Dear Doomed Christian,

Saturday, March 26, 2011 12:48 AM Comments (15)

Rome
Circa 66 AD

Dear Christian Recruit,

Thank you so much for your interest in joining the Church. Your letter was forwarded to me by the former head of the evangelization and recruiting department. Unfortunately, he met a similarly grisly fate as his predecessor. They were both beheaded and stoned (though not in that order ;)

You asked about the benefits of being a Christian; well things have been a bit dodgy for this young Church. I’m sure that in the future things will get a lot better for Christians throughout the world but for now…

As you might already know Christianity is illegal. Very illegal. And the Roman Empire has been…shall we say…brutal. We’re persecuted so terribly that...READ MORE

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Awwww. Polygamists Are Sooooo Cute!

Tuesday, March 22, 2011 2:29 AM Comments (21)

With the White House punting on its defense of the Defense of Marriage Act, which restricted the federal government from recognizing anything other than marriage between one man and one woman, the pathway to legalized polygamy is looking pretty clear recently. Currently, five states recognize same sex marriage. And it follows logically that if the government has no right to restrict marriage to one man and one woman, it follows that it would have no basis for restricting marriage to ONE man and ONE woman.

Canada, which legalized same-sex “marriage” in 2005, is now awaiting a judge’s ruling whether polygamy laws are illegal. Just this week, the B.C. Civil Liberties Association intervened by...READ MORE

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Doctors Leave Baby to Die

Thursday, March 17, 2011 1:49 AM Comments (61)

Recently, we’ve all read stories from around the world about nuclear meltdowns, earthquakes, tsunamis and volcanoes. Needless to say, they’re scary, heart wrenching and terrible. But for me a story published yesterday is scarier. A story in the UK’s Daily Mail says that doctors turned their backs on a premature baby born at 22 weeks despite the mother begging for help and the baby struggling for life for 46 minutes.

You see, the baby was born 12 days too early to receive care, according to hospital rules. 12 days. So they turned their backs and walked out of the room.

The Daily Mail reports:

Tracy Godwin, 31, went into labour at just 22 weeks but despite being very early her tiny baby Tom...READ MORE

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Another Santorum Scandal?

Monday, March 14, 2011 1:17 AM Comments (66)

I think a shared nightmare among GOP political consultants starts with, “Rick Santorum walked up to the microphone and…”

Say what you want about his electoral chances, you can’t watch or read anything about politics without discovering a new Santorum scandal every other week. I love all of Santorum’s “newest scandals” reported breathlessly in the news. I always tune in expecting something horrible like he pick-pocketed Lindsey Lohan, but I’m often disappointed because I kinda’ agree with whatever he’s saying. (Am I scandalous?!)

Recently, there was the “scandal” about his comparing abortion and slavery. I do that all the time. In both cases, the government is deciding who is worthy of...READ MORE

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A Parenting Moment I'll Remember Forever

Saturday, March 12, 2011 11:28 AM Comments (13)

There are moments as a parent you know that for some reason will be with you forever. No matter how old and forgetful you get those moments will still exist clearly to be relived again and again.

I remember my two year old telling me to make the car go faster because the moon was chasing us and when we pulled into a parking lot the moon went out of sight behind the strip mall. She said, “I think we lost ‘em.”

I remember my daughter’s first goal. The poor girl was simply following the herd when someone on the other team kicked the ball and it bounced off her head into the goal. I remember her standing there while her friends cheered, unsure if she should cheer or cry. She cheered all the...READ MORE

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Staying God's Hand

Wednesday, March 09, 2011 5:00 AM Comments (17)

Blogging can be easy. You read a hundred stories of tragedies, public shortcomings and sins and you pick the most outrageous to write on. But it can really wear you down after a while. I gets so I just want to read some good news sometimes. Sadly, those stories always seem a little more difficult to find. I’m kinda’ like Lot searching for the one righteous man. But Lot didn’t have a blog.

So yesterday, I grabbed my three year old in the afternoon and we walked hand in hand to our neighborhood 7-11 just to give my poor bloggin’ head a break. She couldn’t decide between an Icee and a candy bar. The decision was much too much for her. It was like Sophie’s Choice for three year olds. While I...READ MORE

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12 Reasons It's Harder to be a Dad than a Mom

Saturday, March 05, 2011 2:37 AM Comments (54)

There are thousands and thousands of Mommy blogs out there detailing the trials and difficulties of being a Mom. There aren’t a whole lot of Daddy sites out there. Or maybe there are, it’s just called ESPN. But regardless, I’m here to explain to you the many reasons it might just be harder to be a Dad than it is being a Mom. Here’s my top 12:

1) When we gain weight we can’t blame the pregnancies.

2) When one of your daughters gets in a fight at school and your other daughter yells, “Sweep the leg Johnny” everyone blames you.

3) Our fingers aren’t made for little buttons. They’re just not. If buttons needed hammering we’d be the ones to call. Finessing buttons? Not so much.

4) Dads can’t...READ MORE

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Oh my Gosh I Am Hardly Sorry for Having Upended Thee

Thursday, March 03, 2011 4:56 AM Comments (52)

My wife is the Charlie Brown of banana pickers. She always picks the sorriest looking bananas. I don’t know if she feels sorry for them or there’s something she just doesn’t understand about bananas but she always picks the craziest looking bananas.

I offered my five year old son a banana this morning when he came downstairs to get ready for school. It was the last one. And there was a reason it was the last one. It looked like every other banana’s great grandfather. I’d tried giving it to the three year old a few minutes earlier and she backed away all wide eyed with her hands up to fend me off like I was brandishing a weapon. I didn’t want the banana to go to waste so when my five year...READ MORE

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About Matthew Archbold

Matthew Archbold
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Matt Archbold graduated from Saint Joseph's University in 1995. He is a former journalist who left the newspaper business to raise his five children. He writes for the Creative Minority Report.