If you're reading this, I have good news and bad news.
The good news is that you're still alive. The Mayans didn't come back to life and devour everyone's brains, as was predicted on the calendar. Or whatever it was.
The bad news is, you're still alive . . . and that means you're going to have to write a Christmas letter.
Listen, deadbeat. It's too late to send out paper cards, which you've been "taking a year off" from doing since 1993. In fact, failing to send out cards is the only Christmas tradition you've managed to keep faithfully, other than miraculously transforming, every Christmas Eve, from someone who owns six pairs of scissors and four rolls of tape into someone who...READ MORE