcoming real or perceived.  How could EE experience a floor-dropping family saving redemptive miracle when she so obviously… you names it.  Somehow it takes away from all the slobbering, uh… suffering that validates our personal sense of religious righteousness.

As far as miracles go, my advice is: jump in, the water’s just fine.

Simcha:  I didn’t say that you shouldn’t be writing about her, or that other Catholics should stay away from her, or that she shouldn’t be writing.  And I do not appreciate Corita’s characterization of me as the morality police.  EE has taken stands against Church teaching.  If you look at the link I posted, you will see where she has encouraged commenters who criticize EWTN for its faithfulness to Church teaching.  I am happy for her husband’s conversion, but question her sincerity because so many of her posts have been contradictory.  It’s one thing to be honest about one’s feelings, and I understand that opposing feelings can co-exist.  But it’s another thing to disparage Church teaching and plant seeds of doubts among blog readers.  She has the right to blog, you have the right to quote her, and I appreciate the point that you made in this particular blog post.  That being said, I do think people should be aware of the bigger context in which she writes.  It’s very hard to know where she stands, so some caution is warranted.  The other issue that I raised, about trolls/donations, was in response to the appeal at the bottom of the article asking for NCR donations.

Barbara, MM and Annalisa:  thank you for your support.

Praise God, we live in the USA where it’s easy to visit a dentist.  The space between teeth can have a shape that easily ‘catches bits of food’ & makes that space difficult to clean.  A dentist may be able to fix some of the problems.  Tell the dentist if there is a reoccurring problem with the teeth.
Praise God, we are Catholics & live in a modern world.  The Catholic Church has been responsible for many scientific-developments.  It’s only beelzebub & his cronies teaching otherwise. 
As to the religious-message in this article, there is a famous Catholic Saint whose mother was told, it’s time to talk less to her son about Christianity & pray more to God for her son’s conversion. = They are both Saints now.
+A secular observation: Why do wives & mothers nag? Answer = It works!

Claire, you said:  “I do think people should be aware of the bigger context in which she writes.  It’s very hard to know where she stands, so some caution is warranted. “

I totally agree! This is a good rule for reading blogs (or anything) in general.  The thing is, I think EE is pretty upfront that she is more or less in a state of constant flux, and that she’s confused or at least unsettled about many things.  She’s not purporting to teach church doctrine or to speak for the Church, as far as I can tell. 

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I think you are underestimating how many people get genuine good—not just feel good, but actually do better—when they read that other people aren’t all neat and tidy and squared away at all times.  What she describes is something that MANY many converts go through.  I hope and pray that she settles in eventually; but I think it would be a huge mistake to discourage people like her from expressing in public what they are going through. So many people are discouraged from even trying to convert, because so many others refuse to show anything but a perfect, shiny exterior.

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I mean, geez, Bud MacFarlane used to write copiously about how to have a stable and happy marriage, right up until he decided to leave his wife and family.  I’m bringing this up not to gossip, but to illustrate what happens when people of faith pretend that everythings okey dokey when it’s clearly not.  How much damage do you think he did when people read his story and thought, “Ugh, I guess a happy marriage is an illusion, if even HE can’t hack it”?

“But it’s another thing to disparage Church teaching and plant seeds of doubts among blog readers.”

As I said, I am of the type that is more likely to feel doubt because of the behavior of the faithful doing public condemnations of others. Those are the people I think of whenever I see someone has typed the equivalent of, “Can you believe her/him?! What a bad Catholic!” in public.

Nothing personal against Claire.

I got my five lapses Catholic siblings and two of my no-particular-religion nieces Jesus:  the Infancy Narratives for Christmas, and decided to stop all direct efforts at converting them with that. No book expresses how the dirt feels on the shovel for me better than that one.  I will still talk about Catholic or biblical things with them if they seem to relate or are on my mind, but that is it.

@Claire, I hope I’m not coming across as attacking you.  This is something I have a deep personal interest in:  where to find the line between being honest and giving scandal.  I’m not saying that it’s impossible that Elizabeth Esther (or anyone else) could do some harm by expressing doubt, struggle, or even uglier things.  I’m just saying that clamping down and keeping it high and tight does its own kind of harm.

@Corita, I hope you don’t think I’m fake when I say that I’ve missed you in the com box.  I’d much prefer to swap ideas with you here than plenty of other things, like chat at the gym, or (gasp!) attend a PTA meeting.—(Both highly virtuous) I’ve gained five pounds since I discovered blogs.  I’m too lazy to blog.  I’m fine with my ole sippy straw in Simcha’s outrageous humor which is melded miraculously with the divine.

@claire - That’s what you’re worked up about? That she got frustrated with Catholics and realized she had unreasonable expectations of a church full of humans? And wrote about it on her personal blog where people come to read her opinions? 8 months ago? But has since then has 1) not written about leaving the Church and 2) shown great joy that her husband is becoming Catholic (which seems to imply she’s happy being Catholic)? This is not an offense in any way. You’re misreading the post. There is no scandal here and it certainly isn’t deserving of a public rebuke by a stranger.

Unbelieveable. Just unbelieveable.

Simcha:  no, I don’t take anything you have said as an attack.  Nor do I mean to attack anyone.  I agree that there’s nothing wrong with expressing doubts.  I feel that she crosses the line sometimes into attacking Church teaching.  But you’re right, it can be a tough thing to juggle.

Josh:  read the comments.  Specifically her applause of people who criticize EWTN and its faithfulness.  Her response to those comments bothered me more than the post itself.  I unsubscribed from her blog after that, so I assumed that she went through with her plan to leave the Church (until recently reading an article she wrote on another blog).  I’m happy that’s not the case, and I pray that she and her husband are sincere.  I am not worked up about anything.

anna lisa, are you sure it wasn’t *PULEEEEZE* BEEEEEE QUIEEEETTTT!

St. Theresa was assured by the Lord in a vision that she had never committed a mortal sin, and I have the same impression of you.

If you’re guilty of anything, it’s *poetique embellishemente*.  (Pardon my french.)

There’s a saying: “Let go and let God….” All too often we get in His way when we shouldn’t.  In the end the Holy Spirit actually accomplishes a person’s conversion.  Through His superabundant graces He can and does redirect our will without interfering with our complete freedom to exercise our will.

Great insights.  I’ve been working on being less of a picker—obsessing over little things, and more importantly nfeeling a need to demostrate and hear acknowledged that I’m right, letting a concern for truth mask pride.

...but I cant resist letting you know you’re talking to the wrong people about Windows 8—no serious reviewers have called it “dumb,” though the new interface may take some getting used to and needs more apps that take advantage of it.  Hope you liked it at Staples…but it’s up to you :)

Well, Scott, I hope this doesn’t set you back too far, but . . . you’re right. I checked it out and it looked fine, so I ordered a new laptop!  (Not from Staples, though - too pricey.) My first laptop ever.  Now I have to figure out what an app is.

Simcha, you are an alchemist.  You turn chicken to gold. :)
I also took myself to Staples recently, and spent entirely too much time seeing if Windows 8 really is stupid.  I’ve come to the conclusion that its main function is being visually attractive.

@claire - Her “plan to leave the Church” is your own invention. I read the *one* comment that mentions EWTN. It was rambling and pretty crabby toward the Church. She responded “Thank you for this. Your insight is spot on. And your words healed me today.” That’s all. And it’s a variation on a response she left to many other comments. On a day she was having a hard time with some a-holes in the Church.  Doesn’t this elicit a tenth of a benefit of a doubt?
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Also, there’s no reason to pray that someone is sincere unless you doubt their sincerity, in which case it’s more direct to just say “I don’t buy it.”
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I had never heard of Elizabeth Ester before today, so I think I’ve said what I have to say. She seems like a good woman to me. God help us all if expressing frustration in generally respectful ways, even with things that are good, like people or the Church, results in us becoming permanently untrustworthy.

I had never heard of Elizabeth or her blog, so I checked it out.  I’ve never been in her shoes before—regarding the temptation to leave the church, but I have been disillusioned profoundly by hypocrites.  That’s why I’m an egregious parish surfer.  I LOVE the priests at our parish.  I don’t go to the parish closer to my house because the pastor is a Diva.  Problem solved.
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Given the context of Simcha’s post, there is cause for celebration.  How beautiful for this new unity between a couple and for an entire family.  Sometimes we have to wait painful years for the H.S. to do his work.  “All things come to those who wait”...  There is nothing more painful than a home with a fault line running through it, even if that fault line is very subtle.  This progress made the blog post Claire referred to much less troubling. Life IS a struggle.  I didn’t read a lot of Elizabeth’s old posts but the ones I did read were spot on.  I’m happy for her and her family!

“all GOOD things come to those who wait…”

@anna lisa: I was living without regular computer access for the last four months. I missed you, too.  :) And I missed this blog; this post is a good example of why!  And the link to EE, who I have never read before and whose recent post on virginity had me cheering, was a great additional present.

AMEN!

(Ignoring lick behind ear from Fido).

Simcha, best of luck with your new laptop.  No damage done, but pray for us pickers…:)

Corita:  glad to be of service.

Josh:  exactly.  The comment about EWTN was very crabby and very derogatory toward its faithfulness to the magesterium, and her response was that the comment was “spot on” and healed her.  I find that problematic.  And no, her plan to leave the Church was not my invention.  Her post was vague (as you accuse me of being), but certainly seemed to suggest that she was leaving.  Yes, I do doubt her sincerity, and I don’t think there’s anything wrong with me praying that she and her husband are more sincere in this next chapter of their journey.

Debbie:  I’m sorry that you found my comment troubling.  As I said earlier, in my mind there is a big difference between stating that NCR is scary (her words) vs raising a legitimate issue with the NCR (unmonitored trolling).  Yes, I found Simcha’s post to be funny, as I do with all her posts, and I appreciate the point she made.  The source of the example she used perplexed me (not that I was perplexed about her, but the irony of it based on the background experience that I have with the blogger that she cites).

... & Alleluia!

@Matt you give me far too much credit.  Luckily I haven’t included an “f” word in that rather unpolite form of communication.  I hear it in my head on occasion though…;(
@Corita, I read a couple of back posts of EE too :D.  I couldn’t have agreed with her more.  Having four between the ages of 16 and 25 also forces me to think of these things all. the. time.  Sometimes I wish I could take a vacation from thinking.  It’s a good thing we don’t have to be so alone about navigating these things anymore.  Sometimes being told you are allowed to “Let go and let God”, is just what the doctor ordered.—Yep, that was me doing a chaplet of mercy for the little renegades at 4 am this morning…

Claire - Yes, I see where you are coming from in both cases and I also imagine that if you and Elizabeth and some conversations maybe it would clear up some confusions-it is possible that things have been somewhat misconstrued…however—prayers for SINCERITY ARE ALWAYS HELPFUL - so if her blog prompted you to pray for her sincerity I am sure those prayers were beneficial—just as any prayers you would pray for me (and I hope you do) will be beneficial as well.

I liked what what a previous reader (Anna Lisa) said about you being a good apologist in dealing with trolls - I am fairly new to blogs, etc. and am just learning about this troll business—it is hard for me to tell who is a troll and who is the next big convert to Catholicism. So, even with your frustration about trolls, it sounds like you do a nice job trying to clarify the faith with them - and I am sure you pray for those trolls as well. Someday, you may find many souls were saved for it.

Re: Laptops and Apps—is there such at thing as Apps for Laptops?

Thank you Debbie.  I greatly appreciate your prayers, and will gladly pray for you as well.  It was sweet of Annalisa to say that I’m a good apologist, but I’m afraid that I often fall short in that area.  Annalisa herself is a great apologist, as is Simcha and the other bloggers here on the NCR.  Anyway, I apologize if I have offended anyone, and I am truly happy about EE’s husband’s upcoming entrance into the Church and pray for them on their journey.  I subscribed to EE’s blog for a long time because she is an excellent writer and has a lot to offer, and had some very meaningful insights.  I was concerned when I noticed a trend of her posts toward dissatisfaction with Church teachings, and the post I referenced was the last straw for me.  But you’re right that on the internet there is a lot of room for misunderstanding, and again I truly hope that she and her husband are in a good place with the Church now, because she has the talent to be a great apologist herself.  Thanks everyone for your patience with me.

Claire -
It is interesting though about EE’s story of her husband’s conversion, and the story of her faith and then her expressing dissatisfaction.
I don’t know the span of time but surely if the Devil saw a shift in her husband’s faith towards Catholicism and EE’s prayerful influence - He would try to get busy to make her want to leave and quick! and distract her from her prayers—because why would anyone pray someone into the church if they no longer wanted to be there—- ? (Can you tell I’ve read Screwtape Letters recently?) It is interesting to consider—and in considering it - realizing that in her case and her husband’s the Devil didn’t win :-) Your points make me consider the greater spiritual battle at work on all of us and her miracle is even MORE powerful…
So—in this case, with this blog comment section, all our pickin’ got somewhere! Except I still don’t know about apps on PCs!
Praise be to God that He is bringing us close to him and sending that Devil packing!

That’s a good point Debbie.  And if it’s any consolation, I am very technologically backward.  You probably know more about those apps than I do!

@Matt have you ever been relieved that what you wrote got caught in the spam filter?  Good thing it didn’t regurgitate it back out…
You give me far far far too much credit, and to prove it I had admitted the far *worse* things that I *don’t* say when provoked—but that go through my head anyways.  Some day hopefully I’ll be serene like Kathleen.  Hopefully one doesn’t have to confess what a bitten tongue has prevented.  Near misses in traffic however, are a whole different story.
@Corita, I cheered too!

@ Claire

Yeah comments are often scary and insanely stupid… When I read online newspapers I avoid reading the comments. That goes for blogs too. Unless I feel I want to pick a fight and maul people.

Some people are truly filled with hate and anger that they vent (probably without thinking) in blog comments.

Nothing you can do. Of course it’s great if you have moderators that can scan the comments and remove trolls.

Most blogs I visit do not have this luxury. I hope the NCRegister will get some mods :P

Sometimes just read what the blogger writes and ignore the comments.

Otherwise if you feel masochistic go to the OTHER ‘NCR’ ... in those comments there are almost ONLY anti-catholic trolls… starting with the bloggers themselves :D
Or better said: count the blessings that NCRegister has, it could be much worse! :P

@ Claire

Yeah comments are often scary and insanely stupid… When I read online newspapers I avoid reading the comments. That goes for blogs too. Unless I feel I want to pick a fight and maul people.

Some people are truly filled with hate and anger that they vent (probably without thinking) in blog comments.

Nothing you can do. Of course it’s great if you have moderators that can scan the comments and remove trolls.

Most blogs I visit do not have this luxury. I hope the NCRegister will get some mods :P

Sometimes just read what the blogger writes and ignore the comments.

Otherwise if you feel masochistic go to the OTHER ‘NCR’ ... in those comments there are almost ONLY anti-catholic trolls… starting with the bloggers themselves :D
Or better said: count the blessings that NCRegister has, it could be much worse! :P

++++++++++

PS: I am not an avid EE follower, but I not think Elisabeth is thinking of leaving the Church. Some of posts I read recently, like the one on Pope Benedict XVI decistion to step down were very pro-catholic I thought.

Of course what really goes on in someone’s mind only God knows :P

Ismael:  that’s interesting that you have encountered the lack of moderating on other blogs.  I wasn’t aware that it was that common.  I subscribe to Catholic Exchange, Catholic Lane, Catholic Digest and personal blogs, and they are all well moderated.  I just thought that was standard.  But it seems that I was wrong, so I will definitely reconsider doing my annual donation to EWTN as previously planned.  I hear what you’re saying about reading the article and ignoring the comments, but I hate to miss out on the valuable comments.  Anyway, I’m glad to hear that EE has had some pro-Catholic posts lately.  I unsubscribed from her blog a while ago, but I did see a recent article of hers on another blog which surprised me because it indicated that she had not left the Church after all.

anna lisa, I apologize.  My intention is not for you to convict yourself against my presumption of your virtue.  Please don’t try to convince me you’re a bad sinner.  I expect it would be a sad spectacle of exploded trifles and mass exaggeration. 

I’ll quote St. Paul: Phil 2, 15 “[You are] a child of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation, among whom you shine as a light in the world…” 

You may protest, but I’m confident I’m right.

Thank you for this post. It made me cry. It’s been one of those phases in life where there isn’t enough of anything. Reading this was like hearing God say “There’s enough of Me!”

God bless you and your chickeny teeth.

anna lisa, if I have any spiritual gift at all it’s discernment of spirits. 

I wonder why someone like Simcha Fisher exposes the intimate details of her personal and family life day after day on the internet?  Is it compulsion or calling?

I believe there’s something incarnational in this soul-baring.  I believe when she lifts up her life in its sometimes exquisite, sometimes mundane, always prolific detail, people are seeing the incarnational God lifted up, in exactly the same was as at benediction.  Why would people venerate saints were it not for this God-resemblance, this Divine-demonstration in them?

When I compare you to St. Teresa or St. Lawrence or St. Anne I’m not being trivial or flip – AT ALL.  If St. Lawrence were alive today, he would be you.  If St. Perpetua or St. Felicity were alive today, they would be writing a blog under the initials SF.

And somewhere in the picture, way in the background would be a pudgy old guy “Matt B” listed in the footnotes along with Kathleen, Richard C, and Zeke as:  “Companions to the Saints.”

“far far far too much credit?”  I don’t give credit.  I merely recognize what God in his great goodness has done.  Let the credit be given to him.

What a beautiful conversion story. Thanks for highlighting it. I likely would have missed it otherwise.

And hey, been there with bad married dates. I recall saying just recently, “the baby farting really adds a romantic element to this evening.” Lol. Humor always helps!

I noticed that Elizabeth Esther’s son Jude had a bad bicycle accident on Feb. 19 and is in the hospital with a possible concussion. Their family needs prayers now.

Oh dear.  And she just had an article on another blog that I subscribe to, that she is also sick.  I will certainly pray for her family.

Oh no. I’ll light a candle in front of the Blessed Virgin for them.

Thanks, Simcha!  I read almost all the comments here, too, but prefer to focus just on your bit about the fine line between giving scandal and reflecting reality.  I’m a husband praying for the conversion of his wife’s heart.  She is technically Catholic, but it ends with the writing on the paper.  For years, I’ve been praying for her (and most likely stepping in front of the Holy Spirit with my dumb-ass comments and other stupid sins).  I guess my frustration has grown as our children have.  These precious kids need us both on board…I fear for their souls without a united front.  As it is, I have a very difficult time in this life and feel unfit to be in my role as a Catholic father.  Despite this crappy reality, I know that nobody else but Jesus has the words of eternal life.  I’m determined to make the best of the situation and beg him for the grace we each need to stay faithful to Him until we meet our natural ends.  So many Catholic shows/blogs/seminars, etc., focus on how awesome things are in strong Catholic families and marriages.  I have neither and was always discouraged.  Simcha’s blog here renews my spirit and infuses a steely determination to see this life through, faithfully executing my role as Catholic husband and father to the best of my ability, even if I don’t “feel” super awesome.  It isn’t about me, like it or not, and it’s nice to hear that others can struggle faithfully and see something positive with perseverance and trust in God.  Simcha, feel free to smack me with any Windows 8 laptops you end up with since I’ve rambled on for way too long.

anna lisa, if I have any spiritual gift at all it’s discernment of spirits. 

I wonder why someone like Simcha Fisher exposes the intimate details of her personal and family life day after day on the internet?  Is it compulsion or calling?

I believe there’s something incarnational in this soul-baring.  I believe when she lifts up her life in its sometimes exquisite, sometimes mundane, always prolific detail, people are seeing the incarnational God lifted up, in exactly the same way as at benediction.  Why would people venerate saints were it not for this God-resemblance, this Divine-demonstration in them?

When I compare you to St. Teresa or St. Lawrence or St. Anne I’m not being trivial or flip – AT ALL.  If St. Lawrence were alive today, he would be you.  If St. Perpetua or St. Felicity were alive today, they would be writing a blog under the initials SF.

And somewhere in the picture, way in the background would be a pudgy old guy “Matt B” listed in the footnotes along with Kathleen, Richard C, and Zeke as:  “and Companions.”

Matt, what a beautiful thing to accuse someone of.  First I was stunned, then became a little soggy at the mere contemplation of what it would be like to be a real bona fide saint…  Someone who could actually bypass Purgatory and fall into the arms of God. 
Shocking.  Intoxicating.
I know the evil one tempts all of us to believe that we are a little bit of loathsome in the eyes of God, but this of course is an infernal lie.  After thinking about what you wrote while cooking dinner,
what came to me is how St. Paul referred to all the believers that he wrote letters to as “The Saints in ____”.  He, Paul, THE PAUL, who wrote that he was “working out his salvation…” 
I really hope that when I’m about to die, I can say like he did, “I fought the good fight, I ran the race…”
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I have rolled around in my head what it REALLY means to commit “mortal sin”.  I honestly think that it takes a LOT to actually do this—to completely alienate ones’ self from God.  Fear, compulsion, delusion, agony—all of these forms of bondage mitigate our ability to freely choose something.  My understanding is that mortal sin is a free decision for consummate selfishness, knowing that it is a decision that rejects goodness.  I don’t really know.  I think many, (most?) Catholics who consider themselves very ordinary would truly rather die than do this.
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As for Simcha, (sorry Simcha, if this gives you claustrophobia.)She’s kind of stuck with me here. She represents an important puzzle piece for me.  Instinctively I knew there had to be kind of sanctity, that I just couldn’t put my finger on—something wrongly “sanitized” if you will, from lots of Saint books.  When I stumbled across her writings, that missing piece fell into place.(She can e-mail me whenever she feels like it if I’m like a wool turtleneck in the summertime, here, and say: “Hey. Give me some space.”)
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You described her honesty so, so beautifully.  Thank you.

Hi, Simcha!
Two sets of experiences to offer, as a reflection on Eliz. Esther’s report:
    1)  My maternal grandmother converted, as a widow, circa 1930.  She died in June 1941. I think my mother, raised an Episcopalian, wanted to convert; but my Dad, raised a Methodist, wasn’t ready.  He teetered on the edge for several years, then after several discussions with a young priest who said, “Bring out your own Bible, and let’s look at John, Chapter 6.” (Dad was hung up on the Real Presence of Jesus in the Eucharist.) 
Our whole family (2 adults, 6 kids at the time) was conditionally baptized on Dec. 6, 1947.  We held off on our First Communion until Dec. 8;  Dad said that in the future, we would always be at Mass on the anniversary of our First Communion.
Dad was also concerned that some of his four older brothers might stop talking to him a/c his conversion to Catholicism. That didn’t happen, although a couple of family “friends” - both connected with Masonic lodges - did stop seeing us.
    2) My future Father-in-law, married to a staunch Catholic of French Canadian descent, was prayed for by his wife for nearly twenty years.  My wife’s paternal grandpa was a Presbyterian minister and a respected academic at a Presbyterian college.  After the death of his father, my then future F-in-L was conditionally baptized the following Holy Saturday, receiving his First Communion on Easter that year.
My Mother-in-Law later claimed, after the death of her husband after 40 years of marriage, that she had developed insomnia from praying rosaries after her husband had gone to sleep.  I suspect that her diet and stresses may have had an influence as well.
Think of Jesus as a fisherman.  I pray that He will reel in such fish as my younger son who stopped attending Church (except weddings & funerals of family members) while in college.  Visualize a fishing line, hooked on the object fish.  The line may be wrapped around some logs, or pass through some rocky places.  My prayer is that He will eventually reel in that fish. I may not be alive in this world when it happens, but I keep praying for that event.  Remember, St Monica prayed for the conversion of her son St Augustine for over thirty years before he changed.
My BW and I pray a rosary together most days.
TeaPot562

Matt B ,
You write well.

Let me get this straight: You ate chicken which prompted a discussion of serial killers, Viet Nam, sex-abuse scandals, and teen pregnancy. Yet you didn’t discuss the suffering that the chicken you ate endured in order to satisfy your appetite? Talk about missing the obvious. You have categories for dealing with sex and violence, but don’t have a category for seeing the Christ-like innocence of non-human animals, do you?

Well, in my defense, we were at Applebees, so I’m not entirely convinced it was actually chicken.  It tasted protein-ish, though, and was a very bright shade of orange.

Former Green Beret,
I’m guessing your post was meant to be humorous?
If not, I raise chickens & if you’ve ever observed how they treat each other, it can be more like Vietnam than Calvary.

Simcha:  you are hysterical.  Thank you for the much-needed humor that you add to my life.

Annalisa:  I have to agree with Matt’s accusation about you.  And, I think you’re so right that it takes a lot to commit a mortal sin.  Which is why God is the only one qualified to determine whether or not someone actually has committed one.

Ms. Fisher: I asked a serious question and you responded with a flippant answer. So let me try it again. You and your husband chat about sex and violence, but you can’t be bothered to ask about the violence that humans inflicted on the animals you eat? Why not?

Kathleen: Those who exploit animals are a smug lot, aren’t they?

Mark Sanders ,
Smug? Perhaps, but we enjoy our chicken dinners with a sense of humor and a parcity of self righteousness.
Chickens are mini-raptors & will consume any living thing they can run down,even each other when a weaker one falls prey.
Raptors eventually get their just rewards in the gumbo pot or served with dumplings in my home.Ca c’est bon.

@Mark Sanders:  oops, I apologize for being flippant. I honestly thought you were kidding.  I eat chicken and other meat because I’m not prepared to make the sacrifice it would take to eat only animals who were slaughtered in a humane way.  It bothers me a little, but not a lot, because chickens the suffering of chickens is not as important as other things. 

.

You are more than welcome to keep on complaining about people who eat meat, but that’s all I’m going to say about it.  Thanks.

Mark, were you a Colonel in the Green Berets?

Oh, and I know I said that’s all I have to say, but now that I know you weren’t kidding, I have to say:  the innocence of animals is NOT Christ-like, except in a very peripheral, nearly meaningless way.  The innocence of animals points us to the innocence of humans which points us to the innocence of God.  But you really have to use your imagination.

Ms. Fisher and Kathleen: You two are really lightweight and I made a mistake in commenting on this article. Eat ‘em up. Goodbye.

Kathlene, your observations on the inner life of chickens has put the yardbird in a whole new light for me.  Suddenly I’m apprehensive.  Tell me, are fish any tamer?

Matt B,
Not really.Our local crawfish farmers lost much of their “crop” when flooding breached the levies around their ponds.That allowed catfish & alligator gars to swim over the banks & get free crawfish dinners.It was like an all you-can-eat seafood buffet.
Don’t even ask about hogs…they’ll eat anything that will stand still long enough.

Somehow I’m starting to relish my suburban existence.  The only really barbarous thing we have to face are property taxes.  Man is the worst predator, and tax assessors are the worst men.

matt,
Lots of folk raise chickens in the suburbs now.It’s become trendy.I think it’s good in that it removes the rosy-hued glasses from folk’s eyes regarding animal behavior.Some of the whole vegan-trend energy comes from people whose only experience with livestock is from “Charlotte’s Web” or petting zoos.
Chickens are cool, in their fashion but their habits still are closely related to raptors.Even when “free-range.”

People in my neck of the woods cultivate tax shelters and keep shady characters like Morgan and Stanley from becoming extinct.  They carry little hand-held iphones on the express bus that relay buy/sell orders to Singapore.  The mall here vies with the one in Dubai.  Girls wear air-conditioned uggs in the summer.  All the HS kids are one designer drug away from Princeton.  Public school teachers make more from reality TV appearances than from teaching - and that’s saying a lot.  The houses all have three master suites two offices a den a playroom, a fourcar garage and a lawn/pool service.  (The third master suite is for the dog.) 

But if you take a back road, you can still see signs like “Local Honey,” and “Goats for Sale.”  I had to stop going that way because it was giving my children culture shock.  It didn’t help that I would blast the radio and sing at the top of my lungs, and yelp when we saw horses.

“Take me home, country road.”

Kathleen you kill me, that is hilarious!!  I’ll never forget the day one of my kids came home from school and swore to me that birds are the descendants of dinosaurs.  He made a very compelling argument.  I shrugged and said “okay, that’s really cool.”
And yes, designer chickens and coops are the height of boho chic.  I used to have a couple of tame Rhode Island Reds, but I have to say that tame is not the same as affectionate. :) 

“Nature…suggests that a sacrifice must precede a sacrament; death is the prelude to a communion…
When we come face to face with the realities of life, we see that we live by what we slay…
Elevating this to the supernatural order,...It was our sins that slew Christ on Calvary, (who) now becomes our life (in communion).”
-Fulton Sheen

You’re on fire anna lisa.  It’s going to take me two days just to ponder all you wrote on this string and on the Hitler/Mussolini Pact.

Achtung Baby.

anna lisa,
Does “boho” mean bohemian or…?
I actually really enjoy having chickens & they’re a trip to watch.The eggs are great, too.I just realize they have both fluffy & primal sides to their nature.

Matt,
I come from an interesting family.  One thing my mother always seemed to have a handle on, was keeping appearances up.  All of us (kids)dabbled in some eyebrow raising things behind the scenes, but on the outside my mother managed to have what appeared to be a model family.  I gave up on living up to her standard years ago.  I have twice the kids, double the trouble, and found from the beginning that parenthood is profoundly humiliating at times.
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I haven’t even had the energy to interrogate #4 about his choice of “charismatic” orators.  Maybe he and his brother are just trolling me.  We do those kinds of things to each other.
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@Kathleen, yes, bohemian, or “hippy chic”.  In Marin county they are huge on “nostalgia”.  It’s not a bad thing.  Who can argue with a freshly laid organic egg?  The problem is that all the sweet craftsman houses with picket fences, and adorable chicken coops in the backyard, doesn’t keep the teens from having the highest alcohol consumption rate in the country.  They make a religion out of God’s *bounty*,of the beautiful place they live in, but leave God out of the temple.

p.s. but we don’t live in Marin anymore, we live in southern CA.  That’s a different beast.

@Matt, don’t. even. get. me. going. on. Wall. Street. I’m still tempted to write a book about my tiny little view from behind the curtains—but I know it would be bitter, and certain family members would stop speaking to me.

anna lisa,
1 - “eyebrow raising???”
2 - “profoundly humiliating at times?” This sounds a little like “it was the best of times, it was the worst of times.”  Care to be a bit more definitive?  I mean, someone could be reading this and make a critical NFP/abstinence decision.
3 - I can’t believe you’re capable of being trolled by your children.  I mean, aren’t you the one who trolls them???
4 - I’m happy you’re out of Marin.  Are you away from all the major fault lines?
5 - You can’t just part the curtain a little and then leave it at that.  It’s satanic.
6 - Maybe if you saw less of some of your family members it would be better for your mental health.  I know this works for me.  You’ve heard of “speed dial.”  There’s now such a thing as “slow dial.”
7 -

@Damien Fisher: your comment brings to mind the movie “The Green Berets” (1968) which stars the renowned John Wayne. Wayne actually went to South Vietnam in 1965 to observe the Special Forces already there at that time.
As an aside, Colonel in the military is also known as a “bird colonel” because of the insignia which depicts an eagle.

Richard, here’s a tricky question: John Wayne, whose Congressional Medal of Freedom simply read “John Wayne, American,” played many military roles during his storied career.

What is the highest ranking serviceman Wayne ever portrayed?

@Richard. My uncle used to say the movie “The Green Berets” is exactly like the Vietnam War. It goes on too long, it doesn’t make any sense, and it doesn’t have an ending.

“It’s Satanic”  Haha, my kids would happily agree with that.  Sometimes I start to tell them a funny story.  My conscience kicks in right before the punchline, when I realize that a good, upstanding mother would a. not tell that story and b. not think it was funny.  When I stop in my tracks they protest and say things like, “hey! You can’t stop there, that’s Satanic!”

“Eyebrow-raising”....ehhhh…we were good upstanding kids who liked to party.  Getting married young and having children cured us of this. I was the youngest of four and had my sister’s ID which said I was 22 when I was 16. I felt like an old soul by the time I almost ran off with my scandalous choice of a husband at 19.
Don’t your kids embarrass you ever?  Multiply your embarrassment by about 20, then re-read Simcha’s post about being in mass alone with nine kids (children smell fear and know when you’re outnumbered.)

Wallstreet?
Cliffnotes: Husband joins a start-up tech. company with brother’s best friend.  Bestfriend is a nice guy, puny stock broker with shades of evil genius who borrows money from everyone and their father.  Tech platform is used by every big name on Wallstreet to trade Bonds(Husband works for the company 10 years). Stock options are worth (excuse me?) 300k (gov’t takes half)at sale of company to multi billion dollar hedge fund.  Bestfriend (who has since dumped nice wife and children and shacked up with husband’s sister) sells for a cool 450 million. Unbelievable David and Goliath kind of story.
Both cool and very creepy.

Our home is virtually ON a minor fault line.  We all have to go one way or another.

@Damien Fisher

Why aren’t you attending Mass with your family, Damien?  If you want to take it off-line, you have my email address.

BTW, I was never in the United States military.  The closest I ever came was taking the Marine Corps aptitude test for enlisted men.  I scored pretty high.  I was going to be a cook or a computer programmer, but they could not ship me out before my father ended up crucifying me.

@Matt, sometimes Cliffnotes and Blog posts aren’t enough.  We don’t always know the whole story…even if we are there, protagonists, living the battle.  What I do know about my own life is that God can form a new man/woman from the ashes.  I am so thankful for this!  I say “thanks be to God” even if “crucifixion” (in your words and I’m so sorry) was what shockingly happened.
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What is required of men and women today to support their families can be truly formidable.  In the midst of trial and suffering, God is there, working in the way that he does.