Play with your children every day
- This tires them out for bedtime.
Kiss your children before they go to bed
- That way you can tell if they actually brushed their teeth or they just ran the toothbrush under the faucet.
Hug Your Children- There are many reasons to hug your children, but a great one is that your child can’t get into too much trouble if you have your arms around them.
Know where your children are
- It’s important to know where your children are at all times. You never know when they’ll need an alibi.
Help them with their homework- Because then they’ll get into a good college and be employable so they don’t live in your basement. If you are really lucky, you can live in theirs.
Force them to eat their vegetables- Otherwise you might have to eat what’s left since they’ve eaten all the good stuff and there’s no way you’re going to go to the bother of making something for yourself.
Stay on Top of the Laundry
- By that I mean, let the kids play on top of the ginormous pile of clothes because even if they fall down they’re just landing on sweaters. Note: The underwear of anyone under 4 years old adds an entire new dimension to the game.
Teach your children to care for smaller children- Nothing makes life easier than your oldest children watching the younger ones.
Teach them phone manners- Phone manners actually means “DON’T TALK TO ME WHEN I’M ON THE PHONE!!!!!” (Caveat - unless they need to know where the fire extinguisher is, in which case I don’t even think we have one so I should be hanging up and getting out of the house now.)
Don’t let them watch too much television- That way you can watch whatever you want.
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This is why you are one of my favorite bloggers! This is a really fun and lighthearted list!
Teach your children to care for smaller children
- Nothing makes life easier than your oldest children watching the younger ones.
This gives the older children a greater share in the family responsibility. Brothers and sisters are the best gift anyone can give their children. Mothering and fathering siblings gives handson experience. Many youngsters bring other children into existence because they are lonely.
Know where your children are, because you never know when you’ll need an alibi either…
Teach your children good phone manners, you’ll never know when they’ll call 911 and if they just hang up you’ll have the police at your door.
Ha! Personal experience, I guess?
Happened to my Mom (it wasn’t me I swear). A little one called 911, hung up, then pulled the phone back off the hook so they couldn’t call back to check.
Another time my mom did get a call from 911 asking what the emergency was. Before she could say anything they heard a little girl say: “hello, yes, uh huh, ok bye!” Her response of “There’s not an emergency yet” probably wasn’t the best thing to have recorded.
My Son was 3 and called 911.Police was at my door. I had no clue what was going on. The Officer was very nice.
I really needed the laugh today :) Thanks.
Dude - you rock.
Phone manners? Dude! If they didn’t talk to me while I’m on the phone, I’d never see them again! lol
I’m good with most of these but can use improvement on 6 and especially 10.
Very good! Thanks for the funny!
Phone manners: “If you ask me while I’m on the phone, the answer is ‘no’.”
Great rules and any parent knows there’s at least a kernel of truth in the reasoning behind each rule! Good parenting is mutually beneficial to the children and the parents.
Very funny! Love your humor…always gives me a whiddle smile. :)
Ha ha! I love the laundry pile one!
My son has pulled the fire alarm in a huge hotel at 8am on a Sunday morning and needless to say we checked out as quickly as possible after that. He’s also called 911 accidentally from my parents’ phone, and yep, the cops showed up. He is Curious George x 100!
And, yep, we really do watch him carefully; he’s just that darn quick! ;)
Parenting = Growth in Humility!
I’m spreading the comment over the blogs because it’s important!
,
I hope you all had your children vaccinated! This is a story from U.S.A. Today:
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The largest U.S. outbreak of measles to occur in 15 years — affecting 214 children so far — is likely driven by travelers returning from abroad and by too many unvaccinated U.S. children, according to new research.
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The finding could highlight the dangers of a trend among some U.S. parents to skip the measles-mumps-rubella (MMR) vaccine for their children, out of what many experts call misguided fears over its safety.
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.http://yourlife.usatoday.com/health/story/2011-10-21/Unvaccinated-behind-largest-US-measles-outbreak-in-years/50852098/1
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Remember, a Playboy pinup is not necessarily a scientist. And you can thank Andrew Wakefield for the return of Whooping Cough too.
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