Honoring Birth Moms This Mother’s Day

My son's birth mother brought love and joy to us in allowing us to be his family.

(photo: Mother's Day Flowers, by ‘Melody’, via Wikimedia Commons)

Adoptive Moms. We're grateful for our children on Mother's Day and just as grateful for their birth mother's courageous choice.

Every year I make a special point of acknowledging my son's birth mother, reminding him that it was because of her that our family has him to love these past thirteen years!

When a young woman realizes she's pregnant, and the pregnancy is both unplanned and overwhelming, the abortion push begins.  "This baby will ruin your life! How can you possibly handle a child in your situation?" She's told her unborn child is "just a tiny blob; it's not a baby yet!" Often it's a boyfriend who's pressuring her to abort. Sometimes she even hears, "If you don't have an abortion this relationship is over." (Sadly, most of these relationships will end anyway....she would then be without either the boyfriend or her child.) Sometimes it's her own family urging her to "get rid of it."  They may mean well, want the best for her, to finish school, wait till she's older, has money saved, is married, whatever.

And if this young mother goes to Planned Parenthood, she'll find there's only one 'choice' they're pushing: abortion. She won't be shown a fetal model. She won't be told her baby's heart was beating by the sixteenth day. It won't be explained to her that her risk of future infertility, miscarriage, and breast cancer are all greatly increased if she aborts. Post abortion regret, depression, trauma are all very real (six times the rate of suicide in post abortion women!) There will be no encouragement to consider adoption. Area pro-life resources from maternity homes to free maternity and baby items won't be offered to her. And she certainly won't be shown an ultrasound her tiny son or daughter.

For a young pregnant girl today to withstand the abortion culture, especially if she's a teenager and has no family support around her, takes immense courage. To realize she will be unable to parent this child, for whatever combination of reasons, yet choose to continue her pregnancy with the intention of giving a waiting adoptive family the gift of her child, is so beautiful and so heroic. 

My son's birth mother, like so many others, could go on with her life knowing she did the best with a less-than-ideal situation. She brought love and joy to us in allowing us to be his family; she has no post-abortion trauma; her son will always know she wanted him to have a life that she could not provide for him. Absolutely, adoption was the best choice all around for all three of us!

The Most Important Person on Earth is a Mother 

“The Most Important Person on earth is a mother. She cannot claim the honor of having built Notre Dame Cathedral. She need not. She has built something more magnificent than any cathedral—a dwelling for an immortal soul, the tiny perfection of her baby's body... The angels have not been blessed with such a grace. They cannot share in God's creative miracle to bring new saints to Heaven. Only a human mother can. Mothers are closer to God the Creator than any other creature; God joins forces with mothers in performing this act of creation... What on God's good earth is more glorious than this: to be a mother?” —Joseph Cardinal Mindszenty Hungarian, 1892-1975